SOGGY BOTTOM!!

SOGGY BOTTOM!!

Mary Berry would have been appalled. I committed the ultimate GREAT BRITISH BAKE OFF sin today by getting a soggy bottom. Not you understand due to any physical ailments, but due to the lashing rain! It was like the end of the world out there this morning......

I awoke hearing the rain pounding the roads outside, the drain trying to cope with copious amounts of water as a river flowed down our road. I turned over and went back to sleep. There was no rush today and if I slept another hour or so, it might back off a little.

Blimey, was I wrong! When I did rise and put on my lycra catsuit (well, I may be exaggerating slightly.....nike top, long sleeved plastic top, running tights with orange go faster stripe and Asics) I realised that I had to go out into the miserable wet weather no matter what. I'd planned a 10, but mentally my mind was telling me other things like ; "Are you bloody mad mate? 10K in this weather? You're a total loon!"

NO matter. I whispered goodbye to Mrs Dan and opened the front door. "This is NOT going to be a good hair day" I said to myself - and set off. Within 8.3 seconds I was drenched. It was chilly too but I didn't mind that so much as I knew I'd warm up when I got going. I reached my "Start" point (a very tall lamp post) and set off slowly. A car passed me and just 20 yards ahead of me was a small lake which had formed by the side of the road. The car went through this lake spraying a wall of water about ten feet high across the pavement that I was about to run on. I decided to cross the road and avoid a drenching, despite the fact it wouldn't have made the slightest bit of difference to my soaked state. Once past the obstacle I jogged down to the Thames path and settled into a slow pace along the river. I couldn't believe quite how many other nutters were out running today - I stopped counting after 7 and reckoned these dudes were hard core. I wonder if they thought that about me? I've never been thought of as hard core before....

I got to about 4K and all was well and I even forgot it was raining. I was soaked through and the rain made loud splatter noises as it dive bombed onto the big leaves lying on the ground. There were hardly any walkers and the few I did see ignored my smiles! Halfway through the 5th I started to tire and my chest got a bit wheezy. The cold I have, clearly hasn't left my body yet and I definitely felt my fitness a bit below par. Passed 5K and onto the 6th.........coughing and clearing my throat a lot now and legs feeling heavy. The 10K I'd hoped for was going to have to be put off for another day. I'd take a rain check on it (see what I did there? Rain? It was raining? No?.....OK.....sh** joke....).

Once I'd decided to just do the 7K which would take me home, my mind settled down and everything seemed to adjust accordingly. I was still tired and pushing as hard as I could, but the effort was huge. This was not an easy run for me, but I put it down to the human body being beaten up by VIcky Virus and I was doing all I could to tell it to **k off and exit my body!

Got in the door and I looked at myself in the hall mirror. It looked like I had been dunked into a giant barrel of water! I was totally soaked through, but pretty warm from the run and Mrs Dan laughed when she saw me. Oscar cat woke up from his position on the sofa and looked at me with wide eyes of derision. You wouldn't find HIM out in the wet. No sirrreee. He was on the sofa and dug in for a 15 hour snooze!! I on the other hand had the most glorious HOT SHOWER! God it was lovely. This was followed by a double fried egg sandwich. YES! TWO eggs! I was ravenous.

So I didn't achieve my goal which was 10K, but I managed 7K in the lashing rain and my chest wheezing a bit and that will do me, thank you very much! The time? Not too shabby actually - 40'57 which averaged out at about 5'40 per K (approx).

I'm going to get into my Tiger Onesie now and look like a complete plonker. But I don't care. It's dark outside, still raining, no colour in the sky at all which is perfect conditions for ONESIE fashion!

Toodle pip and see you next week.

Dan.

41 Replies

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  • ....it's official Dan, you are a complete nutter!

  • Ta daaaa!

  • Fantastic effort - as for onsie - what can I say-----its Greeaat!!

  • Thanks Suzzzzze!

  • Dan is back! Your post is so funny. Vicky Virus? Love it. And don't you look so cute in your onesie?

    Well done on the run.

  • Thanks IP. Vicky Virus is a right cow. She's responsible for quite a lot of upset at the moment....

