Advice needed! Lap in 11 days - more worried about them not finding anything & feeling like this for the rest of my life!

[JadeH92]

Hi all,

I apologise in advance for this massive rant but I'm hoping that someone could give me some advice.

I've had 2 laproscopies in the past to remove endometriosis (last one 2 years ago). I have also been on most contraceptive pills, the depo injection, the mirena coil (5 times in 2 years!) and finally and most recently Zoladex with HRT.

I decided to come off the Zoladex injections as me and my partner want to try for children in the near future however my pain is now horrendous!

I am due to have surgery in 11 days and I have all my hopes on the fact they will find something and remove it so I can have my life back.

Work is getting more difficult as I am struggling to even walk and I just keep thinking there will be a light at the end of the tunnel and I will wake up from surgery and be able to carry on with my life and do the job I worked soo hard to get (as I am a nurse).

So now I am panicking in case they don't find anything and then there is no reason/answer for my pain. I know my pain is real but what if people don't believe me if there is nothing found at the time of my surgery!

How will i carry on if this is how I will feel for the rest of my life!?

Again sorry for my rant but I needed to get this off my chest!

[Abi831]

Don't be sorry for your rant! I feel exactly the same!

I came off the contraceptive pill over two years ago to start a family when my husband and I married. I have been in agony ever since, my periods are horrendous, I can't walk or eat, I double over in pain, vomit and have passed out in the past. The flow is also horrendous. I have had to throw out so many clothes! I then get period like cramps and tugging all month.

I was on metformin, as I was diagnosed with PCOS back in April when I went privately, but have since been allowed on the fertility unit (Have to be TTC over two years) However my new Infertility Doctor told me to come off it, and again I have been riddled with pain. So I went against his advice and had a stash of the drugs and have been back on it which has helped with my cramps since AF. Suspected endo.

I just had my phone call and letter for my operation on Fri 16th, and i'm both excited and nervous. This has been two years of torture and heartache.

I am also really worried that they won't find anything! My aunt has endo really bad, and struggled to have children. The pain is so bad, and she couldn't have a hysterectomy because it's attached to all her organs.

I really don't know what i'll do, if they say I don't have it. My SIL said yeah but thats a good thing right? And I was like no! Because I can't live my life like this, it's affecting our marriage, life, work...everything!

Anyway, I can't give you any advice, but we're in the same boat, and I hope they find something for you.

Abi xx

[JadeH92 in reply to Abi831]

Sorry to hear you are in the same situation but also kind of glad that I'm not alone!

I don't want people to think I'm wishing things on myself by wanting them to find more endo, because I was give anything to not have it at all. However as much as I am supported by my partner mum and friends, my partner doesn't get it when I say i known i'll be in a bad place if nothing is there. Because I am a natural worrier I think he thinks I'm just finding stuff to worry about but I will genuinely feel my life is over if this surgery doesn't help!

I am sorry to reply so negatively. I hope all goes well for you on the 17th and you get the answers you are looking for. Keep me posted!

P.s. Is it your first lap? if so I recommend peppermint capsules for the trapped wind because it is very uncomfortable especially around your shoulders.

Take care x

[Tryx]

I understand exactly how you feel, I had that fear as was fobbed off around 2+ yrs and as much as I didn't want to be diagnosed with something i needed an answer as felt i was going crazy and the pain was affecting my work and home life etc. I had my lap in June where they found Endometriosis on my uterosacral ligaments which is die and excised it, I was fitted with the mirena coil which hasn't helped but I'm back to see the gynaecologist next month again as my back pain etc is worse. Try not to worry about it, with endo it's a long journey so I like to think of it in stages so I can cope better. I hope that whatever the outcome is for you, you get the best treatment and get better soon x