It's been a week today without alcohol, but I just feel like I'm teetering on the edge, I was so close today, but got through, I know my son in law doesn't want me here, I can't blame him, 2 young children both needing mum and dad, I just feel I'm part of a problem, my daughter has been great, I try to stay out of the way, my grandchildren just want to play all day, even after school the oldest is 4, and the youngest is 2, I'm trying to keep determined, if I go out then all of my family will disown me, I've looked into homeless places, but if I go there I will have gone beyond feeling that I'm at rock bottom, I know the consequences of drinking, but at this minute I can't say I care, I will have lost everyone that loves me, but I can't live like this, I've taken my granddaughters bed while my daughter and son in law have to share a bed with my granddaughter, it's not fair on them, just feel I'm worthless.
Best wishes Jeff x
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Foxman555
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Congratulations on 1 week sober. That in itself is something you should be very proud of. Alcoholism is an illness.....would your son in law feel the same if you had cancer? Maybe you should ask your daughter & her husband to look on this site & read as many posts as possible so they can understand more. This site is full of understanding people who NEVER,NEVER,EVER judge. keep up the good work. xx
Well done on staying dry for a week. Now you must keep it up, for everyone’s sake. Make it two weeks, you can do it!
Hi Jeff. Your daughter and her family have taken you in because they care and have set you ground rules which you must accept in return. It's for your own good. You wouldn't get support like that anywhere else. So respect it. Well done you've got through a week without a drink now get through another 1. The longer you go without it the more you are likely to gain their respect and trust. You give in to that poison again you will be out on your arse and deservedly so.
L x
Hi Jeff, do you ever get that feeling of Déjà vu? This is so hard to break the habit. I know all about that horrible little monster that sits on your shoulder nagging you to have a drink. All those triggers are out there too. You can't even watch a F1 race on the telly without seeing advertising hoardings prompting and teasing you. When you try to avoid these signals, you realise just how many and powerful they are. It will get easier I promise. Just hang on in there and tell yourself that for you alcohol is a poison. That first drink is going to be the one that does all the damage, so don't ever go there. Tell that little demon on the shoulder that it he can't hurt you any more and that your stronger than he is. You are your own man and not a slave to anything, or anyone anymore.
Baby steps Jeff, Baby steps. Soon it'll be two weeks and the next thing you'll know it'll be two months. Then after that, you couldn't go out and buy any booze even if you wanted too because of all that money you'd have been saving, would be weighing you down too much.
Just as an after thought, I've posted up another page on my website. It's meant to be thought provoking and some of the videos I've put together might leave a lump in the throat. But then that's the message I'm trying to portray: taep.co.uk/suffer%20the%20l...
Good luck, and hang on in there, even when things get tough.
Well done on being sober for one week. You have to keep going. You can make it 2 weeks. Remember your daughter chose to do this because she loves you. She has set rules because she cares. The best way you can thank her is by keeping away from the drink. I bet your grandkids love having their grandad around too. Keep going you will get there.
