This is just a rant because I need to get my feelings out.
I can't believe this happened to me. I was supposed to finally have my laparoscopy today and I was literally ready to be taken through to get my gown on when I was told my laparoscopy has been cancelled.
I had been waiting around in the waiting room since early this morning and at 3pm I was told that my op was cancelled due to the girl before me having complications.
They couldn't fit me in until August so I have to come back then. I'm grateful I was not just put back on the waiting list but it's also another 3-4 weeks wait.
I completely understand the situation and I'm not angry at anybody in particular. I hope that patient is okay and she doesn't have too serious issues due to the op. We all have to look out for each other and I would expect no less treatment if I was the one with the complications. I'm just absolutely gutted.
I'm also really angry because my whole recovery plans have been ruined. My family took time off to look after me and now I won't have any support in August when I actually get the operation - they can't get time off in August too because it is too short notice to cancelled this week's time off.
So obviously I'm feeling very sorry for myself tonight! I just feel like I'm always getting completely screwed over - I'm never a priority and I always have to gracefully allow everyone else to have their turn to be looked after. Well it was supposed to be my turn today after so many years of pain.
I literally can't believe that yet another thing has gone wrong for me in this health journey. Has this happened to anyone else? Am I being selfish for feeling so upset?
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RueBlu3
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I am so so sorry to read this. This is not fair. To be waiting around that length of time to then change your date is unacceptable. Was there anyone else waiting too?
The way the NHS deal with Gynae issues is shocking. They are playing with people's emotions. We have all waited so long for this. Even the initial appt with the consultant can be 16 months. It's obvious people plan for this. Like yourself, arrange for loved ones to be there after your op. Maybe have people looking after your children or pets. This makes me so angry.
Im sti waiting for my laproscopy. Nearly a year so far. I think I have come to realise, I won't believe I'm having it until I have had my anaesthetic. We are hearing this far too much now adays. Totally unacceptable.
Nobody else was having a gynae op today, just me and the person before me :(( I was the only one waiting all day, everyone else was orthopaedic and got taken really quick.
Thank you so much for validating my feelings, I was worried I was an asshole for feeling so angry at the situation. You're so right, like I won't trust my op is happening until I'm on the table falling asleep! Totally awful situations with gynae issues and it gives is all emotional whiplash + destroys our trust.
You’re not selfish you’re human! AND one who is unwell and in considerable pain. You had also worked yourself up to be ready for surgery not only that but starved yourself aswell. Waiting your turn as you see people begin to go down is nerve wracking enough but when it gets to the hours going by that changes to wondering what’s going on and frustration. Don’t worry you are not being selfish or nasty or rude or anything else down that line. August will soon come and you will soon be recovering from the surgery and ready for the next stage of your health care. Best of luck.
I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this! If it helps, I have felt the same way since December with my GP and hospital visits. I've not been diagnosed yet but they've been investigating since December and now suspect endo. I've had several GP apps with the same doctor (five or six I think) and he still doesn't remember what my symptoms are. He clearly never takes a note of anything on my file as he always asks the same questions. They can never get my blood and take several attempts or give up. The one time they did manage to get my blood they 'lost or damaged' the sample so it couldn't be used.
When they referred me for an ultrasound, they forgot to make the referral and I had to chase it up myself. My GP was convinced that I had something wrong with my bowels, so referred me for a colonoscopy, but they booked me in for a gastroscopy instead, so I had to call round several departments myself, rebook and wait even longer. Then when I'd done the bowel prep and was in the waiting room, they refused to do the procedure because my blood pressure was too high, even though I explained it's just anxiety. They wouldnt let me just take five minutes to calm myself and get it back down. So I had to rebook again. Then I got a trainee for the second colonoscopy and it was horrendously painful. He kept saying stuff to the doctor like 'are you sure you trust me to do this?' (And it was pointless because it all came back clear.)
All the while I knew I needed to see a gynae, but I've had to jump through so many hoops to get that referral. So I know how you feel when you say it feels like you're not the priority and like everything is going wrong! It feels crap. You are 100% not being selfish. In fact, it sounds like youve probably kept your cool really well. You have every right to be upset. Wallow in it for a bit! Just make sure you come out the other side. I'm sorry you've now got to go through the recovery without your family around. If there is anything we can do to help on here, always reach out ❤
Thank you so much for your kind words ❤️ I'm sorry you've been fobbed off too but it does help to know that I'm not the only one who this happens to. Although it shouldn't happen to any of us!
I appreciate the advice, I'm allowing myself to be sad today so I bought myself a cookie and I'm watching my favourite Disney movie haha
Good luck to you in your journey and I hope we all get to a place where things have been properly treated and are managable x
Love the cookie and Disney plan, haha! Brilliant. You're right, it shouldn't happen to any of us. When you feel better, you can start fighting again!Thank you, good luck to you too X
Hey, I'm so sorry you had that experience. I also had one just like that, so understand your frustrations.They got to 4pm and got me in for the chat (was a late morning arrival) was warned that it might not go ahead as theaters close at 5pm and they were running behind.
I do not have good veins and getting bloods and getting canulars in is something in a mission in its self! So this happened at 4.15, by 4.45 they were all being taken out and it was not going ahead.
