Firstly I just wanted to say thank you for all your kind words and advice. I have read everyone and did take it on board.
I felt good today so decided to go to the park. I made it only 13 minutes and 0.8 miles before I let my brain win again.
I found a tree, sat near it had a little cry and then walked back to the car.
I really feel like I've lost it now, that the enjoyment I had, the fantastic feeling when I completed a run has now just gone. And the bloody garmin that my OH bought me for christmas arrived today. Poor bloke.
I really wanted to be good at something, to be able to achieve something. I've done 3/4 5k's now so I can do it, but something a switch has clicked in my brain. Everything hurts, my calves, my feet my hips and I just give up.
Maybe this is it, maybe this is all I was meant to do and I'm meant to just crawl back into whatever hole I came out of. I don't know.
I just really wanted to be good at this. Just to do it would be nice right now, not fast not slow not anything.
Anyway, I'm off before I depress you all with my self pity!! lol
Thanks for all your advice in the past, and good luck with all you future runs.
For those of you are working your way through the programme, Please don't read this and think this is how it is. It is a fantastic programme and it worked for me for a time. Look at all these wonderful people and look at what they have achieved. You'll follow in their foot steps I'm sure.
Have a good christmas everyone.
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Sounds like you need a hug ! And maybe it might be time for a wee checkup at the GP ? Maybe you're coming down with something (after all its flu season), or maybe there is something niggling away in the background that needs to be dealt with. (Someone here has mild anaemia, there are others with low thyroid - that sort of thing is hard to pick up but can really knock you). Why not take Christmas week off, then go out next weekend with just the goal of running for 10 minutes. You will do it easily, then you might decide to aim for 12 or 15 the next time. Would be such a shame to waste that lovely Garmin !
Have you got someone you could run with ? Maybe you could do with a bit of real-time help to battle those gremlins. The problem you seem to have is a loss of confidence rather than a loss of ability. I think ajwyld's advice to take a weeks break is a good idea, but don't give up...
I have got a 10K beginners programme that I am going to tackle in the New Year if I can. The first week requires 3 10 minute runs. If you can run 13 mins you're already started on a 10k programme !! Any run is better than no run, please keep going...
Oh no! Don't give up You are good at it. You've done it and you can do it again! It's really horrid if you feel like that but perhaps when you're through this patch you'll get that loving feeling back again. You didn't ONLY make 13 mins - you did it in spite of how you were feeling. That sounds like a success to me even if you think it's only a little one and it's 13 more minutes than if you'd stayed at home on the couch. So I say well done!!
Whatever you decide to do have a fantastic Christmas and maybe things will look a little brighter come the New Year xx
I happen to agree agree about having a word with your gp. I have thyroud issues and iron/ferritin issues, all make running a little bit harder for me. If you have anything like that going on if you get it sorted the. Running actually becomes a bit easier. All through the program I have found little health niggles that I never knew I had. I have been running for 1 1/2 years now and I am another run/walker/run my body just loves it so much more. It wasent until I found my feet with that I actually started to feel like a runner. Take a week off, learn how to use your new toy and you and your new garmin buddy for a fun run, no pressures and no beating yourself up. Anything goes.
Good luck with all your future runs too - because there will be many of them - You have done it once and you will do it again - A couple of weeks ago things conspired to give me some dreadful runs and I know that feeling of 'will I ever be as good as I was and will I ever improve?' - it is physically debilitating. I got over it and so will you. You have succeeded and therefore are good at this and will get better at it. Everyone who is good at something goes through bad periods and periods of doubt as well. The only failure you can possibly have is to give up. So take all the good advice and stick at it because it only takes one good run to wipe away all of the bad ones. Happy Christmas
Here now..as my dear Dad used to say.... steady yourself. ...are you sure you're physically well? I ran around like an eejit for 6 weeks with a severe bronchitis and I felt like I was running backwards. You're clearly no eejit and perhaps you're finding it tricky to settle into a pace that will get you to continually run for longer times. There are running clubs that are for beginners....maybe see if there is one in your area and there might be someone who could run with you and then advise about what sort of pace works for you. I think taking a break is a good idea and maybe start again when the weather is better and there is more light around.. take it easy babe!!!
dont give up, you've already done C25K, sooo, if you are not able to do it at the moment then maybe you're sick, and need to check with your gp, or maybe you just need a few days rest.
Why not go back to one of the earlier C25K podcasts until you're feeling better?
Don't give up. You've already proven that you can do it. It actually took me a good 12 months to really enjoy running. Out of the eight 5ks that I have done since March, I have only really truly enjoyed the last 3. This is because I stopped comparing myself to other runners and began running against myself. That thinking made the biggest difference in my running. I enjoy running by myself because it puts no pressure on me, and I am a slow runner doing an average 17 min mile. It's only recently that I've been able to completely run a 5k, but if I need to walk some of it, so what. At least I'm doing something for myself.
Get out there and use that new Garmin!
It really does sound like time to see the doc.....
Please dont give up! You did it before, we all have blips. You need to do what you can for YOU not for anyone else. Where do you live? if its close by we could buddy up? I have no one to run with
email admin and let them know. I live in Weymouth, dorset.
I've just been reading AndyDs post about exercise induced asthma, could that be your problem? Chwck out that thread anyway
Don't give up - you really are being far too hard on yourself! You are an inspiration to others just be getting out at all not forgetting that you already have that graduate badge. Who but you cares that you are not keeping going for 30 minutes solid? So what? You know you could if you had to - what you should be doing now is to look for some satisfaction and enjoyment from it all. Do you have a parkrun nearby? How about going along and volunteering, if you don't fancy running. Then try a run - you will be amazed at how many people you will pass who will be walking well before 13 minutes are up and these will be people who do parkrun every week; but they won't be beating themselves up! They are doing it for fun. I think once you can get the pressure to perform off your shoulders you will find things improve. Having said that, a check-up wouldn't hurt, just to make sure you are not struggling with something fixable.
Even if you don't feel like it, go out again and as you run, make yourself smile (perversely, I found this helped my breathing). Don't go out to run for 30 mins; go out to do 6x 5mins runs with 1 min walk between each 5 mins. It's cold out there and the cold makes it harder if you are not used to it, so starting with a run/walk session will help accliamatise to the weather. Celebrate that you got out there rather than focussing on self imposed targets. I found once I'd graduted, running for 30 mins was much harder, because it was only me, not the program, that was saying I had to do it - and there are still days when I get 10 mins in and decide it was a bad idea and go home! I don't regard these as failures, just bad run days. The only fail would be in not getting out again another day.
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You are good at it. You've done it and you can do it again! It's really horrid if you feel like that but perhaps when you're through this patch you'll get that loving feeling back again. You didn't ONLY make 13 mins - you did it in spite of how you were feeling. That sounds like a success to me even if you think it's only a little one and it's 13 more minutes than if you'd stayed at home on the couch. So I say well done!!
Life after graduation 
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Graduated today!
