Where to start? Well, it was after lunch on Thursday 31st October when I started to feel nauseous. Blamed the leftovers I had eaten and eventually took myself off to bed. Then the vomiting started. Bright red blood and lots of it. It was stop/start till the morning. Got kiddo off to school and called my GP. Get to hospital now, no time for an ambulance. I swiftly packed an overnight bag as if I was on autopilot. Straight through to be assessed. By this time I really wasn’t functioning properly. I was aware that I was going to have a general anaesthetic, a camera down my throat and that my husband was with me. That was about it. Apparently I was pretty out of it for hours. I remember my daughter-in-law visiting in the evening then I crashed out and slept till the morning.
My husband came in on Saturday and I was still not with it. I couldn’t speak properly or make much sense. He checked if I needed anything and went home to get my current medication and my son. The meds (Spironolactone and Thiamine) were taken off me and I was put on UV vitamins, fluids and Omeprazole. I barely scraped in to the position where a transfusion was put on hold.
On Sunday I was sitting up in bed wearing my pretty blue nightdress and tinted moisturiser. Successful packing, I’d say. I had also packed a full wash kit so was fragrant, too! But starting to become aware that my mental faculties were somewhat lacking.Dangerously low blood pressure and Haemoglobin.
Monday. No food as I was to have an ultrasound scan. After the scan two consultants and five junior doctors nodded sagely and agreed that my mental health was so fragile that I would be better off at home.
So here I am. Able to potter round the house, take my medication etc. But not confident in my speech, spelling or grammar. I find this really frustrating. Then I was told I could have died. I had lost one third of the blood in my body. I went in to shock which I am finding hard to deal with.
One day at a time......
Love Deborah
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Whew, I am so glad you made it to the hospital in time! I think you're coherent, and understand why you are feeling a little balmy due to the blood loss, and the shock. I am concerned about you being home alone, do you have anyone that could check on you regularly, help out a bit with your son? Take care of yourself, hope you continue to do well. xx
I'm so glad they stabilised your varices, and that you got home.
The confusion is something most of us have, and it's bloody frustrating at times, but fortunately for me only happens now and then.
Please take it easy,
David
You must have been really frightened,
Look after yourself the confusion is very annoying, make sure some one is checking on you all the time as I when it happened to me I often thought I was fully with it and was no were near
You are one lucky girl. Take it easy, give your body some time to heal. Get help looking after the family, cooking etc. If people don’t offer then ask then.
Thank you, all. Your words are very comforting. Kiddo is 16 so pretty independent and rather lovely 💞. Husband works long hours but has been amazing. Both sets of parents have been found lacking. In-laws turned up against my wishes and sat like sacks of spuds for three hours without offering even a cup of tea. I asked if they could walk the dog but they declined because it was raining. I have phoned mine twice and they have failed to offer help. I get on. I just do it slowly with rest breaks. I am afraid that is just the way it is with my lot.....
I'm so pleased your hubby and your 16 year old are good. It's a shame both sets of parents are like this, make sure you get plenty of rest. Have you any friends who could walk the dog etc? My heart goes out to you. You are amazing. Love and hugs Lynne xxxx
Doggie was spayed yesterday so picking her up this morning. The house feels so darn empty. Cat was put down on Saturday. Gastric bleed. Empty, empty, empty. Hard for a do-er to rest but I get warning signs. That blackness in front of my eyes when I stand up too quickly. xx Times like this I really miss my ex-in-laws. Dolly would turn up with a big pot of stew, make a brew, ask if I needed anything and then go. God bless her.
Oh , yes . Where do you live, if you don't mind me asking? Lots and lots of love and hugs Lynne xxxx
Ickle village on the Cambridgeshire border. Put it this way, we have to skirt through Bedfordshire to get to our nearest Tesco. xx
Hi
I really feel for you, you've been through so much.
My son went to Anglia Ruskin uni, he is now living with his girlfriend in Milton. So pleased for he has had a rough time with Crohn's but touch wood he's ok at the moment. Love and hugs Lynne xxxx
My daughter-in-law went to Anglia Ruskin. She and my eldest live six doors away. Rather lovely. Like the old days when all family lived in the same village. Middle ‘un lives 10 minutes away. Their dad (God rest him) was a Lancashire lad so maybe they were ingrained with it. xxxx
Yes. My eldest has got a lot if issues re bowel, he's in a lot pain right now, it's ruining his life at present. He had one op which didn't work. To put it bluntly one of his swells when it shouldn't so he is in pain when going to the loo, he's up about 9 times per night. They are now trying a balloon,not sure how it works but he will have colonic irrigation first. He feels that rotten he told his consultant that he would have a colostomy bag if it stopped his pain. Ian had a colostomy bag on in 2014 for 6 months.
