New here, fourth FET and in the dread... - Fertility Network UK

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New here, fourth FET and in the dreaded TWW slowly going mad!!


Stumbled across this thread as, like I'm sure a lot of you ladies can relate to, I'm frantically googling day by day how people feel each day after ET.

Bit about me, been TTC for about 5 years now, we're still on our first round of IVF with the NHS due to several reasons. I developed OHSS so the ivf had to be cancelled but I managed to get 4 blastocysts on ice. Subsequently had 2 failed FET, found out I was pregnant naturally but had a MMC, had another FET which failed then in the midst of downregulating for my fourth go we found out DH had cancer so obviously put the IVF on hold so we could focus on DH. Life is pretty steady now so we picked up the IVF again and I'm now 5dp5dt. Really pleased I've found this site, don't think I've come across it before so it's nice to have a place to come where people know what you're going through. This time round I've only told close family we're going through it again, in the past I've been more open with friends and colleagues, but found the extra pressure just stressed me out. So I'm currently trying to hide I'm a hormonal mess from all the drugs and just trying to hold it together. I'm constantly exhausted, keep getting headaches, it feels like someone's been using my boobs as punch bags and I keeping getting nauseous, but I'm pretty sure all that is just down to the horrible hormones as I've felt like this on other cycles and they've always been negative. I now don't even get my hopes up, part of me already feels like it's failed, and I find it's easier to deal with it if I think that way, rather than get my hopes up for them to be shattered again.

I just want something to go right for us for a change :( but anyway enough woe is me, I must try and be more positive!

17 Replies

Hi there, welcome 😁

Just wanted to wish you lots of positive vibes for a successful outcome 💕 xx

Welcome. Wow you are so strong. Hopefully you will find the extra support you need here. Ask anything you like about any worry. Of course we are not medical experts, butbwe can share experiences. Sometimes it is just that little bit of extra reassurance we need and that makes all the difference.

Hope you keep relaxed and sending you positive vibes xx

Thank you both for the warm welcome. I should point out despite me coming across really negative I'm actually much more laid back this time (at least so far I am!). I took some time off work after ET to put my feet up,something I've never done before, I guess after everything I'm now thinking if it's meant to be it'll be.

One thing the embryologyst did say which confused me a bit was the blastocyst was quite big, she didn't give any indication if that was a good thing or not. The transfer wasn't as smooth either, the first attempt didn't work, it was still in the tube(?), can that damage it somehow?

It's good that you are relaxed. I have bonuses what the comment about the size of the blastocyst means - maybe ask the clinic? It could just be a passing observation. Would be good if you could share what their response is when you ask them? Hope you are staying positive today again. Xx

Welcome to the group! And good luck with your journey. Hopefully that 2ww will hurry up for you! x

Hi and welcome. I’ve done 4 twws, they never get any easier. Good luck for otd xx

Welcome to the forum and good luck 🙂 xxx


I know it’s terribly hard I’m the same today 5dp5dt it’s frustrating But I have been here three times before and nothing makes it any easier.

Good luck to you and try not to google anything just makes me more anxious xxxx

It really doesn't get any easier does it :( How you holding up?

I’m eager to test today but holding off!! I have a migraine so I’m bed and feeling rubbish. When are you testing?? I should be Monday but going to the weekend. 🙏

Hey Everyone, I'm also 4dpt.... Its our 2nd IVF we only had 1 embryo to transfer from this cycle and I'm a ball of mixed emotions, trying to keep it together. I fly back to the US today from Madrid where we did the treatment. If this does not work I will have to do it all over again... Its incredibly difficult. I'm just praying that this is the one that works. Good luck to you all.

galaxyEngland in reply to Shosh

Keeping everything crossed for you that it works xx

This is a really tough struggle, but you have managed to do the IVF against all odds. And now, you are experiencing symptoms of early pregnancy. Sending lots of positive vibes your way. Have you tried acupuncture after the transfer as it enhances the quality of the embryo and makes a difference? I am sure, you obgyn would have told you to take prenatal vitamins, balanced diet with protein, fruits, and juices. Staying hydrated all through the day. Avoid caffeine, quit smoking and drinking. However, these tips are suggested months before TTC. but its never too late to make a difference. Moreover, mediate avoid excessive exercise. Moreover, it is suggested that after the transfer, avoid taking hot baths, and heavy lifting. Stay away from anxiety and stress. Stay home, relax, and enjoy Netflix. These tips will make the transfer a success. Lots of good wishes. Hope this ET is a success. Stay calm and happy

Thank you. I tried acupuncture last time round and to be honest, other than leaving me out of pocket (it's so expensive!) I didn't particularly feel the benefit of it, and it didn't change the outcome so decided against it. Before ET I was doing yoga which really helped with my mental well being, but have stopped any exercise since ET and I can't remember the last time I had alcohol, have switched to decaf tea etc. so I know that, even if it doesn't work, I've done everything I'm supposed to. I might try and do some meditation just to get me through the next few days though

I’m on the TWW now too! 4 days in and slowly descending into madness. Have found that just getting through one day at a time is helpful. Also cake. I have my fingers crossed for you that this works out well xxxxx

Thanks, fingers crossed for you too! I have to admit I have a sweet tooth, I was trying to be really good but have caved in to sweet treats a few times!

Yeah, this is the time when you feel like doing anything you can to ensure that nothing hinders the process. Do what relaxes and suits you. Plan a movie night, or anything that snaps you out of the "hopeless mode”. BTW, yoga works great to shed some stress and keep your sanity intact ;). I hope the whole process does not tire you and go like a breeze.

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