Miscarriage 😢 heartbroken - Fertility Network UK

Fertility Network UK
24,868 members36,774 posts

Miscarriage 😢 heartbroken


Good morning everyone

My first ultrasound at 6+5 showed a large haematoma lateral to the sac.

After that I had some bright red spotting but no cramps.

Had another scan at 7+6 that showed a strong heartbeat but sadly the haematoma doubled the size and was seriously compromising the baby.

Yesterday , at 8+5 I had a some bleeding but this time also some cramps and that feeling that something was not right.

My husband left work and took me to A&E.

We stayed there hours and hours waiting. The bleeding calmed down and the cramping was a lot better, so I allowed myself to have a little of hope.

Unfortunately the scan confirmed that my baby’s heartbeat stopped. Baby was measuring right so I we think he died yesterday. 😕

They gave me the 3 options and I chose the surgical one.

I am booked in for Tuesday morning, but have the feeling that I may miscarry naturally before that.

I was told to expect a lot of pain and pass a lot of tissue.

My husband has been so supportive, I love him so so much, but I need to admit, I am so scared. I don’t think I am prepared for what’s about to happen...

I am also so sad and heartbroken... we fought so much for this baby, we invested so much time and money and we loved him/her already more than I thought possible.

Life is really unfair and cruel sometimes

I would like to send a tight hug to all of you that have been through the same, some of your more that once. You are very brave xxx

34 Replies

Oh Cat my heart breaks for you. I am so sorry.

Surgical helped me because physically it was over quickly and that gave me time to deal with the mental side of things. The procedure in itself is quick and painless.

Sending you hugs and my sympathies xx

I’m so terribly sorry to read this. It’s beyond sad. I hope the procedure goes well and you recover quickly. Sending lots of love xx

I'm so sorry for your loss CatDV, I hope you get all the love and support from your loved ones. Sending you all my love 💐

Oh cat I'm so sorry to hear this !!!!

It's truly devestating and maybe more so as you had progressed further

We didn't even make it to the first scan... And by time we did we had already miscarried naturally 😔

If the pain is bad ask for codeine (make sure you prep for the constipation that comes with codeine though!) Or at least reg paracetamol if you do miscarriage before the procedure

Really pray you guys are a rock to each other and we can already feel the love between you and your hubby - you'll make it through xxx

Hi Sorry your going through this, I am too with my 3rd have a MVA booked in for tomorrow i'll be 12w baby didnt grown so just and empty sac. If you need to talk message me I had 2 natural mc aswel if you need to know anything. Sending hugs xx

in reply to gcw104

So sorry you are going through this for the third time 😢

Incredibly unfair. I’ll be thinking about you tomorrow. Sending my love xxx

You are so strong xxx

Oh my love I’m so sorry. I’m truly devastated for you. I thought this was your time 😢

I had a loss at 4.5 weeks I had bleeding & was expecting bad news at what would’ve been my 6 weeks scan, but to see all okay with baby at 2 scans & then get bad news is unimaginable. 💔

The sense of loss is unimaginable & you just feel numb.

You will get through this, but it will take time to get there, you never forget but just learn to live with it. 😢

Grieve as much as you need, cry rant it’s not bloody fair.

It upsets me so much to see how many lovely ladies here have to go through this heartbreak, like this journey isn’t heartbreaking enough 🙄

There are no words that will make this feel better but know that we are all here for you ❤️ and do remember just because this pregnancy didn’t work out doesn’t mean the next pregnancy wouldn’t 💗xoxo

So very sorry, its devastating. I'm sending you much love and strength. I'm sure all the ladies here hug you right back xx

I'm so so sorry to see this querida. Nothing I can say really, but I'm thinking of you xxx

Oh my dear Cat, this is heartbreaking news, words cannot explain what your pain is like😥

I’ve opted myself for surgical way as this was the quickest way to deal with this all and that was reasonable decision for me. Although I’ve been signed off from work for two weeks after this I was really fine next day.

