Should i complain. I have been told l... - Fertility Network UK

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Should i complain. I have been told lies. Messed about. Left clueless, Almost missed IVF cut off date. What a ride.

bibi_16 profile image
25 Replies

Hi , everyone. Hope everyone is okay. and wishing everyone lots of love.

I wanna complain about my clinic. It a long story.

My clinic said they are ref me to a clinic in london for ivf this was in sep 2017

i was n hubby was asked to do blood work on 17 sep at the app. We did the blood work on the 15 september and I was in touch with clinic i was being ref to on the 17 sep and they told me they can not treat me and hubby becuz hubby is hep b positive n my consultant should not waste time sending the ref there as it will only be rejected. The consultant failed to tell me this at the time when she said she has decided to ref me for ivf.

So i email my consltant secretary and tell hr to tell my consultant to ref us else where becuz sending the ref to london clinic will only cause delays and my ivf ref will be rejected. I also asked why my consultant not know this before. she should have been aware of this. Thanks god i found out about this before my consultant sent the ref.

secretary emails bk saying she didnt know anything about this and she has not sent anything as yet to this clinic in london. and she will ask my consultant why i wasnt told this at the time when she said she is ref us for ivf.

i said in the email to ref us ese where where hubbys hep b wont cause rejection

2 months later i get phone call on the day of my appointment by the consultant saying my ivf ref was sent

to the new clinic and has been rejected and it was sent a while a go??????? isaid when did u send it - a while ago she said

why was it rejected - dont know maybe becuz finding has stopped she says.

OMG I WAS GONNA PASS OUT.

i had saw a different consultant in may and funding was paused in june which i only came to know now. i was told 2 week ago actually funding has stopped all to gather. by the consultant on the day off app via phone call. and to get this time off for app me and hubby had to bend over backwards.

From MAY - 16 Nov 2017 i had no clue about funding being pasued and nly found out on the day of my latest app on 17 no that funding is stopped.

Consulatnt says on the phone when she called me on the day of app that they will resend my ivf application.

Guess what guys. i call this new clinic that my consultant ref me to a "while ago" to ask if i was actually ref or i was being told lies. well surprise surprise

The new clinic did not at any point receive my ivf ref. so i was lied to and the new clinic confirmed this by email to. so my consultant lied that she has already ref me and it was rejected.

Sine 17 November tell 29 nov 17 i have been trying to find out whats going on i phone the reception at the clinic the receptionist says call secretary i call secretary i get told call reception i call reception i get told i need to speak to my consultant who is in clinic every time i phone n cant talk so call secretary. i call secretary she says call nurse becuz nurse deals with ivf application. and surprise suprise the consultant doesnt deal with ivf.

Finally after 2 days of calling leaving voice mails i get through to nurse on 28 nov. She says i have never been ref before for ivf and this is my first time and my ivf application is in progress of being completed as my nurse is on holiday and will do when shes back i explain what has happened to me. the nurse questions me who told me that my application for ivf was sent before i said the consultant.

Nurse says well the cut off line for sending away the ivf ref is 15 dec and i and hubby still need to do more tests. it was lucy i was on my period becuz i had to do fsh and lh blood work. but i did the blood today which is cd 4 but i think im supposed to them on cd 3 but on cd 3 i founf really late that i had to do more blood work and i could not make it in time as pathology lab shuts early. and i had just finished work.

anyways me and hubby did the blood work today i did the fsh and lh today and rubella and chylemedia. im on cd 4 so idont know if doing the fsh and lh on cd day 4 rather 3 would make a differance to the results

If i had not been kept calling the nurse i would have not found out that i and hubby still need to do blood work and that the cut f date is 15 dec i would have missed the c=cut of line and we could be back to square one.

From May when i saw a diff consultant to 17 November when i actually spoke to my own consultant no one at any point mentioned about pause in funding. funding stopped whats happening with my ivf application so from may tell 17 november no communication at all no letters no email.

I m still being ref for ivf becuz i was asked to produce letters for my hubby ffrom his dr to make sure his oky to ahead fr ivf . which were all given to the consultant back in june and i was on the agenda of having ivf and was ready to start the tests for ivf but could not becuz the consulatnt i saw in may still needed to speak to my consultant and i had to wait almost 6 months to see my own consultant. iletters from may and june also statethat the consultants are going to offer ivf if meet the critera. so between may 2017 and befre funding was stopped i was ready for. ivf but i could do anything as i had to wait 6 months between app

sorry for the long story

I want to complain but nervous becuz i dont want this to effect my application we are so close being ref.

