Completely new!

Hi all,

I just wanted to introduce myself as I have spent the last two years trawling forums for pregnancy symptoms without ever having the guts to join one myself so thought it was about time!

I'm sure so many of you will understand the long, painful, frustrating journey I am on so thought it would be nice to have some people to go through it with. Some friends are sympathetic but are not in this boat with me now so it's hard for them to understand.

My husband and I have had the most difficult two years and that was before the issues around fertility came up as an added kick while we were down! So not being able to get pregnant has really taken its toll on our relationship.

We have finally started our first round of treatment after discovering he has slightly low sperm quality, I have low progesterone and low egg reserves. Now we are receiving some help I feel slightly more optimistic but still worried my time is running out.

Still trying to be positive and so I would love to hear any advice from people who have been through IVF or ICSI or who are in the same boat as me going through the treatment process now.

Positive thoughts to everyone x

25 Replies

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  • Welcome. I'm sorry I can't offer any advice as I am new here and just starting IVF/ICSI. There are lots of great people on here who are very knowledgeable and also very inspiring with their stories. Just wanted to wish you the best of luck. 🍀 I look forward to following your journey and hoping to hear your success story xx

  • Ah thank you so much for the reply. Where are you in your journey? I started my tablets and nasal spray this week so just getting going. A bit nervous about the emotional and hormonal affect it may have (not sure my husband can cope with much more emotion!)

    Good luck to you too xx

  • Thank you. TTC for 2 years with unexplained fertility. Waiting for day 1 of my cycle then I have to call the clinic who will arrange my for my drugs to be delivered. I'm on the long protocol because that's just the one they find works best for their particular clinic. My cycles are very regular at 26 days so should be calling them Friday to get going. I'm excited at the moment but also apprehensive at what to expect once I am on the drugs. Xx

  • Ah that sounds so similar to me, I was so relieved when I felt something was finally happening. Not long for you now.

    I had to wait for day 1 to call the clinic and my body decided to play one last game and I came on five days late which has never ever happened before! I went on holiday for two weeks that day and came back just in time to meet the nurse and have my drugs delivered to start all on the day I got back! This is such a rollercoaster!

    Can I just ask what you mean by long protocol? I'm not sure of the difference?

    I'm six days in now and I still feel fine, I don't know if that's a good thing or not! And I'm expecting to feel something more once the injections start xx

  • I don't know as much as some of the ladies on here so if I am wrong I hope someone may correct me but long protocol involves down regulation drugs and short goes straight to stimulating drugs. Every clinic is different and it involves many factors such as ovarian reserve, age etc.

    That must of been such a stressful time for you over those 5 days. Life is cruel sometimes. I have been half expecting something similar to happen! Xx

  • This forum is a very supportive place. I have just completed first cycle of IVF .... I cannot compare the emotion to anything else. Wishing you all the luck in the world x

  • Ah thank you KellyMB, it's so helpful to know there are people who really do understand. How did you find the process? Did you feel out of control with emotions?

    Sending you all the luck in the world xx

  • Welcome to the forum, I'm just about to go for ET for my 4th cycle (2nd fresh) and I honestly couldn't of got through this cycle without the support from everyone on here. It's definitely an emotional rollercoaster of a journey but try to take each day as it comes. It can be easy to look to far ahead and IVF quite quickly can take over your life, I would say try and have small things to look forward to along the way even if it's going out for a meal or a walk. Wishing you lots of luck xx

  • Thank you so much for your reply and for the advice. I can see how even when we try so hard not to, IVF can so easily become all we think about. I feel like I've become so detached from real life and have nothing worthwhile to offer friends anymore, probably because I'm trying hard not to be negative and complain about infertility, when really that's all I can think about. It's so isolating sometimes.

    I really wish you all the luck for this cycle xxx

  • It definitely is hard but hopefully having this forum and people to talk to who 'get it' will help. How far into treatment are you? X

  • Sorry, I just realised I didn't reply.

    I started last Tuesday so have been taking the tablets for five days and the nasal spray for three days. I guess I'm due a bleed any time now. I'm trying to eat healthily and exercise a bit but really want to just sit and feel sorry for myself a bit too!

    When is your ET? X

  • That's understandable we all have them days where we're positive and then the next it's the opposite.

    I had 1 embryo transferred yesterday so now in the dreaded 2ww x

  • Oh wow, good news that they were able to transfer an embryo. I have everything crossed for you that this is your time. Try and keep busy for the next two weeks! X

  • Welcome! Sounds like you and your husband have had a rough couple of years, I'm really sorry to hear that. You will get lots of support on here.

    I am due to start ICSI next Thursday. Your situation sounds quite like ours - my husband has low sperm count and motility and I also have very low egg reserves (along with one tube and endo 😬). It is positive that you are getting the help you need and the ball is now rolling for you. How are you finding the treatment so far?

