I’m feeling a bit all over the shop... happy it’s over, scared it’s over. Worried for the future, excited for the future. Is this normal? I’m also only 5 days post op major surgery so I can’t do much and finding sitting around my mind is going loco!!!!! If I get a twinge of pain (I did have some of my vagina cut out and bowel taken away) I worry it’s coming back. HELP! X
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Kittykat8989
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Hello sorry to hear you’re feeling like this... if it’s any consolation I always feel completely all over the place and pretty down and depressed after surgery. It lasts a few weeks for me normally. Glad that it’s over but a bit sad for yourself that you’ve had to go through everything. And almost a sense of anticlimax despite not wanting to have gone through surgery... don’t be tempted to overdo it physically because it will just delay your recovery but try and keep your mind stimulated and occupied in other ways. My friends have been very good at messaging me and starting to talk about the sorts of things we can all do together when I’m better. I’ve tried to not just sit and watch tv but try reading etc instead. Coming on here a fair bit has helped. You’re going to be incredibly sore so try not to worry it’s the endo back. Surgery pain can often feel the same as endo pain as it’s major disruption and trauma to the same bits of tissue. I’m sat here three weeks post excision surgery first day of my period in so much pain it’s like the endo is back but we just have to trust our surgeons! It’s not back already it’s just our bodies have been through massive traumas! Have you got family or friends that could maybe keep you company and talk through your concerns? Even if they don’t know what to say just being listened to can help. It does take a fair while to mentally and physically recover so take each day as it comes and don’t get down if you’re not running a marathon in three months’ time ☺️ You’ll get there eventually. Just try not to over think your feelings (both mental and physical) the first few weeks. I think you’ll get a fair few replies on here reassuring you this is normal and you’re not alone. Sending hugs xxx
Thank you! Your message made me cry as it’s exactly what I needed hear.
I had an almost golf ball size nodule at the top of my vagina and I’m getting pain where they cut it out and cut into my vagina. So logically I get why the pain is still there but naturally the pain is reminding me of before the op.
I feel like I’ve put my family and friends through enough this year. I’m starting counselling on Wednesday so I will have an outlet to vent.
I don’t think I mentally prepared myself for how big the surgery would be. I was in hospital for 4 days with a catheter and a fluid drain pipe coming out of my side. It was horrible. I was also tachycardic for most of the time I was in there and doped up on morphine. I know I’m putting too much pressure on myself. It’s just so much to go through xx
Oh no! I’m sorry I made you cry! I should say being very emotional is completely normal post surgery too! I had severe nausea constantly with my endo and feel so traumatised by it every time I manage a small task (I.e. a small car journey) I’m terrified the nausea will hit me but when it doesn't come and I feel like bursting into tears.
You’re only five days in to major surgery - I’m three weeks into excision surgery (much less done than you by the sounds of things) and I’m pretty sore and tired still so just accept that you’ve had major trauma to the body and it needs time to heal. Make sure you keep taking your painkillers even if you think you’re okay/ not in too much pain as I thought I was not too bad one day so didn’t take them and got so much pain that evening I didn’t do that again! My mum is medical and has studied pain management since I started with endo as a teentager and good pain management is keeping on top of the pain/ medicating the pain before it comes.
Surgery is traumatic. I was in a couple of days too including ICU and lots of morphine. I also wasn’t prepared for the catheter and fluid drain. I don’t know about you but the fluid drain I still have nightmares about! I found that the worst bit of everything! It’s good that you’re considering therapy, I am too for the nausea element of being ill as I panic constantly about it coming back! In the meantime however I would reach out to friends - they may think you don’t want to be bothered with lots of texts or calls due to having just had surgery - lots of mine messaged me saying “don’t worry about replying as I know you’re just out of hospital...” if you need to talk I would ask them one more time. It’s awful for family and friends not able to do anything to help with endo but at least post surgery and feeling a bit down they can actually help so will probably be glad they can finally do something!
Can I just check you’ve got someone looking after you at home? You’re not trying to cope with getting food and drinks by yourself? You will get through this. I think it sounds like how you’re feeling is sad for yourself that you’ve been through so much, which is how I often feel. And it is a lot to go through. An awful lot. Endo ladies have to be so brave and just “get on” with so much it actually comes as a shock when we are “allowed” to actually be in pain and not able to do anything. It’s almost like surgery validates us being in pain and exhausted but the endo doesn’t somehow... stay strong! You’re going to start living life again soon and you’ll be feeling a tiny bit better each day xxx
No please don’t apologise. It’s just nice getting reassurance from someone whose been through it. My family have been lovely but bless them they don’t really know what they’re talking about when saying “I’m sure the pain is normal” ha ha.
The drain will scar me for life, when I first came round I thought it was a colostomy bag and I kept saying to my husband please go get someone and find out what this fricking drain is lol.
I’ve got my Husband here but I’m getting up every half hour or so to make a drink or do the washing up. I’m bored lol, but my pain has been worse the last couple of days as I’ve been doing a lot xx
Oh bless them, well I suppose being in pain after surgery is normal but they obviously won’t understand quite what it feels like and how bad it is!
Yes when they took it out I had a few choice words that may have been used when I saw how big it was!
Can I be a teensy bit bossy and say I think washing up is a bit too much five days after major surgery and should wait until next week? Unless it’s just like ten minutes? I did start doing a few little bits like putting a load of washing on (with my feet haha!!) but I did get a lot of hip pain if I tried to do too much. You’ve got cabin fever I’m afraid!! I do understand but if you’re making your pain worse then that’s your body telling you to slow down!! xxx
I know, problem is I’m desperately trying to live a “normal” life. I should also add that I also had a lap just over 8 weeks ago so had the recovery with that. Which is why I’m not being a very good paitient this time.
I’m doing the washing up in incriments don’t worry lol.
I was trauamatised, my catheter and drain came out within 5 mins of one another. I felt awful, so sick and dizzy. Thank you for your kind and encouraging words... just need to keep flooding myself with positive messages instead of negative ones xx
Oh poor you that’s a lot of surgery so close together - not even recovered from the first properly before the next one you will get normal life back soon xxx
Haha glad to hear it about the washing up
Catheter hurt a little bit but the fluid drain - it didn’t hurt really but I was shocked when something sticking out of my tummy caused a yank so far down my pelvis. And then when I saw how much was in there I nearly passed out and had a panic attack!
All the best! Stay positive and if ever you need to talk let me know xxx wishing you a speedy recovery xxx
Yes I'd say it's normal. I find the anesthetic makes me a little depressed. I struggle eating and it makes me tired for weeks after. The first anesthetic after a hysterscopy I felt really down.
My advice is to try to process and reflect on how you are feeling. Unfortunately it's usually when I am feeling better I realise I was struggling mentally and emotionally. My emotions were all over the place. You have recognised your mixed emotions which is a healthy place to be to move forward xx
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