Again like you I understood and they wanted me ready just in case! But still it was traumatic. I was very low at this point, and i said about people being off work to care for me etc, they managed to put me straight onto their Monday morning list before I left the hospital (this was Friday pm) we got to Monday and I was the 2nd one in. It might be worth phoning them explaining the situation with your after care and seeing if they can work you in by the end of the week. Give it a good go.
Aw man I'm so sorry this happened to you too. It's such a disappointment when you prepare for such a big event and it gets taken away. Thank you for the advice, best wishes x
Perhaps it leaves you more time to be better prepared? You know that you need to follow a specific diet one week prior to having your surgery and after the surgery as well? They usually don't have much time to tell patients to do so (to avoid a hemorrhage and complications).
Yeah, like, imagine being the first patient with complications because you hadn't prepared yourself accordingly. I'd better wait and be sure not to get any bad surprises. 😅 Like green tea is forbidden in preparation to your surgery (increases risks of hemorrhage)...
You can easily Google it. Like look at the foods that can make you bleed more easily during surgery, if it's for the bowel + + +, etc + after surgery.
• in reply to
Are you having surgery on your bowel? If not then I don’t think the diet for 3 days prior or bowel cleanse is necessary for you. My last surgery did not involve the bowel and no diet was needed. I’ve added what my letter has stated I should eat and not. I hope this helps
I know this wasn't aimed at me but I'm not having a bowel surgery surgery either it's urology and gynae. Either way I suppose watching what we eat won't do any harm considering.. 😂 thank you so much for showing that letter by the way! Is that a list of what we can have or what we can't?
That is a list of what you should eat 3 days before. The day before my surgery I can have breakfast before 09:00 and then only clear liquids up to the evening then nothing.
Hey I completely understand your frustration as I had the same but was in my gown wait since the morning and second in the que for the op. I was upset, frustrated but also empathetic and understanding of the Dr and the other patient. I didn't want to do the bowel prep all over again. My appointment was the week after so not too long to wait. When you had everything organised for aftercare for yourself only for it to need to be cancelled on the day must have been soul destroying and now knowing you might not have that support available once you have the op must make you feel anxious and slightly alone. I wish the best and hope you recover well and quickly. Laura x
I appreciate your response and I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you too. It was absolutely gutting and I felt all the same emotions as you - understanding of the situation but still upset at all the work I had to do behind the scenes! I was so embarrassed when they cut off my hospital bands and then made me leave. I was thinking "oh god, what now?"Thank you for making me feel less alone x
You are definitely not alone and yes unpredictable situations happen but it is only human to express the array of feelings and emotions that then run through your head. To have to rethink and plan for the next hopeful date that you have painfully been seeking to help ease your suffering. I hope you feel stronger once recovered x
Hi super frustrating. I am an O. R. Nurse. Let it go, this is done. When you rebook ask for the first appointment of the day. If they can’t ask for different day when you are first or second on schedule. Good luck! I also have endometriosis. Make sure schedule laser surgery at same time if they find it. Get IT Out!!!
Your allowed. Don’t apologise. The other patients needs and your feelings aren’t in competition here. Both are real. Arrangements and support are important and that’s been utterly screwed for you by this change. Feel for you as well after all the exhausting and mind numbing struggle to get there and stick it out.
It is however as it is and without being aggravating planning for an “alternative recovery support programme” is something there’s a bit of time to shuffle with. I found myself in a situation where I’d had an op away from home and the “post operation landing pad “ with family decided on the day as I lay recovering ( don’t ask ) they weren’t willing to do it -by text- after months of planning . Plans had to be revamped , friends rallied and it ended up being a very different few days. Can’t say it was easy, right or hasn’t been without repercussions emotionally but we are all able to handle shit when it feels impossible for the most part. I ended up with some real positives as being the outcome. You’ll find another way even if it feels and looks very different. 😊
just read your post, very frustrating , I’m really sorry to read your emotional rollercoaster, I know it’s not much comfort but time will fly by and will soon be August, hope all goes well and that someone can manage to get time off to help support you afterwards x
completely understand how you are feeling. It is so awful. My laparoscopy was cancelled 3 times. I was told he had to operate on some cancer patients. When will we be seen and heard? It’s not good enough
Also it depends how much endo you have, what procedures are performed e.g hysterectomy, how many previous operations you’ve had, and how good the surgeon and anaesthetist are. If it is your first diagnostic laparoscopy Recovery is not as bad as you think.
Oh my gosh 3 times??? I'm so sorry that happened to you! What a nightmare. Did you ever get your op?
It's totally not good enough for that to happen. While we understand and empathise with those who are worse off than us, it does suck that we can never get our turn to have some care because most of us have been waiting YEARS.
Doesn't it always feel like you have to smile and step aside to let other people be saved, while you're screaming inside for help? That's how I feel at least.
Thanks for the advice, it's my first ever op so it's good to hear the recovery isn't too bad 🤞
You are entitled to have these feelings, endo is such a long journey of uncertainty, waiting and putting life on hold for each surgery. Someone once told me however you feel is valid and no one else should tell you how they think you should be feeling. You are not selfish at all, just completely frustrated and tired from the situation, endo wears you down both physically and mentally, it’s good to let these feelings out and not bottle them up. I wish you all the best with your op and recovery. Hopefully you will soon feel that life can get back on track and make plans to do something to look forward to. Take care of yourself and try to do something nice just for you, no matter how small each day. Self care is important and you matter.
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