Self Inflicted Torture.

I know, I know; here he goes again. But these things come to me and instead of having a rant I try to put them down. When I was ill I blamed everyone in sight; my job, the doctors, the world, the circumstances that I was in and so on. I was a real pain and full of anger and very bitter. I now know that it was the illness talking. After a long time and much counselling I began to realise that in the words of Shakespeare, "There is nothing good or bad but thinking makes its so". Then I realised I was doing this to myself. It wasn't the job or circumstances but my REACTION to those things. I was not 'acting' but 're-acting'. Action is positive, re-action is negative. Action accomplishes. Re-action creates fear. I re-act to something that worries me or frightens me, this creates a chain reaction which is self perpetuating. Fear-Adrenaline-Fear. You know the one. We all have demons and monsters that frighten us in the night. (And day). But it is how we treat this phenomena that decides our future understanding of ourselves. "Man, know thyself". The Oracle at Delphi said that all those years ago and it is still true. It is not so much that others have to understand us, but that we need to understand ourselves. Ah well, another piece of jonathans' blurb that can help fill the WPB. So Love to all. j.

[ellabella]

Hi Jon, thanks for blurbing . You are right of course, I used to be the same and would have blamed the air I breathed if I could have . In fact it's only lately that I am acting on things, such as relaxation exercises. I had completely blanked it for years and dismissed it as not important enough to help me.....Silly me, if I had acted on the information it could well have been a different story hmmmn x Ella x

[Maya_dawn]

Couldn't agree more Jonathan.

[Hidden]

Those are great words of wisdom and something to hold onto. My head just goes round in circles and I am angry at myself cause I know it's only me who can change me but even when I am in a happy place I never feel good enough and I just wish I could stop over thinking. I love it when I read something on here that makes so much sense. I wrote some keywords down recently of things I'd like to tackle so that I feel I am going forward and identity was one of them. I feel I don't even know what I like or don't and never have had much of an opinion on anything cause I am so indecisive. I really do appreciate everyone's posts on here. Thank you.

[Hidden]

Hi. WhyV. Many thanks. Yes, indecision and introspection are two of the worse symptoms of nervous illness and can cause a lot of distress. We compare ourselves to what we were before we were ill and that does not help. We can also accept the fact that we are never going to be the same again. That is not in a negative sense but a positive one. We will emerge better people but only if we see the point to the suffering and learn from it. (Talking about anxiety now, not more serious forms of MH of which I cannot speak). Before my GAD I was a self centred materialistic twit who wasn't particularly bothered about others. That has changed. Others do matter and we have to love and help each other or society will become a very painful place in which to live. Everyone on this site does just that. I am sure you are going forward because 'attitude' to this illness is so important. Good luck. jonathan.