Any advice guys

Thanks for reading my post and will look forward to your response

lotsssss love xxx

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25 Replies
Amanda86 profile image
Amanda86

Oh dear, this is absolutely horrendous.

I would 100% complain if I were you.

In your complaint I'd include all evidence you have of the incorrect and untrue information you've been given.

Only with your persistence did you get to the bottom of this, had you not continued to chase up the clinic you's would have missed the cut off and like you say been back at square one and this isn't acceptable.

Good luck, hope you get it all sorted xxx

Phoebenooby profile image
Phoebenooby in reply toAmanda86

My friend was kept hanging on by her local GP before being referred for IVF. By the time she was she was too old! The GP wrongly thought because the national guideline is 40 she was ok at 35,: when it is actually 34 in Oxford !! She funded 6 cycles herself but never actually fell pregnant. I hope you get something sorted.

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply toPhoebenooby

Thanks for your reply. How bad is that honestly . I feel like saying really how i feel about some of these professionals. This is not fair not right. and i will get justice i wont give up. Thanks honey for your reply

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply toAmanda86

Thanks for your reply and support. Now ithink about it me complaining should not effect anything and how i m treated after this or how the referral is treated. This is wrong no questions about. Thanks so much for your support. I have evry detail the dates the times the phone calls the letters the emails to show exactly who and when and what was said. Thanks honey.xxx

Amanda86 profile image
Amanda86 in reply tobibi_16

Good luck 🙂 Xxx

Phoebenooby profile image
Phoebenooby in reply tobibi_16

Good luck xx

godsbaby profile image
godsbaby

I too have put an a complain, do not give up things have to change, off to work will reply more later

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply togodsbaby

Thanks for your reply. I m looking forward to your reply.

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply togodsbaby

I have finished typing the complain but finishing it difficult to express how i feel about all this in words. xx

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16

Hi everyone i have finished writing the complain. However i am really struggling to express how i fell and how i felt when this was happening. I know what iwanna say but m finding it hard to put my feelings in words.. Thanks everyone .xx

godsbaby profile image
godsbaby

I have put a reply in remember there response it not going to be saying they were in the wrong, but never give up justice for woman

godsbaby profile image
godsbaby in reply togodsbaby

Just for you first of all, they are playing with womans lives families , it needs to be stopped

amandagrey profile image
amandagrey

Hi there. That sounds so disturbing. Infertility treatments are no easy thing. They can be so emotionally taxing. I am so greatful, my journey was a lot smoother. I opted for surrogacy instead of IVF. Moreover, I decided that I wanted to do it in a country where the laws are easier. The requirements are too high in the UK and USA. You have to jump through so many hoops. Just like you experienced. I went to BioTexCom in Ukraine. The clinic handled my case in quite a professional way. They guided me along the way. Answered all the questions I had. Provided a proper contract for everything to ensure transperancy etc.

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply toamandagrey

Hi amandagrey. Thanks for yur reply. If my ivf application gets rejected again then im looking abroad for treatment. I will keep BioTexCom in mind. Thanks

emilywilson profile image
emilywilson

Hi Bibi_16. So sorry to hear that. It sounds like you went through an awful lot. Your consultant should have kept you in the loop. The communication gap was solely on their part. If you hadn't asked for updates, you might still have been waiting to be referred. That is just awful. As far as infertility treatments are concerned, time is of the essence. Such attitudecost you a lot of time. You should definitely complain. I would too if I was in your place. I hope they manage to clean up their act. They shouldn't continue playing with people like that. Stay strong. Looking forward to an update soon.

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply toemilywilson

Hey emilywilson. Your right they need to change their attitude. I spoke to my husband n told him that i have finished writting the complaint. He said better to wait and not send it because we are so close to being referred for treatment. He is worried that we will be treated differently which should not happen .he said wait and see what happenes with the ivf referral and then see where we are at and then complain. Its a shame that this does happen people do get treated differently after the complaints however its not the case al of the time. I hope things go smoothly from now but i will keep u guys updated. thanks for your support.means alottttttttttttttttttttttt.xxx

lily96 profile image
lily96

Hi Bibi. I'm sorry you had to go through all that. IVF is an emotional time. Such an attitude only makes it worse. You are brave for going through that. Now, I think you need to be brave for a little while longer. I would recommend complaining. Make sure that the matter is looked into. Quite often a lot of complaints are just buried to save embarassment. Yo will need to do regular follow ups. Don't give up. I hope you manage to make a difference. Good luck. Let me know if I can help in any way. Much love and support for you.

