Learning to cope with failure: I am so glad I... - Couch to 5K

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Learning to cope with failure

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate
48 Replies

I am so glad I did W3, R1 today! For several reasons I couldn’t do it yesterday morning as I had planned, and neither this morning. So I was starting to fear that this would be the beginning of the end, that something inside of me would say “See? You already missed a run. You’re lacking stamina, you will never complete the plan. So you might as well stop the whole thing right now”.

I couldn’t even write to the forum and ask for help because I was afraid that that would maximize the pressure I already felt. Silly me. In the end I went out this evening and did the run, unplanned. And my body didn’t even notice that there had been one extra rest day in between. The three minute runs where tough, but I could do them, and I felt so relieved afterwards!

So I hope I will be wiser in the future and take things a little easier. And ask for your support when I need it. ;-)

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RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBetty
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48 Replies
linda9389 profile image
linda9389Graduate

That's fabulous! It's really hard to have confidence in yourself when it's something new and challenging, but there's nothing to fear here. You'll only get positive support, no pressure; lots of people who've felt the same I'm sure. W3 is quite a step up - I hope you're feeling not just relieved, but very proud of yourself as well 👍🙂

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply tolinda9389

Thank you so much for your kind words! Yes, I'm beginning to feel a bit proud of myself. A little bit! 😉

linda9389 profile image
linda9389Graduate in reply toRunawayBetty

Work on that! You should feel a big bit proud :)

UnfitNoMore profile image
UnfitNoMoreGraduate

I like this post... I think you’ve summed up how a lot of us felt in the early days. I was a little bullish in my posts, but my head was anything but confident. Great job on that run... the mind will get used to it just the same as the legs will.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toUnfitNoMore

Thank you! I feel that I am learning so much more here than just to run!

Bazza1234 profile image
Bazza1234Graduate

There is no such thing as a failed run - any run is simply a prelude to the next run. If you are unable to complete a run as planned , then it is a good preparation for your next attempt.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toBazza1234

Thank you! So true!

Annieapple profile image
AnnieappleAdministratorGraduate

We never fail if we get out and attempt a run. If we don’t finish for whatever reason it’s called a practice run! Lots of people take 2 rest days. This is not a race it’s about building strength & stamina & resting to prevent injury. I personally run Mon Wed & Friday & take 2 days rest at the weekend. I plan to do a park run and then will do Sat instead of Friday. Some people run every second day. Do whatever feels right for you & your present lifestyle.

This forum is amazing & will support and help you without any pressure!

Welcome 👋🏃‍♀️😊

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toAnnieapple

Thank you very much for your kind words, and especially for reminding me that's it's perfectly okay to take two restdays. I have to be a bit careful here anyway because I have MS (don't worry, it seems to be a rather benign form) and useitorloseit already pointed out that having extra rest days might do me good. I keep forgetting though ... ;-)

LeeU profile image
LeeUGraduate

Annieapple has touched on this, you never fail, we don't even allow the use of the F word on here, the only way you fail is when you fail to go out. Runs don't always go to plan and EVERYONE has gremlins telling them they need to stop, they can't do it, etc, so you aren't alone there.

The first time I did C25K I was racked with self doubt, I still get it now, when I went out on my own on Tuesday (I used to be a treadmill only runner but am/have transitioned to running outside) I had gremlins telling me I could stop, no-one would know, it's harder than the treadmill, people will laugh at the fat guy jogging, etc.

I've lied to myself that many times, as my gremlins were telling me to stop, etc, I'd actually say out loud, one more minute. I'd do that until the end of the runs.

A major part in the running process is, I believe, reduction of self doubt, you'll never eliminate it as it's human nature, it's like fear, it's always there ready to make an appearance but you can overcome it.

On your next run, slow down, take it steady and try to think of things that will keep your mind busy, if you listen to music, listen to the lyrics, think about maths problems, etc, anything.

The secret is slow and steady, believe in yourself and trust the program and you will get there.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toLeeU

Thank you so much! You are absolutely right about the F word. I would even go further, because I know that on some days, it will really be impossible for me to go out and run and even that isn't to be considered a failure. If I don't run today, I will run tomorrow. As you say: I just have to trust the program. There are so many witnesses here proving me that it does work!

RunningMigster profile image
RunningMigsterGraduate

Really just want to echo what everybody else has said.

You won the mental battle, you got out there and you did it.

All I'm hearing here is success!

Good your you. We're all here, newbies and graduates to help each other through this.

Proud of you!

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toRunningMigster

Thank you very much for your support! :-) Yes, we will all do this together.

