I've not posted on here for a while, purely out of worry and not wanting to tempt fate and at least try to get past the 7-8 wk mark, but as the post states, I had my first Doner Egg transfer on 23rd Feb of 2x day 6 blasts after convincing the clinic to let me have a more natural cycle which did work and my lining for Upto 7mm which is good for me and much better than the previous 3 months which was all medicated. By test day, it was a very strong positive and repeat bloods showed very high HCG levels. I was convinced it was twins and think the clinic thought the same. Went in for a scan at 6wk 3 days which showed one sac and embryo with a very strong heartbeat and all measuring bang on. Got pics/videos etc, my mind was eased a little but had booked in for another scan today as we planned on telling our family over a meal this Sunday where I would have been 8wks. No-one knew about this round, other than a few friends I have made on here, and tbh is has been lovely as me and hubby have been in our own little bubble. Another reason we needed the tell the family was my hubby was excepted onto the liver transplant list last week and we can expect a call literally anytime so thought we needed to let them know to ease any stress when it happens. So the clinic scanned me today for it to reveal it died at 6wk5days, so 2 days after my last scan. This is very similar time to my last one which was a natural pregnancy 3 years ago. I feel so numb and thought with using DE that we may have overcome this hurdle as always been told it must be my Eggs. Whereas looks like it's just my body rejecting.
I've got to come off all meds (wean of the steriods) and if not bled by next Tuesday be referred to local EPU, of which I have such sad and bad memories of that place. I know what's coming and it knocks me sick. I don't know wether to cry/scream, but just feel exhausted. My gut feeling has never been wrong when it comes to this and I've felt different since Monday. Sounds crude to say, but even my nipples changed, last week they were getting bigger and slowly darker, this week they started lightening and going back to their normal 'state'.
Now just more waiting and more uncertainty...and now I'm slowly beginning to think that this is never going to work 😢 I've got 2x 5 day blasts left from this round and lots of thinking time ahead 😢