So today my sister, who is six months pregnant with her second child, posted a status on facebook saying "i hate being pregnant and i'm not apologising for it!"
I calmly commented on it that she should be greatful to be pregnant as some women don't get the chance to ever be pregnant, and that i would gladly swap the fake menopause for a real pregnancy! She told me not to take it so personally... How can I not?? She knows exactly how much I want a baby right now, and what treatments I am having yet is insensitive enough to post status' like that??
I have hated every minute of her being pregnant and have even excluded myself from certain family occasions so i dont have to be near her and her bump and all the people talking about her bump, yet ive still made the effort to congratulate her and give her a card with money etc towards whatever she wants for the baby... So why if I can be kind to her can't she consider my feelings too??
I have been in tears all morning because I feel so much anger towards her and i feel like I cant express it because it will put my mum in an awkward situation choosing between her daughters when ones having a baby and the other is fighting for the chance to ever get pregnant! It always makes me look like the bad one too.. Im the bitch for not going to the baby shower next month etc etc.. I dont see her texting and asking how my treatments are going, but im expected to be asking my sister how she is??
Yes I get that pregnancy has its ups and downs and isnt perfect but i would do absolutely anything for nine months of an awful pregnancy than another nine months of endo and the menopause!!
Sorry for ranting I just feel so sad right now! My second zoladex injection has taken over my moods by the feel of things and my sister isnt making it any easier..
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Andys_Girl
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Hi Andys_girl, don't let it get you down. Some people will never understand.
When my younger sister was trying to fall pregnant for the first time last year, I tried to give her advice about diet etc (which wasn't great) as she was worried it was taking her so long to fall pregnant. Having been in the position of trying to conceive a second time for the last ten years, I tried to help her but she threw it back in my face and said if I was such an expert how come I hadn't conceived again !! I won't ever forget this and one day I will bring this up with her. I had my last lap on the 31st Dec from which I'm still recovering, and all she could say to me was, "you've had a lot of ops, what's wrong with you ??" It was said in a very unconcerned tone. All I'm saying is, a lot of women on this forum have probably had a similar experience, don't let it get to you and stress you out as your health is so much more important and stressing over something which doesn't really matter is not going to help you. So go to the baby shower etc and one day in the future when the time is right, I'm sure you'll have the chance to put her right. Don't let her get you down !!
Thanks for your reply hun. Its definitely the hardest thing i have had to deal with so far. It just sucks so bad. It doesnt help that we arent exactly close anyway and have always had a pretty tense relationship.
I appreciate your advice fingers crossed one day she might understand!! Xxx
Thankyou hun! You have definitel described my sister to a tee!
I already have her set to restricted on my facebook but my boyfriend noticed the post and once i'd seen it I couldn't hold back from saying something. She is definitely the most selfish, self centered person I know and am glad to say that we are complete opposites! It makes me feel guilty that im not happy for her but then I have done everything possible to be civil and not make her feel bad for being pregnant, sending her a cArd and money towards anything the baby might need etc, but if I can be strong enough to make sure she has an enjoyable pregnancy then why cant she be courteous towards me and keep small minded comments about not enjoying pregnancy to herself! I wouldnt mind but her pregnancy has been smooth running so far, and shes not even that big! But heyy what would I know about carrying a baby in her eyes??
Her comment to me when I said to her to stop moaning because some people wud never get a chance was "dont take it personally, i just want my body back!" ... She wants her body back haha!! Id love to have my body back! No more injections, pain, doctors appointments, invasive procedures etc! She has no idea about losing her body!!
Sorry i dont mean to get angry all over again I just feel like no one other than the people on this forum get this! And i feel like i cant talk to my parents or my family about this without coming across as a jealous and bitter person. My boyfriend totally gets it and I have a few close friends I can talk to, but I dont want to ruin those relationships by sounding like a naggy witch all the time either! My boyfriend has been great today and just let me mope around, hopefully this is mainly just a zoladex symptom that will wear off in a day or two
Anywaayyy....
