Bridesmaid after op!!

[MegVarny]

I am due to have an op (excision) on the 29th October and I am a bridesmaid the week after on the 7th November!

I seriously do not know how I am going to cope... from exp of my other ops I know it takes much longer than 1 week to heal!

Anyone been in a similar situation/have any tips?

[Christin_a]

Hello

I've not been in the same situation. But as you said it takes longer than a week to heal. I'd say you need to have a frank conversation with the bride about what she should and shouldn't expect or of you on the day, I think it's better to have that conversion now rather than on the day. Be realistic, don't say that'll be fine if there's any doubt in your mind about being able to do it and that you might have to call it a night early etc.

If your wearing heels make sure you take flats with you as walking in heels will probably not help. But you could wear them say for the ceremony and pictures then change.

Keep completely on top of your pain meds and try to time it so it's not midway through the ceremony that you need to take a dose. And make sure you have a bag with them in to hand.

[MegVarny in reply to Christin_a]

You are right, thank you so much

[Amusegirl]

If it were me, I would put myself first and cancel the responsibility of being a bridesmaid. If it is a true friend/relative that cares, they should fully understand and then you offer that you can be there emotionally on the day, but physically you need to sit and rest, try enjoy it as much as possible. Your health is far more important, you don't want more adhesions forming in your healing, which will cause your more pain down the line. Love and value yourself, you are worth it. X

[AllthatGlitters]

Hi just to give you a bit of reassurance I was fine after a week, tired but coped with the op. I know everyone heals differently. Can you speak to the bride and explain this to her that you may or may not be there as a bridesmaid on the day? That way you will take pressure away from yourself

[RR12345]

Hi

I would love to say that having endo shouldn't stop you from doing anything, especially important life events with people you love and care about! But, I'd agree talking with bride to make some extra arrangements for your care should be the first step.

Also something to think about might be the dress - I found I couldn't wear anything fitted or tight around the bodice for weeks after my surgery. Maybe the bride could choose a looser style dress? I'm sure it would be possible - I'm currently planning my own wedding and have tried to make my choice around the fact that one of my bridesmaids is pregnant. I want her to feel as accommodated as possible!

Again, with the pain and tiredness - will you have a room onsite or in a nearby hotel... could you go for a good lay down or nap in the afternoon period after the meal and before the evening reception begins? I know a few guests did this at a friend's wedding I attended, in order to rejuvenate themselves.

Also, maybe you could be sat next to someone during the meal that will know about your lap and will be able to give you support/explain if you need to leave? And maybe find out if there are chairs/ places to sit during the photographs/canapes, as there is normally a lot of waiting time after the ceremony before the breakfast begins?

Hope that helps and gives you some food for thought.

Fingers crossed all goes well for you and your op!