In a few days i will be turning 49 years old on the 17th of april 2018. I used to get so excited when it was my time to grow another year older and hopfully wiser? But at the very start of 2016 things changed ALOT. My breathing was very worrying, mainly at night and morning I would be sitting down alone, deep in thought and could hear the weezing inside my chest so heavy sometimes that i would think some guy was behind me i scared the life out myself and with this cough that would not go away had to go so i decided to get it checked out i had been a smoker at least for the past 20ish years but so was everyone else even more so than me.
Anyways went to doc, he sent me for a MRI and WOW they found 2x3cm tumor inside my bladder which had to be removed asap, so straight to surgery i go, they removed them sent me home the next day everything had gone perfect should be fine in about a week
got home that night and cant fined any words to describe the pain i was in and still was in for the following 20 hours
back to hospital i go to see why and they realised two holes had been perforated through the wall of my bladder. So then for the next year every 2 and half mths i had turbt after turbt to catch the cancer before it spread again which it did Until this last xmas my surgeon told me on the 22nd of nov 2017 he has it under control and for me to enjoy my holidays as he said im in remission.
So HAPPY i was Yes i have beat this thing YEAH
Then not even a mth goes by when my test results for my lungs were finally read and Im in the last stage of very severe COPD My lung function is 27% & prognosis very short
Time goes so fast especially when you dont want it to and ive got so many things to do people to see, how do i tell the kids, my mum, brothers, family and friends..........
Im finding it all so much to deal with and i would really appriciate anyones advice I feel like im just hanging on
JUST hanging in limbo
Scared