Congratulations on your pregnancy! I hope that the next two trimesters go much smoother for you, especially as you have had a harder journey than most to get to this point!
Stories like yours are definitely great for hope! Gives me something to believe in!
Sorry to hear that. My sister in law was exactly the same and was pregnant at exactly the same time I was diagnosed and it was so hard to listen to. I had to come off Facebook for a while as all my friends kept posting their ultrasound pictures or announcing their pregnancies and I was in tears every time I looked. Honestly I would recommend it, just give yourself a break from all the pregnancy chat and go do other things you enjoy and surround yourself with your positive and supportive friends. Don't give up hope, I didn't and now have a little 2 year old. x
Yeah I spent the weekend with my boyfriend and we just done couple stuff like the cinema etc. I get upset just looking at pregnant people or seeing babies/ toddlers but im sure one day itl get easier and like you say one day we could have our own little one!
Thanks for your help and advice! Facebook is definitely close to being deleted. Xxx
I know exactly how u feel. We haven't told our friends and family we are trying but doesn't stop me from getting upset. FB def doesnt help at all. Baby pictures everywhere! Ive found it hard because I work with offenders and some which get pregnant at the drop of a hat. Some of them
Are not sure they want a baby, talk about it like they are getting rid of an old pair of trainers, have no jobs, no house and using drugs. Times like that I feel like screaming!!! I had thought about coming off FB but in the middle of organising a baby shower for my sister in law! I often think, will it ever be me?!
I do have a good news story though. One my best friends has been trying for a baby for two years. She has endo, was told she wasn't ovulating enough for free IVF, husband has low sperm count and she's now 20 weeks pregnant! She is my focus and my glimmer of hope that miracles do come true x
Miracle stories definitely help to get through these hard times! At least you have a focus!
I take my hat off to you working with young offenders and children having children!
Like you say facebook is the worse because everyday there seems to be a pregnancy announcment or birth! At the moment I have my sister and three close friends that are pregnant! It makes it harder when the people you want to talk to about it are the people that are making you feel crap, because there is no way that I will be selfish enough to make them feel guilty for being pregnant.
Thankyou so much for replying to me! Im feeling a little more clear headed now, im fairly sure my mood was just the impact of my second zoladex injection.
Goodluck with TTC i wish you all the best!! Xxxxxx
I see the both sides of this equally and the best thing for you to do. Is get off facebook or any social media where you see things like that. Just until this mood passes
As for your sister and anybody for that matter. Each and every person think the universe revolves around them. Right now she is just zoned in to her body and if she voices her opinion on her pregnancy you don't have the right to dampen her mood.
If you replied publicly most likely some people might of thought it an awkward damper situation. You calling her out like that.
I ve been through it. And I've seen it happen so many times. Women trying desperately to get pregnant but they stress and get depressed and focus on the negative and they don't concieve BUT as soon as they "give up" and are enjoying life they get pregnant!! One has PCOS and endo they told her absolutely no chance of having a baby she did ivf and everything she could think of she finally accepted it that it's just not meant to be and got pregnant after stopping treatments, she now has a lovely two year old girl.
Just accept it and things will happen on there own time with you don't look at everyone else having babies because that will cause you stress and make it harder for you to concieve. I know it's hard but also don't take comments to heart because no they are not trying to hurt you on purpose.
And enjoy going to the baby shower get into the good spirit it brings celebrating a life about to be born. and just that. Keep it in your mind that soon it will be your turn
I know I have no right to dampen the mood of anyones pregnancies and thas why im staying well out of the way. Me and my sister have underlying issues anyway but the pregnancy has just made things ten times worse, especially at a time when I could do with my mums support but cant talk to her because i cant make her feel guilty about being excited about being a gran.
Not focusing on pregnant women / babies is easier said than done. I mean im not breaking down in public over it but on some occasions it does just make you sad.