    Wishing you the best of luck with everything. Xx

  • Ah thank you, already I'm so glad I signed up to this site. Our rough patch started when two days before our wedding my husbands Dad passed away. It was the most difficult thing I have ever gone through. My step mum then started chemotherapy the day after the wedding and I then found a lump in my breast! We joked at the time that you really couldn't write a story like that! I was fine physically in the end but we went into a state of grief, shock and life was a haze for a long time. So no wonder we weren't getting pregnant! I felt my hormones were all over the place but no one really seemed to understand that I was struggling too.

    Fast forward two years and here we are, finally accepting all that happened and just starting fertility treatment so I'm trying to be positive and keep focussed on that little glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel. (I hope you don't mind hearing my life story, it's actually nice to get it out! So many times I wanted to shout how unfair everything was!).

    Your situation does sound similar to ours. So is this your first cycle of ICSI? Have you received your drugs yet? I haven't felt any side effects yet but I've only had the spray for two days so I'm kind of expecting to feel something from that soon. And just trying to take each thing as it comes, there's no controlling it (and I like to be in control normally!)

    Good luck with your cycle, I really hope you get a positive outcome x

  • Thanks for sharing your story with me. I'm so sorry Franco81, it sounds like you and your husband have had a devastating few years. You sound like you are a very brave and positive person and you're right about taking things a day at a time. I hope this is your time.

    Yes, this is my first ICSI cycle. My husband and I have been ttc for a couple of years. Found out my husband had low count and motility and the chances of natural conception were very low so we were referred for ICSI. By some miracle I fell pregnant in February, by April I discovered I was having an ectopic pregnancy which ruptured and my tube was removed. Also discovered I had endo during my surgery. Then fast forward our ICSI planning appointment and we were told my egg reserve was very low, 4.7. Felt pretty devastated but have dusted ourselves off and we are ready for this new chapter. Like you say, whilst that little bit of light is glimmering there is always hope.

    Keep us posted with how you are getting on. Sending you so much positivity. You can do this! Xx

  • Ah thank you so much, positive thoughts to you too, let's hope this is the help we both need.

    Im sorry to hear all you've been through, it must have been such a difficult time for you both.

    I've found that fertility can be such a minefield and just when you think you get your head round one thing, something else is thrown your way. I've spent so long wishing to be one of those people blissfully unaware of how hard it can be to conceive! But I've slowly realised it doesn't help thinking like that. It's been a slow process though and I'm not sure I'm always that brave or positive!

    Fingers crossed for us both for the future now though, keep me posted on how you're getting on x

  • Hello. I can't give much advice as I'm still going through investigations to work out what's wrong (if anything) so not at the treatment stage yet. But just thought I'd welcome you as some of what you said sounds very familiar to how I'm feeling. I only just joined this forum and have already found so many kind understanding people which, when you feel you have no one around you who understands how you're feeling, is such a help. I hope you find the forum helpful and all the best with starting your treatment. Fingers and toes crossed for you!

  • Thank you so much, and good luck to you too. I hope it all works out for you either naturally or with a little help.

    I have found the waiting and constant disappointment so hard, so I'm glad you are having investigations now, just to know what's going on in there can really help x

  • Hello and welcome! The forum has been great for me, you feel so alone (especially as we haven't told anyone) so coming here for advice or just to vent is positive. I hope your journey smooths out...but don't forget, a smooth sea never made a skilful sailor 💙🛶

  • I love that! Thank you.

    I can't believe how many people have replied already, like you said it's lovely to be able to share how you feel with people who understand. I've read so many posts where people feel guilty for the emotions infertility has brought out so to know it's normal really helps.

    Good luck with your journey x

  • I read that quote in a magazine and it's really stuck, probably because I love the sea so much! It's an improvement on the old "what doesn't kill you..." which makes me want to scream!! I'd recommend a book called "get a life, a couples guide to infertility", too. It's got my scribbles, notes, highlights...took it to all my appointments and refer to it when needed 💙

  • I'll have a look at that book, thanks for that.

    I've just bought Zita West Guide to Fertility and Assisted conception but I think I should have got it before I actually started treatment!

  • I love that quote too! So lovely and so true too!

  • Hi Franco81, lovely to have you on board - I am on my 3rd cycle of IVF after 3 years of TTC and a difficult year this year. We have 'unexplained infertility' however my acupuncturist said my progesterone level was on the lower side and so is my AMH (even though the clinic call both satisfactory so not an issue as far as they concerned). I'm not a big responder to IVF and even on the higher dosage of stims last time only got a handful of eggs but it's quality not quantity as they say!! I think you'll really find the support on here amazing xx

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