  • Great stuff Dan, youre a tiger , GRRRR :-D

    Matching slippers n' all ha ha :-) xxx

  • AND GLOVES BABY!!!

  • What a hoot! That really cheered me up. Ta

    I love your tiger outfit!

    I was out doing a 7 k today but it was DRY and the SUN shone. It was dark, grey, wet and miserable early doors and I felt like not bothering too. I did though, as you have to don't you.

    Once you're wet through, getting any wetter doesn't really matter does it. Glad you enjoyed your invigorating shower and double egg sarni. These luxuries take on a whole new meaning now don't they. I had a helping of choc pudding when I got back.

  • Choc pudding trumps egg sarnie. You win!

  • Our hero lives to run another day.......... I was just wondering if you would look very different if you were dunked in a rather small barrel of water, as opposed to the giant one.......just a thought.

  • I would say completely different. But then that's purely down to archimedes principle...!

  • I just nearly wet myself.......you'd scare a panther in that get up!! And a big well done, thats a great distance and a fab time, go have a rest now tiger ;)

  • Haha! Good innit? That's what I'm wearing ALL XMAS!

  • Brilliant post Dan. Nice picture too now I know what I want for Xmas

  • Get one GF. They are the dogs...

  • a tiger, oh my gawd. ;O)

  • Kapow!

  • Love your posts. So funny. Well done you. Loving the onesie. And yes you are quite mad :))

  • One tries one's best of course daaahhhhliiiing!

  • Love your onesie :) Well done for braving the weather...

  • That's bonkers ! Tiger feet too....Stay warm and cosy !!! (Oh and well done for the run, hope you split with Vicky for good soon)

  • Completely bonkers - but cheered me up after a rubbish day at work!

  • There's only one word - BONKERS!

    You did a great run bearing in mind that weather and your hanging-in-there virus - take it steady now, perhaps keep warm and dry for a while.

    Hope to catch you soon

    :) xx

  • Ooh, you have painted your walls Health Unlocked Green!

  • Oh no you've got me singing" tiger feet "now! That will be stuck in my head all night, ! You look very cool dan, my sister brought us all onesies last xmas , including my dad! Welldone on a great effort ! :)

  • That's neat, that's neat , that's neat,, that's neat I really love your tiger feet ! :-D xxx

  • Thats just cruel poppy! :) just been looking at the YouTube video too! :X

  • They did have some top choons didn't they ? :-D xxx

  • We're showing our age! :) love the old choons! :)

  • Yep me too , the golden oldies, cant beat em .... :-) xxx

  • Suspect Oscar had the right idea but WELL DONE YOU!!

  • The wonsee looks too cute. However, although drawn to the cozy idea, I have been put off because, you know, given my age and all, and when the urge strikes I don't move as quickly as I used to. Then I discovered Louise Gray had designed a solution. Just a suggestion .....

    oharadesigns.files.wordpres...

  • What the hell's that ???? :-D xxx

  • Well, it's a variation of this:

    i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/201...

    ...from London Fashion Week last year. But scoff not Poppy, given the recent post about running and runs, I wonder if this could be part of EM's new entrepreneurial jaunt for runners' essentials.

    Did you say BOGOF? :D

  • Want a onesie, but fear you won't get out of it in time? You need a slanket...

    google.co.uk/url?sa=t&rct=j...

  • OMG there is a DOUBLE-SLANKET! Got to have one (a single one: there would be fights). The dogs must have one each. They are brilliant. Have asked Santa to make space on his sled for a bulk order.

    I can, however, still see difficulties with the race to the kharzie ...

  • Have you read the description for the Cream coloured one ? It says and I quote :

    " Perfect for people who spill a lot of yoghurt! "

    Whaa ? How bizarre ! :-) xxx

  • Sorry for off topic but I LOVE THE DECOR OF YOUR HOUSE! You can't beat a nice bright green hehe! Perfect surroundings for a tiger onesie! :D

    Nice run - by the way. "Only" 7k? Tut tut! You did great!

  • Well done for going even though Vicky was being a pain in the arse for you xxxx not too shabby Mr Dan xxxx cute onesie xxx

  • Well done for going even though Vicky was being a pain in the arse for you xxxx not too shabby Mr Dan xxxx cute onesie xxx

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