Theres always hope And thats what im focusing on the most.
Im glad your friend got her little girl in the end xxx
I apologize that I caused you to feel the way you did I really am, from the bottom of my heart.
I just want you to know that anything is possible
My friend went through the same with her monster in laws because they purposely threw everthing in her face about their pregnancies and while she was trying to concieve and while pregnant to avoid the stress she did avoid all those people who brought negativity towards her. She doesnt regret it one bit because she got a wonderful baby at the end.
Keep your chin up and if you already know the way your sister is handling it then you will be the only one to know what to do.
Again I apologize I wish there was a better way to truly tell you how it was all really meant to come out.
Its okay I totally understand that you didnt try to come across negative! xx
it is easier said than done when it comes to not taking it too much to heart. I have been told by the consultant that I will never be able to have children, and I felt so low and was so alone that it didn't help that when I (and this was after a few months from the diagnosis and 1st op) confided in a friend she went on about wanting children, hoping that she would get pregnant soon with her 1 week boyfriend and I thought how insensitive can you be.
Its clear that you and your sister have underlying issues to from the lack of understanding and support but for her to post an attention-seeking status were you and others of her friends and acquaintances (who may also be finding it difficult to conceive or can't have children) is just selfish. You have a right to feel the way you do. It really isn't fair and I do hope that you have your happy stage of being able to have a child one day.
Sure, its great that your sister is pregnant but she should also be sensitive to your own feelings, particularly when she knows about your condition. Its really unfair on your mum to be in the middle of this too. She can't support one over the other but maybe, if you feel that you have a good relationship with your mum and that she is reasonable enough to understand and support you, you could talk to her about how you feel over a coffee so that if there are any problems that arise from you not going to the baby-shower event for example, you can at least have someone to bat in your corner and tell your sister that you aren't being selfish or a bitch or the bad one because you resent her being pregnant and refuse to share her happiness. Its that you are emotionally fragile around this particular subject because of reasons a, b and c -- although of course, I don't know your sister so it could be taken at the negative by her but then that would show others how unreasonable SHE is by not understanding how you are feeling and how much endometriosis is affecting you.
You know what is best for you. If you need to go off social media sites for a while or minimize your contact with your sister then do what is best for you -- your emotional and physical health is more important.
Thankyou because I really had no idea how to react to this post, i wasnt sure if my being upset by it was just my mood being irrational, as I feel as thought i'm pretty touchy towards this subject as it is!
It is hard finding people who understand, and the one thing during my sisters and my three close friends pregnancies that I have tried my hardest to do is put myself in their shoes and imagine how i would feel if I had someone in my ear making me feel bad about having a baby just because they might not be able to, and so ive been good to all three of them and my sister making sure ive bought gifts and sent my congratulations, however as ive said above my sister hasnt been as understanding or sensitive as my other friends which is the worst bit about all this.
I wont be going to the babyshower and i just hope that my feelings towards my new nephew will eventually become positive as right now more than anything i feel like such an awful person for not feeling anything but jealousy, bitterness and sadness towards that baby who has done absolutely nothing wrong.
Thank you for replying here its made me feel far more rational about how i felt this morning when i read this comment.
Me and my partner are going at this with open eyes and hearts and hope that one day we will become parents. We are both young now (22 and 23) and hope that if we struggle to concieve by the end of the year we will be able to get as much help as possible from the nhs.
Im so sorry to hear about your sister! It sounds like she is lucky to have a sister who understands though and is fighting her corner for her!
I want to say thank you to both of u for ur advice and best wishes!
You have both made me feel that much more rational about my feelings! It has genuinley been making me feel awful that im not as happy for my sister as I perhaps should be, and maybe thought my reaction to her facebook post was a bit over the top, but at least from reading this advice I can feel slightly more at ease that im not the only person that feels it was insensitive of her and that my reaction was more than called for.
