Nearly time

Due to start my injections on the 25th August and am genuinely so anxious! Trying to eat as healthily as I can and not sure cutting out caffeine is doing me any favours as I can could murder a cup of tea! Any tips on a decent decaf?!

This group has been so useful, I'm coming out of a week of being incredibly down and weepy and dipping in here has made me feel less lonely. 3 close friends has announced they are 12 weeks in and it has floored me. I feel that in a years time I not only wont have a baby, but everyone else will and they will have all moved on without me. Daft. I decided to tell a few friends, but they all have kids and just keep saying it will will work and just aren't giving me the support I need. Husband has been fantastic I just know he needs to be more upset, but afraid of putting it on me. This is my first and only cycle on nhs. Pressure!

Anyway thank you to you all, just wanted to put my voice out there with yours. Wishing you all the luck in the world.

Xx

15 Replies

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  • Hello it must be exciting to be getting started (hoping I wont be to far behind you) a couple of my friends and my sister know and they all say the same it will work out, why wouldn't it etc. But I have come to the conclusion they have no idea about the world of IVF and to be fair I didn't either before all this started.

    I tend to come on here for help and support, its good to read other peoples experience and knowledge to prepare you what is to come.

    Having not yet started I cant really offer but advice apart from take each day as it comes and try and stay positive.

    GOOD LUCK XXXXXXXXX

  • I think it is exciting, you are right that a year ago I knew very little about any of this! Good luck to you, hope you're on the road soon xx

  • Hi Daisy14, chin up, and don't feel down. I know what you mean about your friends around you. My husband and I were the first one to get married around us and now we are the last ones without babies.

    Be happy for your friends that they are expecting :) I know how you feel, though. Another announcement and you're like "euuuu and what about MEEEE?"

    You need to keep positive that this will come for you and your husband eventually.

    I was told to be healthy, avoid eating too much sugar, and also take Folic Acid.

    Also, we were advised by the nurse, for my husband to take Proxeed Plus. It's pricey (£30.50 for a box of 30 and you take 2 a day) on Amazon but it has helped my husband (his sperm is low) to be a bit more active

    We are also on our first round with the NHS and reading the comments on this forum has helped me, relax on the whole thing.

    Stay positive, relax . I keep my fingers crossed for you. xxx Sending you lots of baby dust your way x

  • Thank you, it's nice to know people understand. I'm so excited for my friends, just there seems to be this elephant in the room when we get together. I am quite sure I am over sensitising it though. Keeping busy is really helpful! Lots of good luck to you too! Xx

  • Hey Hun hope ur ok? U are really not alone we are all feeling the sand but we have eachtother. I do understand what you mean about friends it's very hard when it happens to everyone eles and your still siting there waiting but keep your self carm and do this you love so your body is happy. I also only have only one shot on nhs and it's very worring but we have to give it our best shot. I am here if you wanna talk any more getting used to using this web site. Hope to hear from you soon. Lucy x

  • Thank you, I agree self care is important. Feel like I have the prepare my physical and mental strength for a really important task! Good luck to you xx

  • Yeah you do. Hope Al goes well keep me update xx

  • Aw such an exciting time for you 😊 I know exactly what you mean about the situation with your friends but you'll find great support on here as we've all been or are going through treatment in some way shape or form. Acupuncture has been a great help to me, it's helped with my stress & anxiety and it also helps improve your mood & blood flow. My acupuncturist advised me not to use decaf, she said if I want a cup of tea, have a cup of tea. You don't have to cut caffeine out altogether (although some people prefer to) 😉 There are guidelines as to how much is safe. I recommend Zita West's book 'Guide to Fertility & Assisted Conception' - one of the girls on here recommended it to me and it's so informative. I also downloaded the meditation music which really helps me switch off. Men are stronger than we think btw so focus on you and as long as you're okay he'll be okay 💙 Good luck 😙 x x

  • Thank you so much, I will check out accupuncture as you're not the first person to mention it. Good luck to you xx

  • Good luck! And we'll done telling a few friends. I did, surprisingly it was friend pregnant with her 3rd that out of the blue proved the most supportive. She was 5 months along and when we got our first positive. She cried (literally) after 6 rounds and we got our positive. Before that she randomly called to see how I was holding up, she didn't pretend to understand, but she was there for me. And then another friend out of nowhere, just started showing up and helping me around the house when round 7 was very gruelling, and then took care of me when I miscarried and spent 3 days vomiting unable to move very far.

    Your friends do care about you, and most would do anything to help you out. Sometimes you do need to ask, other times it just shows up. Fertility is something people dont want to talk about, and a lot of people don't realise how common it is.

    My hubby seemed quite nonchalant about it, even though he had to pick a sperm donor as a back up in case his operation didn't work. The first operation yielded nothing and as he was bleeding heavily, they couldn't continue. When he was still drugged out, he apologised and cried when I said they didn't find anything. Men feel, but maybe can't express themselves like us ladies. Sometimes, that might be a good thing. I wish I could compartmentalise my problems and just get on with things.

    stay strong, you're doing really well so far.

  • Thank you so much for your lovely words. Sounds like you've been through it and back, I wish you all the luck in the world x

  • Hi Daisy14, You'll find lots of support on here. Yes it is uncanny how those pregnancy announcements come at exactly the worst moments. My DH had just had his sperm retrieval operation which was quite major, and we were back home when I saw on facebook that my cousin had her baby that same day. The baby was ten days early. It hit me like a ton of bricks and I've never felt so upset before or since. Good to get it out of my system, I don't feel so bad about friends baby photos or announcements now, I think I just somehow accepted that my life is it's own story and everyone has their own battles to deal with. We don't always know how many miscarriages or health issues each women has before they get their baby.

    I found cutting out caffeine the hardest part by far. The best de-caf tea is the Yorkshire Tea one, Asda does it. Also got into a coffee substitute called no-caf , from Holland& Barratt.

    Take some quiet time every day to relax.

    All the best with your cycle, xxx

  • Thanks for the tea tips!

    It is so good be able to articulate things here that I havent been able to out loud before, feels better when not all in my head!

    Lots of luck to you x

  • Hi Daisy14 I just wanted to say I can totally relate to u, I will be starting my first and only NHS cycle and I've been so anxious I've found being on here a great help with lots of advice. And in the last few months alot of women I know or that work with my partner have announced they are pregnant, seems like everyone else if falling pregnant and u cant help but think why can't that be me!! :-(

    As for the decaf I've tried tetleys redbush tea its naturally caffeine free and I love it but its not to everyone's taste but its only £1 at asda so its cheap enough to try.

    Wishing you best of luck xx

  • Thanks for the tip, wishing you all the best with your cycle too. I go through bursts of huge excitement and it's definitely good to keep busy. The support here today has been wonderful.

    Lots of luck to you x

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