pregnancy imposter syndrome

[ClaireB24]

I went to a pregnancy yoga class this week and couldn’t shake the imposter syndrome the whole time I was there. I think part of it was that a lot of woman were well into their third trimesters and I just look I’ve had too much cake. But also when the yoga teacher kept referring to “our babies” I just felt like she couldn’t possibly be speaking to me. For those of you that are further along or on baby number 2, does that feeling ever go? Bloody infertility is such a mind f@ck!

[StarsAllAround]

Can't offer any advice just that I feel the same way, I am 10 weeks I am being sick a few times a day and yet I still don't feel like it's real not sure I ever will. Hopefully it starts feeling real for you soon and you can enjoy the miracle growing inside.

[ClaireB24 in reply to StarsAllAround]

Glad it’s not just me! Best of luck for the rest of your pregnancy, I hope the sickness passes for you soon x

[HollyT7]

I'm on baby number two and its still at the back of my mind. when we found out the gender of baby number 2, my mother in law basically said I should just be grateful for having a baby, like I'm not grateful and because of what we've been through, I can't possibly have a preference on gender, reaffirming the fact that I'm not worthy of having feelings like a normal pregnant woman 🤨

[ClaireB24 in reply to HollyT7]

Oh my god I think I would have lost my shit at that comment. People who haven’t been through it are just clueless.

[HollyT7 in reply to ClaireB24]

my partner kept her away from me after that. when we had our first baby, she had the cheek to ask if I was making sure her son was getting enough sleep... I should have replied oh like he helped me get sleep after being up for 60 hours...?! but I was too shocked at the cheek of her.

[DJ202 in reply to HollyT7]

Omg!!

[ClaireB24 in reply to HollyT7]

She sounds super helpful!

[Fudge1980]

I still have imposter syndrome 🫣 I will be out with little miss and it’s like she’s not mine lol as if I am borrowing her 🥴. It’s just still very surreal and I think we will always pinch ourselves how lucky and blessed we are 💗

[ClaireB24 in reply to Fudge1980]

Aahhhh I hadn’t even thought of the motherhood imposter syndrome! I hope you and your little girl are doing well and the nights are getting easier!x

[JA-fnuk Partner]

Maybe this support group might be helpful ran by FNUK facebook.com/groups/Pregnan... They have monthly zoom calls .Take care of yourself

Janet

[Sunflower35]

Yes, it gets better! I remember feeling the same way at pregnancy yoga in my early weeks. Now at 33 weeks, I look bigger and feel the baby move clearly and look at the new joiners and ask myself if that’s how they feel. Some of them look like they do. It might be nice for someone to mention it at the start to make everyone in the class comfortable. 🙂

[ClaireB24 in reply to Sunflower35]

That’s a really good point, the girl beside me was at about the same stage and looked equally uncomfortable. I couldn’t stop starring at all the bumps! Good to know it gets better though. Good luck for your final few weeks!xxx

[Sunflower35 in reply to ClaireB24]

Thanks! I must also say I found it astonishing how ladies in their final weeks were so flexible and capable. I was scared to make any moves (in and outside of class) early in the pregnancy that would jeopardise the pregnancy but after going to class, I felt better knowing it was ok. Good luck!

[Hoop123]

It's very surreal! I also felt similar in my first weeks of pregnancy yoga. But I was looking a lot bigger than the others who were around my # of weeks so for some weird reason that made me feel like even more of a fraud. Welcome to the fertility mind f*ck 😆

It does get better and I think just embrace it - it's so good to start classes earlier, too! You'll feel much better for it. In one of my recent classes two ladies were due that week! Which was just awe inspiring. xx

[ClaireB24 in reply to Hoop123]

Oh wow that is dedication to the yoga! That’s useful to know you think starting early is the way to go as I was thinking of leaving it until I was further along. Purely because of my own insecurities! I’ll stick with it. I hope you’re feeling ok?xx

[Hoop123 in reply to ClaireB24]

I think stick with it if you're enjoying it! I found it eased some of my worries about what kinds of movements I could and couldn't do and it's like an investment into keeping healthy / less sore. It's also so just nice having some "you" time (I know it's for the baby, too, but it's mainly for you!) after all you've been through. You can block out some of the "your baby" talk if you need to 😊

And thanks for asking. I've only just started feeling uncomfortable now at 28 weeks, so I'm pretty happy with that and otherwise feeling well. Just giant. Coupled actually with not being able to make yoga classes for a few weeks!! xx

[Hidden]

I had such anxiety in my first pregnancy - I got a bit annoyed with other women who just took it all for granted. And especially that the baby would just arrive healthy etc. I was riddled with so many worries at the time....I can understand how you are feeling. X

[Millbanks]

Aww love, I felt like this until I was huge!

Someone offered me a seat on the tube and I didn’t feel like I deserved it.

It’s all part of actually accepting the fact that you are indeed pregnant…

Xx

[Westcoastwestie]

Currently 27 weeks. At the start I also felt like this when waiting for my scans. I have them every other week and before it was obvious I felt like I was somewhere I wasn’t meant to be. Even now when I was looking at nursery stuff the other day I felt like I shouldn’t have been. It’s very strange but getting better.

[Hidden]

I felt (and still feel) like this during yoga class! Every time she says ‘your baby’ I think oh yes. It does get a bit easier x

[Claire_FNUK Administrator]

You are definitely not alone in this feeling. I'll be honest, it took over 6 months after my little boy was born to genuinely believe he was mine and wasn't going anywhere! We run a lovely support meeting on zoom if you want to come along sometime, you don't have to join in, you can stay camera and mic off and join in if/when you feel like it but it may help you realise you are definitely not the only one feeling this way. It's held on 4th Wednesday of the month at 8pm. I'll share the event to this page nearer the time in September or if you email me I can just keep you posted. [e-mail]. The transition from fertility to maternity can be almost as difficult as the journey in itself! Holding a good thought for you x