Me and my mum arent the closest but it wud still be nice to have some emotional support from her, i think she finds it hard to understand because she had my sister at 16 so the idea of struggling to have a baby has never occurred to her, and like you have both said, unless you have been through it then you cant even imagine how it feels! Even just the possibility of not being able to concieve is heart breaking. When we were growing up it was always me that wanted to be a mum, i had the dolls and the kitchen toys etc, my sister wanted to go to africa on safari and never wanted kids... Now look at us she has two and i have none.
Hopefully i will be lucky enough to have a miracle baby like some of the other ladies on this forum, but i refuse to ignore the fact that its a possibility/ more likely for us to have a struggle to get there, so ignoring it is the worst thing for me to do, because I wont get help otherwise and could miss out on my dream of being a mum!
As for social media ive restricted the people i need to, so that i can enjoy talking with friends and family still but not (hopefully) have to see any of the baby stuff!
Ive never really thought about it that way, and its definitely made me feel better towards the situation.
The jealousy is probably more aimed at my sisters life than at the baby itself, but tbh i try and stay out of her life anyway as we live 250 miles apart its pretty easy to do
My thinking toward the baby shower is "would she come to mine" and the fact she missed my 18th, 21st and graduation from uni tells me she would miss my babyshower too, so il send a gift with my mum and explain why i cant go and if thats not good enough then so be it. Like i say its not like its just across the road and i could go home when i feel like it, its a good 3/4 hour journey.
I think the lady above was trying to play devils advocate too, and i appreciate input and opinions from all sides, so im not angry for her response it just wasnt what i wanted to hear, but sometimes thats what we need. Maybe i do need a good shake and told not to be so selfish and to get over myself every now and again.
Awww honey I know how you feel! Over Christmas we went to Manchester to see my dads family & my cousin was there with his girlfriend who is due to give birth on the 30th of this month. Was really hard for me seeing that because me & my man have been trying for over 2 years now & still no luck. Especially when everyone was asking if they could feel the baby kick, & asking stuff like whats he going to be called & if they have everything sorted. Loads of people I know have had babies recently & there have been a few who have just moaned about it because they didnt want a baby yet & I almost feel like telling them that they are so lucky because some of us can't have kids.
At the end of the day you've at least tried to congratulate her, & that whole facebook status thing was pretty insensitive on her part- how can you help being upset at something like that? The fact that she doesnt even text to ask you how your treatment is going yet you are expected to ask after her is out of order. She's not the one going through all of the pain & heartache its your choice whether you go to the baby shower & your family should be more understanding- surely they cant just expect you to sit there & act like things are fine when its obvious that its painful for you.
My family arent exactly the most understanding either- my parents are being really nasty to me sometimes over the fact that I need so many hospital & doctors appointments acting like its such a big inconvenience to them even though its my fiance who looks after me & takes me to all of my appontments & sits in hospital with me. They don't have to do anything yet they act like its them who have the hardest part.
I totally understand why you needed a rant hun, we all do at times & it really sounds like your sister needs to grow up & your family need to be more understanding. If you need to talk then feel free to message me xxx
I'm so sorry to hear you have had such a struggle the last few years too! People honestly need to be more educated on endo and the real damage it can do to our lives! Other women who can just get pregnant willy nilly just dont seem to understand how painful it is when you aren't able to do the one thing a female body is supposed to do!!
One of the main things i find hard is watching my parents get excited because I honestly thought it would be me and my partner giving them their next grandchild. I feel like its not just me i let down in not having a baby, i can see the love and hope in both my parents and my other halfs parents eyes when they look at their grandbabies, and i can see how much they love those babies parents for giving them the opportunity to be grandparents. I want all of that! Its really Not just the pregnancy stuff that hurts its all aspects of it.
I appreciate everyones support from this post, and letting me rant on and on!
Its so nice having this forum to vent on!
Everyone is so nice and offers such inspirational stories and help, and when people dont have stories to tell they are just there for you as someone to listen! Its great to have when your feeling so rubbish!!
