My heart goes out to you. I know hearing other's opinion is not always easy when you feel people aren't quite in the same situation as you or don't quite understand, but I think I can understand your situation, having reply to one of your previous posts too. I used to be in a very stressful work environment running my own business singlehandedly, I worked myself into the ground trying desperately to please everyone, all of the time, never once missing a deadline and never letting anyone down. However...what I never realised was how much I was letting myself down, I was being everything to everybody yet doing nothing for myself. My mental health was suffering as I often got no thanks, despite regularly putting myself out for people to a huge extent, and a far bigger extent than most being that I battled with chronic fatigue and un-diagnosed endo. I worked very long hours, slept terribly, ate badly and never once put myself first. That went on for 13 years. I'm now 43, desperately trying to still have a family and battling with very severe stage IV RV endo and I dream of being able to turn time back and wished I'd put myself first just once.
Yes, it's very easy to say just be kind to yourself, back off work, give yourself time etc etc, as I know it is far easier to say than do and life still has to go on and you still have to earn an living, I get it, but having been in the thick of it and still fighting to come out the other side with so many regrets having not cared for myself, I feel I can say you must start putting yourself at the top of the list as it doesn't sound like you are doing. You are having to cope with a huge amount both mentally and physically and are doing brilliantly, but don't underestimate what that fight entails and the energy it uses up, what you don't need is anything to further demoralise you yet that is exactly what is happening when you get no real credit at work.
With hindsight, I wished I'd told more people just to pi** off and made myself the important one, as that alone can make a real dent mentally. What I have also realised having had to take the last two years off work completely, not only to try and recover from total peritoneal excision but also try to have a family, is that 2 years out of my 43 years so far has hardly meant anything at all. Yes, it will be hard to get back on the horse again, I may have to re-train to catch up on what I've missed, but the satisfaction of having put my recovery and my feelings first far outweighs any worry with regard to any job. It has also given me time to reflect and realise somethings are not as important as you initially thought they were.
You matter most and sometimes you need to re-focus and recognise that. Battling endo is a truly exhausting process without being further demoralised by other people's influence. Don't underestimate the energy needed, I'm 15 years down the line of battling severe chronic fatigue which came from un-diagnosed endo, plus 5 years of surgery on endo/recovery and the added stress of infertility, the fight has truly broken me, don't wait until you are forced to stop your life to look after yourself, try and pre-empt what lies ahead and start putting you at number one spot.
Be strong and put yourself first. Sxx