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply tolily96

Hey lily thanks for the reply. I have been calling up for updates about some blood work and no one is answering the phone. there is no point contacting the secretary as she wiill only say "i dont know". I will not give up on this. iwill complin but just scared that it doesnt effect out ivf referral which we are so close to. I will give an update soon. Ithink it will be after christmas before i hear anything. dont know how long it will take from being ref for ivf to actullay starting treatment or 1 st appointment. Thanks alot fo your support. xxx

Leah254 profile image
Leah254

Hi there. I am so sorry to hear that. It sure sounds shady. Especially the part about the pause in funding. If the funding stops, they need to give you a valid reason. If they don't, then you can assume that something is wrong. In such a case, you should complain. This might not help you much. However, it might help others. By bringing this situation into notice, you make it harder for other patients to be treated as such. Apart from this, there is another reason you should complain. The rejection might reflect negatively on your new referal. So, a complaint will show the other side of the story. I would suggest getting legal help on the matter too. Good luck!

bibi_16 profile image
bibi_16 in reply toLeah254

Hi Leah thanks for your reply. Sory abit confused about rejection of my original ivf application might impact my new ivf referral. My consultant did she she ref me originally for ivf a while ago but i doubled checked by caling the place she referred me to and they said that they didnt receive anything fro me so it looks like this is the first time im being referred for ivf. Its a god idea to get legal help but i dont know where to start or how doi go about dooing that. Thnaks leah for your support. xxxx

Leah254 profile image
Leah254

Hey dear, I seriously can feel that your patience will be like a ticking time bomb. However, just relax dear and calm yourself up. Sometimes these professionals don’t care a pinch about their patients feelings. What the patient is going through? How important this is for them is not at at all their concerned. It’s a sad reality dear, but it’s true. Through my Infertility treatment I have experienced this type of attitude plenty of time. They don’t seem to care about the pain which we TTc Mom are in. Each and every minute is difficult for us. Either we are going through the treatment or waiting for the result. Thus just try to pen down your feelings. Write a complain because it has to stop somewhere. We all ladies are her to support you. This careless attitude needs to come to a dead lock. Wish you best of luck dear. Hope everything goes well for you.

karinacollin profile image
karinacollin

. Hi there, first of all don't get nervous at all its completely fine, You are at the age where you are having this is a great blessing for you but you seemed worried, Just keep yourself calm because it has a high rate of success and it is process that is not new and many women used it and can tell you about its pros, It's not just as good with its high success rate but also it has a very successful procedure for diagnosing the basic problems of fertilization and not even that when you've been stimulated IVF than you can store your unused embryos in case of retry or anything like that, so it's a great process, way to go, You are going to be just fine. You did the right thing by doing this. It helps other people allot when they consult clinics your story would be helpful for them and that's all and when you see the baby, it's just going to worth it.

stacy_evergreen profile image
stacy_evergreen

Hey bibi! I feel really sorry for you. I do not why clinics do such things. We are already going through such a difficult time and they still do such things. Obviously they are responsible for your rejection. They just care for their money. It is good that you have shown their real face. At the moment you should not do anything. It is not the right time. If you think that it will hurt your profile, then wait. After you have your IVF done, then go after them. They should also pay the price for it. So they do not do anything wrong again. My wishes and prayers are with you. All the best for your IVF. Stay blessed.

mayastone profile image
mayastone

Hey there! I am exceptionally sad about your IVF issue. It is absolutely the blame of your center. They ought to have made the plans before for you. They ought to have likewise connected before for your first IVF cycle. Because of moderate and late handling your IVF cycle was rejected. For now overlook the majority of this. Simply concentrate on your coming IVF cycle. When you are effectively finished with it, at that point grumble for the facility. Griping right now may hurt your profile and you may lose this possibility too. So be somewhat tolerant. I trust you are fruitful in this endeavor. My petitions and wishes are with you. All the best Melisa!

jennaworks profile image
jennaworks

Oh dear! I am very sorry about your IVF issue. It is totally the fault of your clinic. They should have made the arrangements earlier for you. They should have also applied earlier for your first IVF cycle. Due to slow and late processing your IVF cycle was rejected. For the time being forget all of this. Just focus on your coming IVF cycle. Once you are successfully done with it, then complain for the clinic. Complaining at the moment might hurt your profile and you might lose this chance also. So be a bit patient. I hope you are successful in this attempt. My prayers and wishes are with you. All the best Melisa!

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