Nearly Over

[SuzanneAM]

Went into hospital 9am Monday morning for medical management was nice that I had my own room. 10am 4 tablets taken, 2:30pm 2 tablets taken, 6:30pm 2 tablets taken, for 12 hours all I had was really bad cramp/stomach pains, heavy bleeding and clots it was so horrible just feeling the flow as you stand up, I was losing that much my body was feeling tired, sickly and light headed, I just wanted it to be over and to go home, at 9:30pm the pain was so severe and I wasn't passing anything but could feel something there like I was blocked, thought it was another clot but at 10:15pm I was looked at and they used long tweezers to remove sac and feotus that was stuck and the pain relieved. I was told to stay over so I didn't leave hospital until 11am Tuesday. My husband stayed over with me and slept on chair because they had no beds available. As I got through my door I broke down as it hit me that it's over and lost, so tired woke up this morning with pains and bleeding and just drained.

The hospital gave us some keepsakes to remember baby. Hits you so much when they ask questions about what we want to do and did we have a name, have to wait 6 weeks before can arrange burial or cremation as gone away for testing, he/she may have only been 8-9 weeks when we lost but that was our baby and I think it's hit us even more now.

I've been off work now for 2 weeks and starting to worry about my job but feel that I am not ready to go back, as I feel exhausted and my emotions are everywhere.

[Yarwoody]

Your post is heartwrenching. I have no words to ease your pain. We had a miscarriage 2years ago which passed naturally...the most horrendous and surreal experience that can not be understood unless experienced personally. I fear we have to go through this again as signs of this IVF cycle are indicating an ectopic pregnancy.

Work should be the last thing on your mind. You need time to heal physically and emotionally. Be kind to yourself xxx

[Ladyboss397]

I'm so so sorry Hun, I'm not really sure what to say but what a terrible experience for you both to be going thought I cant even imagine how u must be feeling. Give ur self time to heal and grieve, and try not to worry about work (easier said than done I know).

sending hugs xxx

[luce_26]

Oh Suzanne, I don't know what to say, what an awful time for you and your DH. I haven't been through a mc so can't begin to understand what you're going through. Give yourself as much time as you need, forget about work for the time, I'm sure everything can wait until you're ready to go back. Be kind to yourself and be glad that, for a time at least, you had a miracle growing inside you. Much love xx

[noodles_]

Oh Suzanne I just wish I could give you a big hug right now 😢💜 It must've taken a lot of courage for you to write this post. I can't even begin to imagine how you're both feeling right now but I just wanted to let you know how sorry I am and that you have us girls on the forum here for support. Have you been offered any counselling? Try not to think about work. I know we can't help ourselves but your health & wellbeing is so much more important and you need to look after No.1 right now. Sending you lots of luv & hugs 😚 x x x

[Hopeful1982]

Oh SuzanneAM, I am so sorry that you've been through this. You've clearly had a very difficult and traumatic time! Try not to worry about your job as, I doubt after all of this you will be ready to return to work at the moment. Just make sure you see your GP for the relevant sick lines. Take really good care of yourself x

[Daisy-Mae]

Dear SuzanneAM, I am so very sorry for your loss and your post is truly heartbreaking. I know we all feel utterly helpless but please know we are all thinking of you and sending so much love and support your way. I wish we could take away some of your pain. Rest and give yourself time to process all that has happened to you. Xxxxx

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi SuzanneAM. Nothing much more really to add to what the others have said. However, I had a similar experience later on in my pregnancy, many years ago now. You never forget, but time is a great healer, and you seem to have a marvelous partner there for you, which is what you need just now. Gentle hugs. Diane

[Hidden]

Thinking of you xxx

[Hidden]

So sorry for your loss,. I also had a miscarriage recently it's not nice at all to go through. Keep strong & don't give up the fight!. Love to you 💗 xxx

[Jojostayinghopeful]

Your post makes me so sad. I'm so sorry you have has to go through this horrendous ordeal. I am sending you a massive virtual hug. I hope you both can grieve together and find strength in each other to start to move forward. X x x x