I hope that you and your partner get some positive news soon and that you get to have all the exciting baby/ pregnancy moments that so many other women get to have!
Thankyou so much hun we still hope that one day we'll get a miracle but it still doesnt make the pain & the struggle any easier. It makes me so bloody angry when I see people who just get pregnant so easily & dont want the baby. There does need to be more education on how badly endo can affect people like us, half the people I know havent even heard of it!
My mum wants grandkids & she just doesnt seem to understand that it isnt just a simple case of getting pregnant or having ivf- I sometimes feel so awful because she just cant seem to understand how hard this is for me & all the other women in this sitaution. She makes comments like "well I guess its up to your brother to give me grandkids, & it's not like that will happen anytime soon!" & it really hurts! Its almost like she thinks I'm doing it on purpose.
Thats the thing I love about this forum- we're all able to relate. I've found that when I need a good rant the support on here is amazing. I decided 2 years ago to delete my facebook account because I was so sick of going on there & seeing people posting their ultrasound photos & whingeing about how hard their lives were because they were pregnant (plus all of the other insensitive things) & I dont miss facebook at all- its amazing how much things like that affect us!
I really hope that you & your partner get some happy news soon you sound like you need it & deserve it xxx
As for your mum, mine is the same, I dont think they realise they are doing it half the time. They definitely dont understand, especially if they arent living with you and seeing your pain everyday or attending any appointments with you. Im just so lucky that I have a very understanding and amazing boyfriend, hes stuck by me for the last six years and I feel like we can get through anything life throws at us now. Hopefully it will throw some rainbows at us even when its got to rain though!
Living 200miles from home means facebook is the main way for me to see how my friends and family are doing, but im sure i will reach a point where il either accept what people are posting or il just delete it and not care anymore! Welldone you though for taking control and doing something about it!!
Goodluck with everything for the future! May your rainy days be filled with plenty of rainbows! Xxx
That does seem to be the case with alot of people- if they dont know how it feels to go through something then they often dont understand & dismiss it. It's good that your man is there for you mine is the same- really dont know where I would be without him.
Ah yeah I understand the distance thing when it comes to having facebook- 200 miles is a long way! The best of luck to you too honey & thankyou so much hope you get your rainbows in the rain xxxx
Id be exactly the same as you hun! ! I get jealous when I see people being pregnant, coz I always think I may never have that opportunity, its horrible when its in your face too, I hope you do have a baby in the future though, love Laura xx
Dunno if you are being sarcastic, but being in such a negative world. Everyone deserves a bit of optimism don't you think?
I apologize, I did not know really going into this in what stage she has her endo. My friend has stage 3 she is trying to concieve yet again and her doctors were surprised she even got pregnant the first time. That lil girl is her miracle. She had tried for 6 yrs.
I had tried for 3 yrs I was told I had a 20% chance of having a baby on my own and if I did it would be hard to keep him in since I do not have my cervix ( removed due to cervical cancer)
Anything is possible scientific facts or not. Yes I believe you but there have been cases that you wouldn't even believe.
It just gets to me that we are getting to a point in society that we can't voice our opinions. And it's just that an opinion Or thought. Her sisters comment was of her own thoughts and didn't think it would cause anyone pain because at the end it's said in good humor.
And it was a really low blow announcing that I already have kids( and it was hard each and every time), so just cause of that I should not have a thought be heard because of it?
Hiya hun I know exactly what this feels like except it was my fiancés sister who was pregnant. I actually screamed and broke down in tears when I found out she was pregnant (with a guy who she knew for 6 months) oh and I may add this was her miricale baby after she lied about fertility problems... (Major attention seeking issues) which looks like your sister has, no ofence but if that was my sister pregnant or not id pardon my language bollock her!! And id tell my mother with no hesitation how you feel because she loves you both the same it won't make her feel awkward but she will understand and probably agree that that is an awful thing for your sister to say. This even makes me angry my finances sister made up lies and was so bloody precious during her pregnancy I used to just think about how much I resented her day in day out. It was hard to find people to bitch to because they didn't even understand. And like you she never ever ever asked how my treatment on zoladex was going. I've never felt more resentment in my life as I did in those 9 months. Thinking about it now I wish I never let it get to me as I think our friendship has now totally changed now and because I never showed interest we don't have anything in common anymore.
