Please help me!

Hey everyone, I'm so confused right now all alone the nurse said if we had 3 good embryos we would have 2 transferred and if there was more we'd have 1 transferred. This morning we got told if we wanted we could have 2 transferred well since being told this my brain has been doing over time all day to the point I feel so stressed out. I'm sorry if I sound selfish but I just can't decide xx

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  • Hi, it's a really difficult decision to make. My first cycle I had 1 transferred and it failed, the subsequent 2 frozen cycles I had 2 transferred each time and they still failed. All really good quality embryos. For me that makes it easy to always choose 2 from now on to give us a slightly better chance of success. The cycle i'm going through now I will have a better chance than my other ones as my cervix issue has been solved which means a straight forward transfer is now possible. Even knowing that this is a much better chance I still want to transfer 2 if possible when we get to that stage, and hopefully 2 good quality embryos as well. I would make the decision based on previous success or failure, embryo grade and whether you are prepared for the possibility of twins. Yes twins is a higher risk pregnancy with more possibility of complications but on the other hand women give birth to healthy twins everyday. Could you go off work early and bed rest if that was a Dr's advice if you were pregnant with twins? I think about all these things. For me I would be elated if I found out we were pregnant with twins. I think you just need to think of all the possibilities and figure out what is best for you and your partner. Good luck in your decision making. Wishing you all the best with all of it xxx

  • From what you've said I'm gathering that if you have 1 brilliant embryo then they only want to encourage you to transfer 1. If you have 2 lesser quality then it would be ok to transfer 2. I think I said earlier as did Tugsgirl that the guidance for younger ladies is 1 good embryo. I think if you've decided for sure on 2 then they may accept your decision! Good luck!!xx

  • Hey, oh this really is such a tough decision..I was only allowed 1 embryo transferred on my fresh cycle , I did fall pregnant but sadly miscarried. Ive since had 2 FET cycles and transferred 2 embryos each time but both were unsuccessful.

    Like it's been said you'd need to consider the chance of twins, good luck for whatever you do decide xx

  • During my first cycle - aged 34 - the hospital said upfront they'd put two back to increase the chances (I assume because of my egg quality). They explained that the option was usually one. For a number of health/risk reasons.

    This time we had two - not because of quality but because it's standard at my clinic.

    Did you ask why at all? I think if you knew why they were suggesting it then it might help? Sorry you're in a pickle xx

  • Hi there. Not sure if this will help or hinder but it's another perspective. I did 5 cycles with the top two fertility clinics in Sydney. Both clinics always advised I should only transfer one embryo, that advice always stood no matter how many eggs successfully fertilised. Unfortunately, we never got any embryos to grow past day 3 & elected to have a 3dt on our last cycle as a last ditch hope for a miracle but that didn't work either. Their view wasn't the classic '2 will give you more chance' - it was more the feeling that 2 will only give you more chance if they're both viable embryos that will continue to develop. They only suggested I could transfer 2 on my last cycle of I wanted it that suggestion was basically the last desperate attempt on their behalf to keep trying with me. We all kind of knew it was pointless. Even at that stage I still only chose one embryo as I felt better to try and give that one the best chance. I left the second one to go to day 5 but unfortunately it didn't make it. There has only been one consultant in Sydney (& ive seen 4 fertility consultants) who advised transferring 2 because I was 40, but it just came across as 'there's not much hope so I'd just do 2 if I were you' I didn't like her attitude and didn't take her advice.

    Obviously your decision. If 2 good embryos are put back, twins are a real option. Being a twin myself I know it was very very hard work for my mum!! But I still appreciate 2 is better than none.

    I think if you're planning to try IVF a few times (which is often the case as lots of people don't have success first time around) then I'd stick with one transfer for now but that is just my feeling. Obviously a v personal decision.

    I was also very wary as I have bad endometriosis & chronic fatigue & was concerned how I could cope with 2 babies at the same time with my illness.

    Good luck with your decision, it's never easy and clinics are hopeless at giving decent guidance half the time leaving us in utter turmoil!! X

  • Thank you all for your replays and your story's I really appreciate it we are going in a while so will update after but I think we've made our mind up 👏🏻👏🏻 xxx

  • Exciting! Glad you got to a decision xx

  • Hey... When i had mine the other week I was told like u I would have one put back in but because mg egg quality decresed from a reakly good egg to average on the day they were putting tbem bk the said cause they were average did i want the 2 put back so initially I had the 2 put bk in and had a BFN...i think u have more of a success rate with 2 put bk but it's up to u if u want 2 babies lol instead of one cause they could both work I would personally be landed with 2 😁 xx

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