Social anxiety

[Sunny0077]

How can I face my social anxiety and enjoy the life.

[kenster1]

baby steps interacting in small groups of two or three is a good start.

[Superzob]

I think kenster1 is right. There is a lot of peer pressure to conform and join in, even when you feel uncomfortable doing so; it’s probably best to involve yourself gradually. The most important thing is not to try too hard - it’s too stressful and counter-productive, and people see through it.

I have suffered from social anxiety all my life and got round it by treating everything as “business”, and that might work for you. In fact, I rarely socialised at work and, when I had been off ill for several months prior to my retirement, I didn't want to return for a retirement party as I felt uncomfortable doing so. But I was persuaded and, in the event, the room was packed! One of my colleagues flew back from a job in Russia, 3 had travelled hundreds of miles, and several whom I had not seen for years took the trouble to come; one told me he had only stayed in the job because of me, and another that I had helped him fit into his new role even though I had no idea I was doing that. If you're shy and lack confidence, you often don't appreciate that other people actually value you more than you imagine!

Everyone has something to offer in life and, as the old adage goes: "Be yourself - everyone else has already been taken!”

[Katie55]

Everyone has an element of social anxiety but some people just shrug it off while others beat themselves up worrying about what people think and how they measure up to other people worrying about their appearance clothing ability to chat to others etc etc

You can make lists in your head about all the dreadful things that might happen to the point that it’s easier to stay at home and avoid it

But there will be so many things that you will miss out on …every time you give yourself a shove out of the door you will get more confident and start enjoying being sociable…you might not be the life and soul of the party but by being there and people watching you will pick up on how other people enjoy socialising..

It’s good to remember that everyone worries about their abilities and popularity but nobody worries about other people’s !

I went to a nightclub in a pair of old wellies I did plan to change into my shoes when I got there but left them on the bus ! Nobody noticed or cared about what I was wearing I put Banana hair food on my hair this morning then got a call to go out for lunch with some friends…I must have looked a right greasy mess …Not one person noticed or commented about my hair

I have learnt over the years that nobody gives a hoot about other people because they are so busy worrying about themselves x