It's hard now aswell she has the baby and I think it's effected my bond with my niece I don't feel comfortable with her at all. Usually I really good with babies I love them but my niece nope i go to bits and feel like a fool as it's not her fault her mother was an incensitive cow during the pregnancy who I avoided because of that reason lol.
What I'm trying to say is get your feelings out in the open now as this really is your niece / nephew who your resenting for being their when it's not their fault and you don't want your relationship with your sister to break down. She's your sister and even if you have a massive argument she's going to want you to be happy for her I know I want my sister to be happy for me and I know my sister would also feel like an idiot once id made it clear to her how I felt. She may be a stubborn cow about it but Id not want it to effect our relationship and by getting your feelings out in the open the anger hopefully won't ruin your relationships xxxxx good luck hun xxxxx
Yeah thats the main thing im worried about- resenting my nephew, because like you i am actually really good with kids and just seem to have a knack with how to look after them, so this is the strangest feeling for me. Two years ago my boyfriends brothers gf got pregnant 'by accident' and when i found out about her i was devastated and I hadnt even been thinking about having a baby very long then, so two years later with it being my own sister now and to have been facing the prospect of not having a baby two years on its even harder, however i love my bfs neice to bits and although I feel sad after ive seen her, wondering what it wud be like it she was our little girl, i wouldnt want our lives without her, so im hoping thats how il feel with my nephew when he eventually arrives!
I made my feelings towards my sister pretty clear at the weekend and all my mum had to say was "now now girls calm down" and laughed. I guess that was probably the best way to handle it from her point of view so she wasnt taking sides but it still hurt because to me this is absolutely NOT funny!
Some women can be complete cow bags though and will do anything to get some attention, i just hope that if / when i finally get pregnant i will be sensitive to the people around me! I guess its pretty easy to get caught up in ur own little pregnant bubble but id like to think il be considerate of people around me, especially if i know i have a close friend or family member who is struggling with conception.
Thanks for replying hun, i will try and have a good heart to heart with my mum next time she fones!
We have another nephew awell and when I found out they were pregnant I was abit miffed as I thought we would have a baby first but I never even really knew that I could have problems. So I love him to pieces we have such a loving relationship but with our niece I don't know I just don't feel like we have a proper connection it's horrible. I'm hoping when she's older and toddling it will be better.
No it's not funny at all really but like you said people get in a pregnancy bubble and I think infertility is one of those taboo topics which just makes everyone feel uncomfortable and nobody will talk about so they shrug it off and don't realise the real emotion that comes with it.
I hope so to I can't wait to be pregnant if I'm lucky enough. I'm
Sure we will both be sensitive whenever we get any delightful symptoms like sickness and not moan and fingers crossed I hope nobody close to me ever goes through this but if they do il be there for them xxx good luck with your heart to heart I'm sure she will understand she's probably trying her best not to take a side but she doesn't need to all she needs to do is listen to you ❤️
Hello, Im going through a similar stage myself right now, I'm having my second batch of zoladex in few weeks I was diagnosed severe endo and on my bowel 3 weeks ago but what I mean more is the heartache, my cousin who is like a sister is pregnant and my boyfriends sister is pregnant, 5 days apart! I can't get away from pregnancy talks and bumps! I see them all the time, I am so happy for them, it's a wonderful thing but the jealousy is unreal, I look at them and cry on the inside! Such a natural thing for a woman and there's a possibility we can't do it, I know how you feel. It's easy for people to say to you, don't worry you'll be fine, I get that constantly, the only positivity I really listen too is other endo sisters, they know the pain, heartache but some have been given the gift and there's no reason we might not be one of them. So I am going on hope, every one needs hope, don't loose it.