GoGo_JoJo profile image
GoGo_JoJoGraduate

Bravo!! See! I always say this programme teaches us so much more than just how to run, if we let it!

Those pesky gremlins have been allowed to rule us for so long it can be incredibly difficult to realise that they only win as long as we let them.

You're getting stronger in every way 💪🏻👍🏻😁

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toGoGo_JoJo

Yes, this programme is really awesome. Thank you!

Buddy34 profile image
Buddy34Graduate

I think we all feel a bit like this sometimes especially near the beginning I know I did. But you went out and you ran and you should be so pleased. So keep posting and keep running. Well done you 😊

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toBuddy34

Thank you very much, I will keep running! :-)

IannodaTruffe profile image
IannodaTruffeMentor

This post about mental attitude may help healthunlocked.com/couchto5...

You can do this.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toIannodaTruffe

Thank you for the link, great article! What moved me especially was what you called the "calming voice of your coach". To be honest, I always saw coaches not so much as calming and supporting, but as those frightening people yelling at me to make me feel bad and try harder. You, Laura, and all the friendly people over here prove me wrong. :-)

Alast profile image
Alast

RunawayBetty, as others have said, a big well done to you for getting out and doing it, you should feel proud of yourself. I'm also a week 3 runner and at the start of the week, the thought of having to run for 3 whole minutes seemed impossible, but then only a few weeks ago, the thought of running only 60 seconds felt the same! You may have seen that I've asked advice about distraction techniques to help me through (or into) the longer running periods and I've had some really useful advice for the community of new friends I have on here who I have never met. The support from this forum is fantastic, not just from runners in the same boat/at the same level as us, but from graduates who are happy to give advice and reassure us that they too felt just the same way as we do at this stage. I find that very inspiring. When I started C25K I took the title of the course too literally and expected that in 9 weeks time, I would be running 5k easily, than I started week 1! Now (with the advice & support I've received) I have readjusted my sights and KNOW that I will go from being couch bound to being able to run non-stop for 30 minutes, eventually, I've set no timer limit on that. I am attacking each week and will not move on until I have completed the three runs (& rest days) consecutively. If I find I'm struggling, I may drop back a week (or more if necessary) to something I know I have already done to rebuild my confidence, for me this I think is more of a mental battle than a physical one (the physical side of the challenge will be sorted by the programme). Keep at it, we can all do this!

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toAlast

Thank you Alast! Yes, you are right, together we can all do this!

RunningStN profile image
RunningStNGraduate

Thank you for posting this! Sometimes life just gets in the way and there’s no time to run. Well done for getting out there and completing w3, r1 you should be proud of yourself! This forum is great and you’ll never receive any negative replies (in my experience) 💕

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toRunningStN

"Sometimes life just gets in the way" - yes, that's it exactly! Thank you!

GreenLizard profile image
GreenLizardGraduate

Hi Betty well done! I am a great procrastinator and have had many times when I have delayed or postponed runs, sometimes for days 🤪 But I have done them, often with the support from this wonderful group of people. As a result I have developed the ‘muscle’ of doing what I say I am going to do for myself - now I have started to do other things too! So doubly proud.

Some one said earlier “we don’t use the F word on here”! I love that. Practice runs, a little delayed runs but no Fs 😁

Wishing you a lovely day 🌞

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toGreenLizard

Thank you! Reading all these lovely comments really makes it a wonderful day! :-)

Maisiecat1 profile image
Maisiecat1Graduate

Runaway Betty well done! I started week 3 run 1 on Tuesday and it was quite challenging for me, so I didn't enjoy it. This got into my head, like the other posts explained (our own gremlins!) however, I completed run 2 of week 3 yesterday and it was fantastic. When Sarah said my 3min run had finished and I could walk I said 'but I've still got some run left in me" I faced my gremlins and achieved. I'm now looking forward to the final run in week three. We are together with this one and we can do it. There is so much lovely encouragement on this forum and we are not alone in our struggles. Keep it going and enjoy.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toMaisiecat1

Thank you so much, and well done you too! :-)

Wenderwoo profile image
WenderwooGraduate

So glad you did it, and I bet it feels great! For both the achievement, and for beating the gear. Well done you 😁

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toWenderwoo

Thank you! :-)

Wenderwoo profile image
WenderwooGraduate in reply toRunawayBetty

That should say fear, not gear! I have sausage fingers today!

