Donor sperm

[Emthom]

Hi,

I am a newbie here, my husband and I have just had our first failed icsi cycle. My husband has a 0 sperm count and needed surgical removal for this one cycle, our only option now is to use donor sperm which he is struggling to get his head around. How have people over come this? His mind is going into over drive thinking that both him and his parents won’t bond with the child as it’s not biologically his. We have been ttc for 6 years and a lot of effort put in (I had to lose 6 stone to qualify for NHS) to get to this point. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you

[Flower_17]

I am going to be in the same boat, l just wondered how you feel about sperm donor too? Do you feel ok about it?

[Emthom in reply to Flower_17]

Hi Flower-17, honestly I am not sure. Before our first cycle I said no as I didn’t feel right about it all, but now we’ve had our failed cycle both of us have begun to discuss it more. It’s been a long journey to get to here and neither of us feel ready to draw the line yet and because I know what an amazing father he would be my heart says yes but my head still isn’t quite there.

[Flower_17 in reply to Emthom]

Yeah I have days when I am all for it and think well least if successful the baby would look like me, then other days I’m just not sure what if he doesn’t bond what if he holds it against me. But then I see the way he looks at our friends babies and I think he would be able to love any child that was brought into the world and if you carry it and have been through the whole process from the start what’s the real difference if it is technically not his sperm? Would you go through the nhs or private if you do decide to go down the donor route?