Trying for a baby: Hi everyone! My name... - Fertility Network UK

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Trying for a baby

monbaby profile image
18 Replies

Hi everyone! My name is Monica, I am from South Carolina. I’m here for advice. Just a couple of years ago I was diagnosed with PCOS. I had clomide with metformin. I went through 3 unsuccessful iui cycles and 4 of ivf. I was praying to eventually get pregnant on my last cycle but that didn’t happen, so now I am really desperate. How come I cannot conceive? Just naturally as millions of women do?

Unfortunately I know exactly what is wrong with me. I’ve read so many success stories about conceiving naturally with pcos. But I guess everyone is different and we can’t rely on someone’s happiness.

At the end of my struggles I have to try one of the last options we have – surrogacy. Doctor said that for me it is almost impossible to get pregnant. Nothing is working, so he recommended me finding surrogacy clinic in US. As easy as it sounds, right? Yes, there are plenty of options in US, but look at those prices. We just can’t afford it here. That’s why I am writing on this forum.

I just need an advice.!

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monbaby
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18 Replies
monbaby profile image
monbaby

Hi! I am sorry for not relying you earlier. I would like to hear your story! What clinic did you use? Was it expensive?

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Hi! What treatment exactly did you undergo?

monbaby profile image
monbaby

I as you can see have never had an experience like this and obviously I am afraid of starting my journey to Ukraine. Will it be successful, will I get BFP, will I be satisfied with services etc. Of course it'd awesome if I had a possibility to look at the clinic and develop my own opinion on what I see etc. But even without it, how can I be sure that everything will be alright? How did you come to the conclusion that it's a great idea to fly to Ukraine? What was the moment when you felt like doing it? I mean obviously you've also had it hard as everyone and choosing the clinic isn't that easy even if we're talking about the clinic here.. I just do not want to make a mistake xx

monbaby profile image
monbaby

I'm sorry I was in a bad mood when writing you.. I've developed some form of an anxiety after everything I went through and are trying to be sure that everything will be just fine.

I've searched and have found some ads about the clinic on the internet like in magazines etc.. thanks to you :)

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Oh hun... I didn't know thing was that bad for you... Hope now you are happy!!

I too worry a lot these days, just to think about everything I went through and the things I will eventually have to overcome males me anxious.. I often asked myself why me, why I can't become a mother naturally?? There are a lot of women like us who suffer from infertility and we still do not feel ourselves completely understood...

I am glad that you've found your joy and happiness through the treatment and I am getting ready for my last fight.. Cos if not now, when?

I really hope they'll find us a surrogate mother quickly and everything will go as planned. Just to have a child, the thought of it already feels so good. :) xoxo

monbaby profile image
monbaby

What? It'll be closing? Why? Will that affect the clients there? Should I really write them or...? What do you think?

I was actually about to contact them but then life happened and I had to fly to my parents because my dad actually got ill. Thanks god it's nothing serious but I didn't find time to call the clinic and now after your notification I don’t know what to do. My dh isn't home rn and with whom to talk, I don't know..

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Yes, thank you for asking, they are fine. Though I was so nervous something had happen to them.. But luckily everything is okay!

Yes surely I'll have to wait for the surrogate mother for months maybe even a year.. Maybe we just need to wait for a bit to commence our program when they are finished with that disinfection thingy??

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Hi, KimDerr, nice to meet you here! You are right, we cannot control our nervousness at all, as if it is our only emotion. Thank you for clearing it up too. I think of signing with the clinic soon, but possibly I'll wait for it to reopen. Do not want to feel somehow hurried or something.

What tx have you undergone?? Congrats on your babies! That's amazing, you must be so happy right now! xx

KimDerr profile image
KimDerr in reply tomonbaby

sure, i'm very happy like obviously any mother in the world who waited for her mothering for so long. at times, i feel tired, sleepy and exhausted but i know that this is my ultimate happiness. my dh is more reserved still i know that he is also a happy father. i can't imagine some other choice for myself now rather than parenting. our babies were born by a surrogate using donor eggs. however, in our family life we try not to concentrate too much attention on that. they are absolutely ours and always will be

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Hmmm, for 3 months?? I am kind of shocked, I think I've read somewhere about such clinic where you get the surrogate mother in such short time...

Actually you are right, it'd be no harm if I write to the clinic and ask the managers everything I want to know! That's what I should do! I mean it'll be better if they will explain me their surrogacy system in more detailed way. Thanks for your help. xoxoxo

monbaby profile image
monbaby

But you did have to take some additional tests when in Ukraine, didn't you? You have to pass them in order to continue and if you don't then what?

Thank you!! Your words are so kind and you are so sweet!

monbaby profile image
monbaby

I never thought they are so strict, it's Ukraine and you pay the money. I thought of Ukraine as of a full of corruption country where you can pay for everything.. I am surprised honestly. It took you a lot of time to be checked again?

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Thank you for your recommendation!

Yes, I have seen the samples already but they really seem like samples, I wonder if I could add some more articles into the contract?

So you are flying in Kiev soon? Is it decided?

helleswifty profile image
helleswifty in reply tomonbaby

It's almost decided. But I am pretty sure I will be getting my tx there in Ukraine. But from what I know it's just samples, so probably you will be getting the chance to change something if you want so. But what do you want to add or delete?? I am not a professional in those kind of questions so I'll sign what they have to sign because honestly I do not know what else should I do..

monbaby profile image
monbaby

As I have been to the clinic I can confirm that it is too small to be able to receive as many clients as it does on its daily basis but fortunately when we were there for our first appt, I think that it was a really really great experience to see what country Ukraine is and how all the procedures are performed there, as I have undergone all kinds of the fertility tx before. Now as everything was taken off of me, I was just enjoying my time, we have waited only 1.5 months to be matched with the surro and I write it as it it was something casual, it's not although I am worried about that fact that I won't see the surrogate in ages.. Hope everything will be okay and we will get our bfp.

christinelove profile image
christinelove in reply tomonbaby

Congratulations! So you have already found your surrogate mother! That's amazing! I love when some of us keep updating the community on their success, it is so great that your dream is on its way to come true. Good luck to you hun!

monbaby profile image
monbaby in reply tochristinelove

Thank you! Yes, I thought about this forum recently as I haven't visited it for too long. I thought that it'd be nice if I talk about my concerns and worries here with someone I know a bit, who have advised me the clinic I am currently using. And I hope that it will work, that we will become parents.. There are so many changes in my life. I would like to share them with the world

monbaby profile image
monbaby

Yes, 1,5 months. I too can't believe it, they have also found us a donor in 2 days so now we are only waiting to get the bfp in 2-3 weeks. Whooh, I am so nervous. We also were advised that we use donor eggs once again, because the tests have shown my inability to be stimulated. That wasn't new information, but it was nice of the clinic to not just believe what is stated in my medical history but also to check it by themselves if I am able to produce my own eggs on the stimulation without the high risk of hyper stimulation.

I am really worried though.. what if I do not like the surro.. It is not like I like that fact that we didn't choose her by ourselves like we did with the donor.

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