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toWenderwoo

Ah, what a relief! I wouldn't want to beat my gear right now - in fact, yesterday I ran with my new running tights on and they did a great job! ;-)

Candy46 profile image
Candy46

Fab post......so glad you went for the run 🏃‍♀️. I have often felt like this and have learnt to tell myself ‘I’ll just do one more run.....I’ve just finished week 5 on this basis 🙈😂😂. Cx

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toCandy46

Thank you, and well done you! :-)

backintime profile image
backintimeGraduate

Runing is great in that you can fit it around life. There is no class that starts at 8pm sharp, no one counting your runs except you.

Procrastination is something I fight against...I am an expert procrastinator, but I am always happy when I beat it. Sometimes stuff happens too and you can't squeeze it in. The next day is another day and another possibility to run. You can do it !

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply tobackintime

Yes, that's exactly what I thought after doing my post run stretches yesterday. It felt like having been to a class, only that I did it on my own, without any schedules. Thank you! :-)

Elfe5 profile image
Elfe5Graduate

Ooooh RB, don’t say the F word - Mummycav will run after you brandishing a bar of soap!! 😂😂

You are doing brilliantly, - I can’t see an F anywhere! 😄 Be proud of yourself- infact be “chuffed to bits”, turn a few cartwheels, surprise your friends & families with high 5s etc!! 😂 😄😄

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply toElfe5

Thank you! :-) I will eventually turn cartwheels - only for now I am keeping it secret and have only told my two closest friends about C25k. I think this will change once I have completed week 6 ... But yes, on the inside, I am already turning more than one cartwheel! ;-)

Run46 profile image
Run46Graduate

Brilliant, well done🏃‍♀️👏

We've all got our gremlins that try to keep us lazy when the weather's bad, or life gets in the way but we also know how great we feel when we get out there and run...keep going, you've got this 🤨

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate

Thank you, and yes - it does feel great indeed! :-)

useitorloseit profile image
useitorloseitGraduate

Don't get hung up on timetables! I took double the time to complete C25K, and still run as and when it's convenient, not because it says I have to in the diary! Chill out, relax and run when you can. Just don't give up through lack of motivation - check in to the forum and encouragement to motivation is always forthcoming!!!

Alast profile image
Alast

Well done for sneaking out & doing it before your body realised what was going on! For me I am sure that this programme is 75% mental training and 25% physical (and I'm finding the physical bit difficult!). Keep on keeping on at your own pace, you will get there. Don't be afraid of posting on here either, you shouldn't feel any more pressure, just more encouragement...

(Oops! Sorry, I didn't realise I'd already posted a response to this earlier. I'll not delete this though as I've made another point, plus I need the typing practice!)

useitorloseit profile image
useitorloseitGraduate

Hey RB - I SOOO didn't feel like running today, but I thought about you and gave myself a stern talking to. Went out. Did it. Job done. Thanks!!!

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply touseitorloseit

Oh, that's great!! 😊 👏Well done you, you must be so proud now!! And you made me very proud as well, thank you so much! 🤗

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply touseitorloseit

This morning I wondered if I should really go out and run today or better do it tomorrow. Then I thought that you had taken me as an example, so I'd better take you as an example, too. It was so nice, bright sunshine, 0 degrees. Thank you! 😊

But promise me that this isn't the start of a new challenge! We'll go nice and easy as always. And no matter if we run or not, we will always be awfully lovely people. No need to feel guilty about anything! 😉

useitorloseit profile image
useitorloseitGraduate

Well done missis! Today is cruddy weather in Wales. I haven't been out the door. I sat by the Aga and scanned old family photos. I got a bit grizzly after a while, so have made myself a nice pot of tea, lit the fire and am cheering up a bit now. It just makes me realise I should chuck out all my memorabilia before I snuff it so that my son doesn't have to sort through it all.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply touseitorloseit

I know what you mean ... My father died last year, completely unexpected. I'm still not over it. In the morning I laughed with him at breakfast, the next day he was gone. But my mother is still there, and I think I wouldn't want her to throw away any memorabilia yet. And after all, who says we are going to snuff it anyway? With all that running we are doing!

useitorloseit profile image
useitorloseitGraduate in reply toRunawayBetty

Well I'll have to snuff it at some point!!! Mum's got no marbles left, bless her. We sold their house this year to pay for the care homes, and most stuff went to tip or charity, but it's the personal stuff which is hard to part with. Thank goodness for scanners and digital storage! Shame we can't scan cuddles and play them back.

RunawayBetty profile image
RunawayBettyGraduate in reply touseitorloseit

You are really going through tough times there! It must have been so hard for you to sell your parents' house, give their stuff away, and see them slowly leaving you. And I'm so with you with the cuddles! I'm only glad that my father's cuddles are still stored in my brain, together with his voice. Miss him!

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