He went to Hallam in Sheffield and then Leeds uni for his Master's. We are so proud of our boys. Sorry, I'm getting soppy now.
Hope you sleep well, I getan hour or less sleep per night due to pain. I don't think I'm going to get any tonight ☹️ xxxx
My middle ‘un, now 27, was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes when he was 3. Little niggles are sneaking in. His greatest fear is losing his sight. He is so impossibly beautiful and affectionate.
I sleep quite well generally but family are causing me so much grief. Basically I can’t tell them the root cause (alcohol!) because they would just say I brought it on my self. That is despite my dad being an alcoholic. But they haven’t even picked up the phone 📞.
Love Deborah xx
Hi Debroah,
We are sorry to read how unwell you have been. Well done for getting straight into hospital so fast for treatment.
Hopefully your liver consultant is seeing you again soon to review matters?
Currently caring for large dog who has been spayed. We are on similar diets! Still miss salt though..... 🐾 Thank you for your thoughts. I dropped in to this forum every now and again but I felt fine, you know. But it has well and truly hit home now. I am not invincible! And these people are so amazing. I suppose they understand whereas family don’t understand. I can’t face the ‘serves you right’ scenario. So they don’t know the half of it. But I am still here!
Tried it, not very appetizing. Royal Canin Gastrointestinal low fat. I'm not advertising, very few brands do it. Pancreatic diet for our mutly. 🤔
Hi
Maybe show your family this forum. It's not your fault. Mine was brought on by meds given to me by my Drs over the years but I do understand drinking alcohol can become and addiction which in turn makes it an illness. Please take care of yourself Lynne
The reaction I would get would crush me. I am feeling so sensitive at the moment. Nice little surprise this morning though. Walked in to the kitchen and heard a noise. Turned towards the back door and there was a tabby head poking through the cat flap. Stared at me for a moment and then disappeared. Very sweet.
I am doing my best but I could really do with some help. Steve is being great but he is out from 6am to 6.30pm plus football and training for kiddo. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy in my own company but just a little support would be good. 😢
I do really feel for you. It must be so hard when your family are like this. Could you write your family a letter to see if they could maybe at least read it. Pm me if you need to. Love and hugs Lynne xxxx
It’s a long story but, ask anyone, I have been a good daughter, wife and mother yet my parents have chosen to disinherit me in favour of mummy’s blue-eyed boy who is a waste of space, druggie who still lives at home. Bit of a kick in the teeth. I only wanted a few bits, he is welcome to the house. So I don’t exactly feel loved. 😢. Mother loves spreading falsehoods about me. A long story but no trust there. xx
But you might not get the reaction it sounds like you are dreading. Isn’t it worth a try - surely can’t be worse than the situation you feel you’re in at the moment?
I do hope that you will get some family support - and soon.
Update: Phoned my mother with crib notes in front of me so I could answer questions accurately and, also, put my point and the facts across confidently. She failed to understand what was wrong with emailing me instead of phoning. She and my brother have cried a lot apparently. She would have come over in the middle of the night and called 999 for me!! Why not phone from her house? Did she not think Steve was capable? But I had threatened that if he picked up the phone I would kill him. Probably quite a believable threat the state I was in. He knew he was best to let the realisation sink in and let me do it myself! And, of course, I phoned my trusted GP and he said to get to hospital. I don’t often do as I am told....
In-laws told Steve that I had banned them from ever visiting again (not true, I asked for a few days rest) and have barely been in touch. Apparently this is because mother-in-law has been at their local hospital and has a heart murmur. But she didn’t bother telling me about it, just a clandestine meeting behind my back with Steve and kiddo today. That stinks after I had told her a version of what had happened to me in quite a lot of gory detail.
Am I missing something? Maybe being ill is a competition?
Okay, I didn’t specifically mention alcohol but perhaps you can sort of see why!
I have supportive friends but none live close enough to visit. Two know the absolute truth and are there for me completely. But I have always been stubbornly independent and self-sufficient!
Love to you all. Would have replied earlier today but was caught up reading about mugs of tea on the roof......... School uniform in the freezer? 😂😂😂
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