13dp 5dfet, bfp two days ago on 11dp but getting obsessed. Test attached 14dp

13dp 5dfet, bfp two days ago on 11dp but getting obsessed. Test attached 14dp

I found a pregnancy test in my underwear drawer. Guess what I'll be doing first thing in the morning?? I just can't stop worrying that's it's all too good to be true. I need to see that second line again. I've promised myself I'll step away from the tests (I won't go out and buy one) and maybe even google too, after tomorrow, at least until I have my 6 week scan and then maybe I'll relax a bit more anyway. I didn't want to obsess, I don't want to be this person but it looks like it's happening anyway πŸ˜• X

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  • Hey Tugsgirl sending you a big hug xxx If you want to see that double line again girl then you for it and enjoy:))) I hope all goes well with your scan, its an exciting time xxx Baby dust πŸŽ‡πŸŽ†

  • Aww thank you. I know I must sound so ungrateful and I'm not I'm just finding it really hard to relax and be happy because I'm too worried something could go wrong xx

  • Your not coming across that way at all. Its totally normal to be anxious at all stages. This journey i find is like being in a dark room and all your senses are super sensitive because you cant see your way. The uncertainty is almost deafening but thats why I love this forum, its like a candle in the dark where we can get light from those around us. You are lighting the way for others like me. Im hoping to get to your stage and am hoping to hear more about how youre doing so I can get an idea of what to expect. Does that make sense? Keep sparkling Tugsgirl and sending you and your little one loads of baby dust πŸŽ‡πŸŽ†πŸŽ‡

  • what a beautiful way to describe this challenging journey - you have a lovely way with words 😊

  • Thank you so much. I was afraid of coming across as being ungrateful after getting the Holy Grail of a bfp but I'm relieved by your words. I think because we've all struggled so it makes it that much harder to enjoy our pregnancies like "normal" women. We are so afraid after all our ups and downs, our heartache to finally believe we can have our happy endings. Thank you 😊 X

  • In the same boat 🚣🏽 πŸ™ˆπŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€— im trying to do the Test Friday as is our official test day but I've lost control and it looks like tomorrow will be our official test... we've waited too long for this day... need to see those lines again, doesn't feel real πŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ŒπŸΌπŸ™ŒπŸΌπŸ™ŒπŸΌall the best my Cycle Buddy πŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™πŸΌπŸ™ƒπŸ€—β€οΈ

  • You too! πŸ€πŸ€πŸ€ x

  • Aw hun, I fully understand. I was exactly the same after our bfp last year. My partner couldn't understand that now I was finally pregnant why I couldn't just be happy about it!

    The fact is that for years we desperately maternal creatures have researched and devoured every book, forum and site, we've come to understand the game of hurdles, we've been pin cushions, our bodies and emotions have been through so much that it's hard to believe we've finally made it to our destination.

    I for one envy women who get pregnant naturally for their ability to casually accept that they're pregnant and see the next hurdle as a 9 month distant labour, it must be so liberating!

    It does feel wonderful to enjoy feeling pregnant once you've fought the worry demons away though. Hope you're able to do this and you can indulge in every precious moment as the wonderful pregnant person you are! I'm sure you'll get there but in the meantime huni do whatever it takes to keep you sane until very soon you see that miraculous heart beat on the screen. Xx 😊

  • Aww thank you for your words. I'm just so terrified that it could all be taken away from me that I can't relax and enjoy it. I keep thinking I'll feel better after the 6 week scan but then I know I'll be worrying about the 12 weeks scan but maybe after that I can relax a bit. And they say stress isn't good for pregnant women! Xx

  • Hun, I fully understand. I think it's just part of the territory with ivf to have some level of worry. I hope that after each scan some of your concern is alleviated and by 13 weeks you'll be a fully fledged believer! Xx

  • Hun if you could see this huge pot in my kitchen uou laugh your head off. It's FULL of + tests. I was doing them at 20 weeks 😱Until DH caught wind and made me count them and worked outbwenhad spent similar on a weekend at haven with the kids.. then when I went cold turkey with the Prego tests I moved Over to digital OPK when i raised I got a smiley face on the dual hormone tests 😁

    Don't think that urge ever goes away!

    If it makes you feel better, do it!!

    Just be careful though if your scrutinizing lines, because I think at something like week 9 your Hcg plateau's so won't get any darker on tests. That was something else that freaked me out.


    Good luck xxxx😘

  • Thank you. I'm just a bit worried about getting all obsessed over it when I should just be happy and grateful, which I am but also like you I just want to keep checking. I caved and did the test and keep thinking it could be a darker line but it is a darker line than my positive from the clinic so I'm telling myself it's all good! Roll on my 6 week scan!! Just hoping I don't go out and buy more tests.. xx

  • In my options this is completely normal - I think I did about 10 tests while waiting for my first scan. I only stopped because at about 5 weeks I did a digital clearblue test with weeks indicator and it told me I was only 1-2 weeks pregnant. I went into a mad spin thinking something was wrong and my husband banned me from doing any more tests. All was fine though and I am now 22 weeks pregnant. Take care xx

  • That's what I'm afraid of lol πŸ˜‚ So pleased your pregnancy is going well 😊 X

  • It is natural after trying so long. I did 3 initially, then another one a couple of days later. I found myself picking more up in the supermarket, but as I had forgotten my purse had to put them back 😁. I have one more that I have saved for Monday as that is the day I will need to phone the hospital and cancel my IVF... it is taking a lot of will power to not use it xx

  • Test away😊😊having never seen two lines in my life I would be tempted to frame the damn things 😊😊😊I hate that we are robbed in some way of the ability to relax and enjoy pregnancy but hopefully you can soon. ..hugs xxxx

