Trying to conceive at 40 with donor sperm using DIY 'AI'

[Vixmarts]

Hi, new here and feeling lost, lonely and confused. I'm desperate for a baby, and I hate myself for feeling so 'desperate'. I have so many feelings, anger, confusion, fear and guilt. I have been exploring my options since turning 40 and a good friend of mine has agreed to help me on my quest to conceive by giving me donations which I have been using via the DIY at home insemination kits. It will be nearly a year and nothing is happening.

I have been to the GP and started having some investigations. My donor has also agreed to get some initial tests done, i.e. sperm analysis. So far I have had an ultrasound (due to having progressively painful and heavy periods over the years) and that has confirmed that I have two small fibroids (the lady sonographer said that they are 'small' and 'should be nothing to worry about'). I have had all the blood tests and my donor has had his sperm test and we have been referred to a consultant at the local hospital.

The results from the sperm test are worrying and he has been asked to produce another sample. The letter says that the result has shown, 'suboptimal with low normal forms, motility and total counts'...

This does not look good...

Also I am not sure about me. I am not sure if having the fibroids will affect anything and whether there is also a problem with me. I have regular cycles, (every 29-31 days). The one thing that I have noticed over the last few years that I notice when I get EWCM. Over the past year or so, it has become noticeably darker (dark brown) which just looks wrong. This weekend I had all the usual ovulatory signs, like twinges and the ewcm streaked with brown. Then I went for a run yesterday and came back to absolute agony in my left groin. It felt like ovulation pain but much much worse. When I went to the loo I had quite a bit of ewcm but this time is was streaked with bright red and pink.

I hardly slept all night with the pain and it finally eased this morning after taking some aspirin, but I still feel really bruise. What could this be? An exceptionally weird ovulation, or do I have a cyst perhaps which has ruptured. Dr Google has a lot to answer for!

Just wondering if there is anyone else out there who is having similar experiences or has any information that sounds similar to this?

Vix

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi Vixmarts. Well, if you are to continue with DIY DI, then maybe you need to consider a different donor, should his second analysis prove to be poor too, unless you consider IVF. Your heavy periods are probably due to your fibroids, but often shouldn't prevent pregnancy if they are small. You need to have your blood hormones checked, if not already done so, and if you continue self inseminating, then perhaps your tubes need to be checked with an HSG procedure to see if they are open. I hope that everything will be OK for you to carry on, and of course successfully. Diane