Help

[Calinab3]

When I have sex there is a lot of pain. Going to an appointment to get tested for Endo. I don't mean to make this like a therapist or anything but. I'm physically unable to have sex. The pain is is just unbearable and I can't stand the thought of having to go through it. My boyfriend of 3 years has been getting a little grumpy since I rarely ever have sex. I also don't have forplay or show any type of sexual love just because my mind races and the thought of him asking for sex just scares me so I stop everything. He just doesn't understand no matter what I tell him. What should I do

[Ilogn]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I've been diagnosed with endometriosis and one of my symptoms is terribly painful sex. Me and my partner rarely have sex due to this.

Obviously getting a diagnosis and starting some form of treatment may help. The only way to get an official diagnosis is via a lapoaoscopy surgery to check for endo. If found it can be removed and this could give you relief.

I'm also due to start pelvic floor therapy soon which my doctor says may help with pain during intercourse.

You need to sit down and have a discussion with you partner. Id only been with my boyfriend about a year when my symptoms started. He got frustrated too and this was down to lack of understanding nothing more. Sometimes giving him material to read really helped and gave us a point for discussion. It's taken us a while but by being very open and honest about how I'm feeling but also hiw hes feeling to we've reached a point where we are happy and able to be intimate in other ways when (as it mostly is) intercourse isn't possibly.

Maybe you could take your partner to your appointments (if you're comfortable with that) to give him a greater understanding.

I wish you all the best and hope you find some relief soon xx

[Starry]

Big hugs. It's such a difficult situation.

I've always suffered dyspareunia but was only diagnosed last year. My ability to have sex ground to a halt a couple of months before the diagnostic lap and I had excision in July, which has made it possible again but I still suffer pain, though it is gradually lessening. This has put a major strain on my marriage and I've wondered if we will make it through after a lifetime of painful sex I'd go celibate in a heartbeat if I could, but he made clear that he could not accept that.

My post op physio advised me to us water yes yes yes and when my issues continued my gynae suggested to try Amie vaginal trainer to stretch the vagina ( it was shortened in my surgery due to Endo damage)

There are some good resources out there here's just a few link

endometriosis.org/resources...

endometriosis.org/support/p...

ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedheal...

jeanhailes.org.au/health-a-...

centerforendo.com/the-partn...

[Ilogn in reply to Starry]

Thanks for the links they're really helpful hope you find relief soon xxx