You say you feel worthless ?? But Hang on there, you can't be because your daughter and her family think enough of you to put you up with them and put up with all the misery your drinking has probably caused them .They must be very sad an hurt that you can't see your own worth an that you don't need to drink as they Love you right.The rules are there because probably THRY FEEL THEY CAN'T TALE ANY MORE EITHER RIGHT? .YOU NEED TO ASK YOURSELF, WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT ....DYIMG ON YOUR OWN ALONE OR DYING AROUND FAMILY WHO LOVE YOU.They DO LOVE YOU AND ATE THERR 4 YOU NOW.Dont abuse it or you will make yourself homeless an wether it's an illness or not THAT'S YOUR CHOICE AND UP TO YOU AS TO WHERE YOU WANT TO BE.IM DYING OF NONE ALCOHOLIC LIVER DISEASEAND CHIRHOSIS.IM 52 AN WELL UNHAPPY PRESCRIPTION DRUGS DID THAT TO MY LIVER.I WANT TO LIVE AND HAVE A GOOD LIFE .QUESTION IS DO YOU?? ALCOHOL IS A CHOICE .MINE WASNT .WE'RE BOTH I'LL.SO DON'T PLEASE MESS IT UP AGAIN .I'M HERE FOR YOU TOO ANYTIME.ITS GREST YOU'VE DONE A WEEK SOBER.DONT BE MAKING EXCUSES ABOUT THIS AS IT'S AN UGLY PICTURE BEING A DRUNK FOR YOU AND EVERYONE INVOLVED.YOUVE STARTEDSO DO YOU THINK YOU SHOULD FINISH SOBER ?? LOTS OF LOVE AND GOOD LUCK.SPEAK ANY TIME TO ME YOU FEEL THE NEED. I WILL SUPPORT YOU AS YOU CAN SEE.BUT I WON'T MAKE EXCUSES FOR YOU OR FEEL SORRY FOR YOU IF YOUR HURTING YOURSELF AN OTHERS .ESPECIALLY FAMILY.OF COURSE THEY TRUELY MUST BE MAD AT YOU BUT YOU STILL HAVE THEM AND THEY STILL LOVE YOU.CHERISH THAT THOUGHT.FIGHT YOUR DEMONS AND COME OUT ON TOP .YOU CAN DO IT OFF YOU WANT TOO XX
Each day it gets a little easier, and one week may not seem long, but it is a marathon. Stay strong, not just for you, but your daughter and grandkids. t
They love you, and are working to get you through this, just keep thinking positive, and if the demon tries to get back, get down on the floor with the grand kids, their laughter and screams will help to scare the demons away. For your son in law, he will be trying his best, worried about his wife and kids, and also about you. Things will get better, and when they do you will look back at this time as the tome it brought you all together.
Don't let alcohol win, you family needs you, and in a few months when you are stronger you can take them out for a day to say thank you.
Remember baby steps, and realistic targets, and you will come out the other side.
Congratulations on being dry for a week I understand how you feel your daughter is trying her best to keep you well and safe please don’t feel like your useless your daughter must really love you please don’t give up on yourself do this for yourself and your family good luck to you and your daughter
Hi Jeff - it would be the easiest thing in the world to disappear down a bottle at the moment but and you know this it would push those who obviously care about you so much further away. It took me a long time to accept that I wasn't a burden - I realised how much and how proud my family were of me on a day to day basis, I heard my parents close friend saying 'you must be so proud of her' and my dad said 'unbelievably proud, its been such a difficult thing and overwhelming for her but she's done it'. Your family will also think the same of you and trust me words like that mean so much that the thought of alcohol doesn't enter my brain i've realised i'm far happier (and richer!) without it!
Obe gentlemen has conmented that you should view alcohol as a liquid you are highly allergic to or treat it as the toxic substance it is. You wouldn't drink a bottle of bleach would you? It would kill you the same way one glass of wine or a pint if beer would.
I really hope you take the advice on here - one lady who is on here lost her husband to alcohol and on one of her posts she said he'd been sober for the past 3 months and could actually see what life should be like but un fortunately for him it was too late. Please don't become another statistic. I wish you all the luck in the world - you CAN do this. Xx
I'm failing, had 2 bottles of wine, a few pints, I think my liver has taken a battering, I have a decompensated liver, I want to live but it ain't going to happen, have asked my daughter to take me hospital, am I a@e cos I keep collapsing, my brain isn't working, I'll stay in hospital this time because I need them xx
You'll stay in hospital this time 'because you need them' by that do you mean to help you with your physical state (collapsing) or mental state? If you genuinely want both which you have to want in order for this to work you need to take the help that is offered to you - make this the year that you get clean and sober.
You were given some fantastic advice from people on this site who are either suffering from liver issues or know someone who is or their loved one has passed away as a result of this.
Your liver will have taken a battering and you need to stop while you still can but you need to WANT to stop if you don't you know which path you're taking. I wish you luck.
There is a place called RAMP that helped my friend in a similar situation. Dont know if they have it near you. He lost his flat and is an alcoholic. I know in the first few days dry he used to eat chocolate to keep him off alcohol. Hope you get sorted. You deserve it xx
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