Known Donor but over 36

[Ladyluck11]

Hi everyone

So we have 1 turn left on the NHS for egg donation but it has to be a known Donor. At our last meeting at the clinic our consultant asked us if we knew anybody who was 36 who could help us. I told her that all our friends were the same age of myself and partner. I’m 39 and my partner is 41.

She told me that my friend may be able to help and explained the risks with using an older donor ie: miscarriage and chance of having a Down’s syndrome child. My friend was happy to go ahead and filled out all the health Questionnaires. I would of used her earlier if I had of known that the age had went up from 35 to 36 only found this out last time we went to the clinic. Feel a bit cheated by them.

So my friend went to the clinic and saw a different consultant and donor nurse to the one I see and was asking her loads of questions like this isn’t going to work as your too old. She got told there is a 15% chance of it working as long as we accept the risks. She has had some blood to check her AMH and FSH levels. We need to see her count for her eggs and has to be at a high number to be considered for treatment. She then told me if we decided to go through with it, there would have to be a meeting with the doctors, nurses and consultants to see if it’s worth the risk and the money to spend. We myself and my partner have went through loads he can’t believe our final go is going to have to go through a panel process. When I know people use their own eggs well into there 40’s.

Has anyone experienced this before or come across it, we are still in two minds what to do 15% chance is better than 0% but it’s weighing what to do for best in the long run. Sorry for long post, we don’t know who to turn to for advice.

Thanks 😕

I forgot to say my friend is 39 xx

[baby2016]

This is a hard decision for you and a lot will depend on her blood results, as in amh and fsh. What a selfless friend you have who has offered this gift.

If it is that you cannot find anyone else then I'd definately be giving it a try. I can't see how they can give success rates when they don't known blood results and there are plenty of ladies on here at the age of 36 who have had successful pregnancies.

I'm using DE through a private clinic and 35 is their cut off age to accept donors. I think the AMH levels have to be above 15 to be considered, but not 100% sure if I've remembered that correctly.

Evidence does show the younger the donor the higher number of embryos day 5 you should get. I was a bit worried that my donor was nearer the 35 cut off from reading her profile as she'd done a lot with her life, but sounded so similar to me that I wanted to go ahead and was told by the clinic she was not as old as what I probably thought, and had just done an awful lot with her life. On this round we got 8 eggs fertilised of which 2 made it to day 5 and 2 to day 6, so 4 good blasts which was far better than I'd ever achieved, so age does def play a part. You may get less blasts with someone over 35, but again depends on their results, and if you have no other people who have said they'll help then if it was me I'd definately be giving it a try as you'll always be thinking what if. If you went or were thinking of the private route then you would have a much bigger pool to pick from and they would be matched as close to you as possible. Good luck in what ever you decide xx

[sandra81]

My sister donated for me. She has no children of her on. When she donated she was 5 months from turning 36. I am now pregnant with twins. Friends had discouraged me from going this route first because she did not have kids of her own and also that her eggs would be old. The doc tested her and said everything was good. We are even left with two embies on ice. Could not have hoped for a better outcome for me and my partner. However we did not go through a panel of questions mostly because I was self funding I think.