I'm not sure anymore!

[Pureunicorn]

Hi, hope ur all well and as comfortable as can be. I'm having second thoughts about being completely for have a full hysterectomy, I would really like another child but I've been talking myself out of it as I'm not sure I would be able to anyway, my husband and I were trying after I had a miscarriage but it just never happened again, then I got the terrible diagnosis of endometriosis, I'm ment to be seeing my endo specialist at the end of july, do I ask the question! Or do I just expect that it's just not going to happen again and go ahead with the surgery that I so much need!?!?

I'm not really sure what to do, has anyone else been in the same situation? I already have 4 beautiful children so should I just be happy, I'm in so much pain and I'm now on the last thing i can try! I'm just feeling so confused and emotional about it all, it's so weird as I thought I was ready for the total hysterectomy!

Thanku for reading and stay safe xx

[RunningMum11]

Hey👋🏻 so sorry to hear you’re having a tough time😢 Maybe it would be a good idea to talk this through with your consultant. Having a hysterectomy is so final, and if you want more children then once it’s done there’s no going back. However, if you decide not to have more, and it’s the only option, and if it will change your quality of life with regards to pain and discomfort then maybe it’s a consideration. So hope this helps. Hang in there. Xx

[Pureunicorn in reply to RunningMum11]

Hi, thankyou for ur reply, yes I think I will but I'm pretty sure that I wont be able to have anymore 😞 I just dont know what's come over me, I've been fine with it and know what needs to be done is the best thing for me, I just think its cos I'm having such a crsp time at the mo, I feel really down n cry for no reason (I'm not normally a crying person) xx

[RunningMum11 in reply to Pureunicorn]

Bless you. Maybe because a hysterectomy is so final it’s made you consider more about having more children Also when we are feeling down it’s harder to process things and we can feel so negative about everything. Then it all becomes overwhelming and nothing makes sense. Is there a reason why you’re feeling so tearful?? Xx😊

[Linley]

Hi!

Think you have stated two important factors in your post that should help you decide

1. "I have 4 beautiful children"

2. "I am in so much pain"

I know what I would do but ultimately the decision is yours.

Sending you a big hug🤗and wish you good luck for the future

[Pureunicorn in reply to Linley]

Hi, thankyou for ur message, yes I know ur right, I dont really know why I feel like this, I think it's just cos I'm having such a crap time and feel so low, it's hard to try and put on a brave face all the time, thanks again xx

[Moonglo in reply to Pureunicorn]

Hello lovely I’m inclined to agree with Linley. It sounds like you know this in your head, but your heart is conflicted because the choice has been taken away from you.

You shouldn’t feel pressured to do anything until you’re ready, but equally there’s some urgency if you’re in pain.

Maybe it’s worth pursuing some counselling before deciding - could your specialist or GP recommend someone? Xx

[Pureunicorn in reply to Moonglo]

Hi, thankyou for ur reply, it's nice to hear others opinions, I know what needs to be done, and deep down I know I cant have anymore children and for the last year I've come to terms with it, I think like u say when u ha e a hysterectomy it's so final, and I think the medical menopause probably isn't helping with my emotions either (this is my 3rd week of a 4 week injection, so could put it down to that!) I just want the constant pain to stop and nit feel so tired all the time and it would be nice to not have to take so many tablets in one day!!

It's so nice to be able to come on here and find others to support u and know what it's like, thanku and hope ur well too xx

[Moonglo in reply to Pureunicorn]

It might be that the injection is affecting your mood, especially if these feelings seem to have come suddenly, and seemingly from nowhere. Do you know the name of it? It might be worth looking up the side effects.

The injections (Zoladex) have been fantastic for me, but I do need to start thinking whether to take the next step and request a hysterectomy.

Best of luck

[Pureunicorn in reply to Moonglo]

I'm on decapeptyl, but I'm not taking HRT as the gp said not too unless I really need it and I font really want to take it if I can help it! it's the last thing I can try, but I've been suffering a lot with my bowels and the pains are different, a lot more on my right side and now starting on my left side, I've had the odd day of spotting too 🙄. How long have u been on the injections? What's ur endo like? It's just such a crap thing to have! It takes over ur life! Xx

[Moonglo in reply to Pureunicorn]

Believe it or not, I’ve been on Zoladex since late 2013. My BSGE specialist agreed to let me carry on until my ‘natural’ menopause because I’d already been suffering for 20 years. I was put on Zoladex after an emergency lap (and 3 failed IVF cycles) and since then my pain (and awful heavy periods) have disappeared. I do take HRT (Tibolone) and have regular dexa scans to check my bone density. What’s mad is that you and I could have different types of endo - mine seems to generate chocolate ovarian cysts that like to burst very painfully!

I genuinely think it would affect my mental health if I got periods again because I’m scared of the pain and the cysts returning. The Zoladex seems to have shrunk it.

I’m very happy to be child free as I’m spoilt rotten by my hubby.

I hope that puts things into perspective a little- sometimes you just need to hear a little sympathy and encouragement.

[Pureunicorn in reply to Moonglo]

Thankyou so much, and yes its helped a lot, I feel very lucky to have a beautiful family and I know it's not like that for so many, I'm nit normally a feel sorry for yourself sort of pearson, but I think sometimes we can over think things! I feel a little silly for feeling sorry for myself, yhankyou for all ur messages and taking the time to talk to me, it's been a breath of fresh air (so to speak) 😊 gd luck with ur journey and hopefully we will both get the help we need xx

[JulesUK]

The only thing I would add is that many doctors recommend hysterectomy as a 'cure' but people who have it can still get endo. i would discuss it with the specialist in July and if you feel like you still want another child I would explore it further. x

[Hidden]

I was detirmed I wanted no more even though medically I couldn't due to thyroid issues also but since I had my hysterectomy 2 weeks ago I swear all its been is pregnant people or Baby's lol. Xxx

[Pureunicorn in reply to Hidden]

I know what u mean 🙄 lol! I think its just when u are having it taken out of ur hands, that's when u start to think about it!! Xx