There was once this chubby bloke right, and ah-ha, he had this bright idea that he needed to start to get fit at forty ........ [big light bulb moment - and the pyrotechnics crackling]
So he thought he should start doing exercise. Slowly he started running, putting himself through the ups and downs with the 9 weeks of C25K. He made friends with Laura, learned what adrenaline was and began to love the total rush as the endorphin kicked in - he even started eating salads & cutting down on the other naughty stuff. He was changing for the good. ..........[happy summer music, bright warm sunshine - twittering birds everything feeling good]
He was helped along the way with encouraging words from his forum friends too - he can do this & as he got more into running he realised that he quite liked it, "running's not that bad". He still didn't think he was very good at it, but he stuck with it and slowly dragged himself up managing to running for an hour at a time, eventually breaking through 1hour20 mins to get to 13km in one run .......... [cue the Eye of the Tiger from Rocky - da, da-da-da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-daaaaaaaaaa, da, da-da-da-da-da, come on fat lad - push it harder - work through the pain - don't ever quit - you can do it - you will beat all odds]
He had only gone and done it - he had become a real runner! ........ [gold light fills the stage as the interval curtain falls - all he can hear is the whistles and cheers as the audience go wild]
..... then the dark clouds of autumn came ..... [thunder clap] and after a few runs in the dark evenings, feeling a bit miserable & very sorry for himself, this little demon chirped up & started telling him that it was too cold & too wet & too dark & too miserable to be out there running. ......... [boooooooo hissssss - evil nasty demon]
Once again there was a space on the couch for him, an enormous television full of programs which needed to be watched, a few bottles of red with his name on, but worse still were the dangerous nicotine filled little fu*#!kers he used to enjoy so much.........[Sad morose bluesy guitar rift - with dark blue stage lighting]
Every week goes by with no running he could feel all of his good work being undone - he was unlearning how to run - he had started trudging along again! - he was in danger of becoming a ex runner ..........[cue more sad music, the single spot light slowly dims as our hero collapses to his knees - then slumps as the light finally goes out!]
But that is not the end of our story boys and girls, oh no. Because in just 8 days time he will have almost two weeks off where he will be see daylight during the day again, where he is not constantly driving to and from work, and he is determined not to loose his inner runner.
He has crawled back up onto his knees, then standing on his own two feet, shielding his eyes from the bright lights, looking straight ahead he can see the tow path once more - HIS tow path.......... he remembers what it was like to be that runner, but it's hiding away somewhere inside him.
So he needs you to help him - he can't do it all on his own - so come on boys and girls - shall we help our hero find his running feet - shall we help to find his inner runner once more ..... our hero takes a bow, thanking his audience and decides it's time slay his demon, time to to end the running drought - 9am Sunday morning, are you going to help him?
..... The End .....