  • That's exactly how it feels, like we're robbed of the joy of it! I did my test and phew! Two blue lines! One is still ever so slightly lighter than the other but only slightly (I think it's stronger than the one I took from the clinic, see? Still fretting but now over the COLOUR of the lines!) Despite shaking like a leaf doing it, it's all good 😊 πŸ‘πŸ» πŸ™πŸ» πŸ’ͺ🏻 Xx

  • Yipee. .congrats again..hope you feel better now..you back to work today too right? So just take it easy. .precious cargo on board xxxx

  • Yep back to work πŸ˜• Wish I could just stay at home with my OH but things are getting pretty tight and we'll need the money lol. I will be sensible xx

  • Aw Tugsgirl it's so normal to feel anxious that it's all going to be taken away after all we've been through to get there, you're not ungrateful at all. I always say I don't want to be that person too but I'm powerless to stop it πŸ™ˆ

    So much luck for a continued healthy pregnancy xx

  • Totally understand this. When I got my second BFP I told a friend I found that more terrifying than a BFN. They didn't understand but I still stand by feeling that way...probably for longer than I care to admit.

    Don't stress or berate yourself for any positive or negative feelings and try to ride them all out. Be kind to yourself and if some happiness/joy appears then enjoy it and try not to push it away.

    Keep moving forwards one step at a time and congratulations xx

  • Thank you ladies. I honestly don't know what I'd do without you all 😊 Xx

  • Its quite natural to keep testing becuz of the wait u have had to endure and now finally its here and ur eyes just wont believe it. I dont blame u for testing again n again n again. Its just satisfying to keep seeing 2lines when u do the test .xxx

  • It doesn't help that my uterus still feels heavier, a bit like a milder version of pmt. I truly got really nervous taking this test again this morning. So relieved to see those two lines πŸ™πŸ» Xx

  • Yay, so pleased for you!! How amazing!! X

  • Hi Tugsgirl. Well it does look a strong result, so fingers crossed all is still well on the official test day. Thinking of you. Diane

  • My official test day was Sunday just gone.. this is my second test. You think it looks ok? πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ X

  • Hi Tugsgirl. Oh great! It looks fine to me, so get that scan booked so you can get to meet your little "bean"! Good luck! Diane

  • It's booked πŸ‘πŸ» πŸ™‚

  • Fabulous! Diane xx

  • We all feel like this so it's understandable x congratulations xx

  • Thank you x

  • I completely understand why you'd want to test over and over, I think we would all be like that. If it makes you feel better then do it. Lots of love x

  • Aww I'm so pleased for you and it's only natural for you to worry I did more than one lol you just can't help it and the worrying doesn't stop once a you have had your scan either lol :) xxx

  • How are you doing? Xx

  • I'm not too bad got terrible sickness though all day everything is such a struggle lol I'm constantly tired too haha at least it's a good sign it's working I guess lol just want the first trimester to be over and hopefully the sickness passes. How's you? Xxx

  • I'm ok. No sickness yet. Still have light cramping. Heavy boobs, dull lower back ache and just generally really tired 😴 but apart from that I'm feeling fine xx

  • Aww good enjoy it while you can lol glad everything is ok tho when do you uhave your scan? Xxx

  • God it's sooooo hard to not obsess over whether everything is ok 😞 My scan is the 20th of March which seems a lifetime away at the moment πŸ˜• Xx

  • aww it does but it will fly by trust me. im sure everything will be ok. the nurses told me not to worry as the more you worry and think about it the less blood goes to the fetus. so try relaxing i know its easier said than done tho lol xxx

  • Oh dear really? Now I'm even more worried πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I'll try though.. I honestly thought if I ever saw two lines I'd be happy, home and dry! While I am obviously very happy, this feels worse than the tww! Xx

  • lol i know its horrible waiting to be confirmed that all is ok im sure it will be just try enjoy it. i didnt expect to feel this ill but im trying to cope and enjoy it haha. xxx

  • It must be kinda comforting in a way though? The morning sickness, as horrid as it is.. xx

  • ermmm a little but but its really horrible im just sick alll day and constantly tired lol xxxx

  • In that case I hope it eases up for you soon xx

  • Congrats Hun! Amazing lines πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜Šβ€οΈπŸ‘πŸ‘ it is tough this early part but u will get there, keep testing if it helps just do whatever to get you through xx can't wait to see your scan pic! Try to enjoy it Hun xx

  • I can't wait to see it either πŸ™πŸ»πŸ™πŸ»πŸ™πŸ» Xx

  • If it reassures u while waiting the scan, why not?! Uv waited long enuf for this so if u need to see those lines, do it!! I should think I would be exactly the same!! xxx

  • Congratulations :-) :-) :-). My nurse told me if the lines are clearly visible and strong then your chances are that all is well and your HCG levels are good. With that said she also said if lines are weak, don't panic it should get stronger each time you test. Yours look perfect...

  • My first test Sunday from the clinic was pink dye and one line was lighter. But it was definitely a positive (I posted it on Sunday) With this one, although its blue I think the line has got darker.. that's what I'm obsessing over now though; whether if I keep testing the lines will continue to get darker. Such a fretful time πŸ˜• X

  • I know the feeling all to well. Just relax and let nature work its wonders. Thinking of you and cant wait to hear the progress :-)

  • Oh dear. I found a whole bunch of internet cheapies from when we were ttc naturally that I forgot I had so now I have an unlimited supply of tests. Just did another one and test still looks good 😊 I've only done 3 so far though lol πŸ˜‚ x

  • Lol, just take it easy, try to relax and enjoy. When do you do blood test?

  • I don't know? My six week scan? πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ (Monday 20th)

  • I know it can't come soon enough. We have ours done here on day 15 of 2ww. Then the HCG levels are monitored for a few days.

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