I hope your zoladex treatment is going well so far! I had my second one last week and so far have only had one mood swing episode the worst side effect for me at the moment is being nauseous alot, but hey if i want to get pregnant i best get used to it hey? I keep telling my friends this is just like a really long prenancy.. Rather than it being nine months its just a bit longer because i have to focus on the build up before conception which other women dont necessarily get. Its definitely harder when you are surrounded by other pregnant women, but like you say, with hope it makes it easier!
Keep focusing on your dreams and eventually they will become a reality; even if its the long path you have to take. Dorothy got to Oz and look at all the witches and obstacles she had to face! Xxx
I use to hate it before I found out I had endo and people use to moan about their pregnancy as if it was an illness. If only people could feel our pain! X
I completly understand im the only once out of 4 who hasnt had any kids im young bur its hard seeing them pregnant and seeing the little ones grow and knowing u may never be able to have that its hard but ive always tried to hide it. My dad even makes coments like 'never have kidsthere a nightmare' I had my laproscopy 2 weeks ago and he made horrible coments about how I got it nobody understands what its like to have endometriosis untill they have it I suffer with pollycystic ovaries too people think its nothing but u never really know u till u go through it urself I hope one day it happens for u!
Hey Andys_girl how is it going now? I was reading your comments and was thinking about the positives you could take from this. You may not yet have your own little bundle of joy but you are an AUNTY. My sister does not have children and gets her fill from being the most amazing aunty. My kids absolutely adore her. They ring her and bug her all the time. they talk about her constantly and if something happened to my husband and I...they say she would be there second mum. She gets so much joy from them and they give so much in return. It might not be how you saw things, but there is a little bub so open to love and so willing to give love back, I would hate to see you miss such an amazing opportunity. All the best on your journey x
When I just read your post it was like I wrote it about my own experiences. I had a miscarriage at the same time my sister fell pregnant, me and my partner found it to be the hardest situation we had ever been in, everything was made to be about her and deep down with us we were so jealous and angry and found her to be so insensitive in things she did like posting her progress on Facebook and tagging me in. I just think that they haven't been where we are and will never feel the sadness and emotions that we will, they only see one side of it and that is the side that we can only dream of! Not the constant heartache and jealousy. My sister does not ask about my treatment either, j don't know if she feels awkward or just doesn't care!! I had an operation Monday and didn't even get a good luck text!! I just think people don't know how to be around us and almost try and blank out that there is even an issue - at the end of the day it doesn't affect them so to speak so I think when you go through this kind of grief you truly do find out who your nearest and dearest are. If they want to be selfish and rub it in your face, I don't see any problem with you keeping your distance. If they have a problem, let them confront you and be honest and explain that you only want to surround yourself with the support you need right now. I'm sure your mum will understand. If she is anything like my mum, she probably already sees it but doesn't know how to make the situation better. Stay strong and know that you always have support, even if it's not from the ones you seek it from the most. Xxx
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fingers crossed one day she might understand!! Xxx
I was diagnosed severe endo and on my bowel 3 weeks ago but what I mean more is the heartache, my cousin who is like a sister is pregnant and my boyfriends sister is pregnant, 5 days apart! I can't get away from pregnancy talks and bumps! I see them all the time, I am so happy for them, it's a wonderful thing but the jealousy is unreal, I look at them and cry on the inside! Such a natural thing for a woman and there's a possibility we can't do it, I know how you feel. It's easy for people to say to you, don't worry you'll be fine, I get that constantly, the only positivity I really listen too is other endo sisters, they know the pain, heartache but some have been given the gift and there's no reason we might not be one of them. So I am going on hope, every one needs hope, don't loose it.
Feeling sad and anxious about my infertility 
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How do I deal with a parent that makes me feel guilty about being ill