I hope you will find a peace one day, lots of cuddles to you hun😘😘😘

Oh my goodness I am so sorry to read this. Life really is very very cruel. Being scared of what happens next is understandable. I miscarried naturally whilst waiting for surgery - I had to wait almost two weeks so hopefully this will not be the same for you. If you want to ask any questions about my natural miscarriage I am happy to answer them feel free to send me a message if you’d like to.

Sending you big gentle hugs and lots of love my heart really does go out to you xxx

So sorry, this is so heartbreaking. , don’t be scared, you will be well cared for. Big hugs.

Hi cat DV I’m so sorry. How heartbreaking for you. I was 8+ when I miscarried and had the pessarries and tablets which didn’t work too well but after a long time everything came away that needed to, but if I had been given that choice again I would have opted for surgical because it was a long process and was very painful for me. To a point where I passed out. I think you’ve made the right choice as I’ve heard the bleeding is far far less. I’m sorry your going through this. What a sad start to the year. I’m do glad you’ve got a supportive partner. I was on my own when it happened to me and I’m sure it would have been easier with that sort of support. Much love to you 💕💕💕💕

So sorry for your loss Cat! Absolutely gutted for you both!💔😢 Sending love & hugs.xx

I’m so sorry to read this, sending big hugs xx

Oh Cat, I’m speechles and so upset for you. Please be kind with you. Sending a lot of warm hugs from Italy ❤️

So sorry for your loss - heartbreaking. I’m on my 7th loss, one missed miscarriage. Sending love your way xx

in reply to Steph8080

So sorry you had to go through 7 losses 😢

Sending my love xxx


Hi Cat. So sorry to hear that your little one has passed away. You will be scared, I'm sure, but they will look after you, I know... I have had losses too, and know how important having a loving partner is. Talk about what has happened and lots of cuddles. The ladies here will surround you with their love too. If little one doesn't pass on his/her own, then I shall be thinking of you next Tuesday. Love and hugs. Diane xx

in reply to DianeArnold

Thank you for the very kind words Diane.

You are a truly special lady ❤️❤️

in reply to CatDV


Thank you very much lovely ladies for all the love and support in your replies ❤️❤️

They truly made me feel less alone and a little more brave to face what’s coming.

You are all amazing. This community a godsend to so many of us.

I am so sorry to read this, Cat. My thoughts are with you both, it is just awful xx

I am so sorry to read about your loss. I can understand how hard it must have been for you. However, don't worry! Just stay positive. Moments like these are hard to go through but you have to be strong. The surgery option will be quick so I believe it will be a little easier. All my prayers are with you. If you want to talk we all are here.

I’m so so sorry that this has happened. Utterly heartbreaking 😔.

Look After yourself xx

Your poor thing, so unfair. Wishing you all the strength you’re going to need for the coming weeks xx

I’m so, so sorry to read this. It’s so unfair and heartbreaking. Sending you big hugs 💕 xx

I’m so sorry that you are going through this. It’s totally heartbreaking. I can relate to how you are feeling. I can’t offer any advice about the surgical procedure because I ended up going with medical management after lots of indecision. But all options must be pretty awful in their own ways I imagine. So sending you all my love and positivity over the next few days. Take care xx

So sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself as best you can xx

No more words to really add that these lovely ladies have said- all I can say is eventually it does get easier to deal with, even though it doesn’t seem like it right now. Sounds like you have a special man in your life and supporting each other is the most important thing at the moment. Sending you love and hugs at this difficult time. X

Oh Cat 😭 i am so sorry you are going through this, truly heartbreaking. Give yourselves both time to grieve, theres no time limit on when you should have accepted what has happened and remember to always speak and confide in each other more than anything else, thats the one thing hubby and i have learnt along this painful journey, its easier to take your pain out on each other, but if you can get through this strongly together it definitely helps xx

So very sorry my heart breaks for you xx

I am so so sorry to read this 😞❤️


I'm so sorry to read your sad news. Lots of love to you and your husband xx

You may also like...