Feel like dying... Living in fear plsss helpp..

[Thet1028]

Hi everyone.. I started feeling this for almost 2yrs, i feel worrying of dying and fainting all the time, the worst case scenario is last year ive went to the hospital thrice a month but with normal and negative reports of full profile blood and ecg. I feel i always faint i feel i die because of heart attack i wanted to be alone and lying on bed wasting my time googling for causes and symptoms etc.. I dont like how i feel is anyone here that i can talk to coz i dont want this to tell to anyone and get started bullying me... Its very hard its like im living inside a box and i cant breath im afraid that one day i will stop by working and managing only lying and thinking and worrying it will kill me... Huhuhhhhh

[HearYou]

You appear to live in the UK. Do you have a therapist or doctor to help you? We are not professionals and are here to listen when we can, but sounds like you need a professional.

Can you contact one now?

[Thet1028 in reply to HearYou]

No... In from philippines but working here in gcc... Do u think i need a medical assestment...

[Thet1028]

its very destroying for me instead of many things to do like cleaning stuff and talking to friend but here i am alone in the room overthinking what is my illness, searching, googling sometimes i want to break my phone and wifi router i dont know what to do and i dont know where all of this come from huhuhhhhh

[n0b0dy in reply to Thet1028]

try and empty your mind, put away your electronics and be conscious of your breath etc. it's BORING especially to the excitement of believing you're about to die, but it means you'll get out of this anxious habit.

[kama24 in reply to Thet1028]

I can totally understand what you are saying. I fought panic attacks most of my life then it went to panic disorder. I did have many good years while on a medication. Two years ago it stopped working for me. Have you discussed your condition with your family doctor? Can he refer you to a physciatrist? I know what it is like to wake and feel FEAR and have it control your life. No one truly understands unless they have been there. I could name a list of procedures, medications and self help aids I have tried to no avail. One think I learned when I went to CBT classes, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, was NOT to google.....stay off the internet. They often go to the worse case scenario and that of course increases your fear. I have learned we are not alone with this affliction, although it feels very alone. People will tell you to try relaxation tapes, deep breathing, activities to take your mind off your situation.....lucky are those who get help from that! I do know that many do require medication. Finding the right medication to help your particular situation may take time. I urge you to talk to your doctor and ask to be referred to a mental health specialist. In the mean time, you are not alone. Sadly many of us deal with this.

[Thet1028 in reply to kama24]

Hi,, thankyou for ur reply i do i aporeciate it.. Honestly i followed all the advices i read anywhere go for low sodium diet, green leafy veg, good fatty foods and taking omega 3 supplement but nothing happens still panic and fear of dying attacked me everyday huhuhhh and its killing me everyday, that instead of talking to friend i stay alone and searching anything under the sun... Im afraid to take drugs and as of now my gp only told me dont get stress and dont overthink only that no referral for physch i dont know what to do.... How are you now?? Did u cope up about anxiety and panic??

[kama24 in reply to Thet1028]

I hear you, I've tried acupuncture, naturopathy, CBT classes, relaxation tapes, prescription medication, healthy diet, sunshine for serotonin, hypno therapy and much more. My first and biggest fear is of dying. I have often said not "death" because then it is all over, rather what leads up to it is what I fear...I do NOT want to fear it. I've read so many self help books, and I do go to a physciatrist every 2 months. In all honesty I find talking to a understanding kind person gives me an "outlet". Be careful though who you choose. Many think "it is all in our head"...which I guess it is. I have told my phsyciatrist that I am "logical enough to know when I'm being illogical"....and I am, but I still cannot control it. When really bad I have to resort to taking an Ativan which I do not do very often, but it does help to calm me but NOT drug me. I started very young with panic attacks. I never went on prescription meds until about my 30s. and have been on them now for 30+ yrs. I had 18 wonderful years of "being like normal" but the medication then stopped helping....then the nightmare began. Going on 2 yrs now and I battle daily. You may have to TELL your GP you want to be referred to a phyciatrist. Do you have any mental health agencies there that you can book an appointment with yourself, like we do here? Basically they just talk to you, listen, and try to offer suggestions of where to go for help.

[Thet1028 in reply to kama24]

Hi.. Hope that u cope up and very well as always, before my gp already told me to dont get stress and dont overthink only that no other prescription or referral.. Im here in gcc country im not familiar how to communicate to a physch doctor.. Takecare always wish u good living everday...

[kama24 in reply to Thet1028]

I truly hope that you find some help. Remember that a GP is NOT trained in the full area of mental health problems. Try to deal with one day at a time. I feel you are young, and have a long life ahead of you. As my specialist once said "the mind is the strongest organ in the body!: how true!

[Thet1028 in reply to kama24]

Hi kama, yeah and also they told me ur mind can play tricks on you.. Thankz for the advice i will follow that.. Lets Keep in touch here... Takecare...

[kama24 in reply to Thet1028]

Well of course your mind can control your thoughts and what you are feeling.....it doesn't take a doctor to know that!! Yes do keep in touch. I do find if I can participate in something to keep my from "thinking" it helps if just for a bit, like puzzles, knitting, on line games and having music on the radio is soothing to a point. I often think of the famous saying "you have nothing to fear but fear itself!"...how true it is. Have you tried any natural products for your situation? Nothing helped me but no 2 people are alike. Have you heard of "tapping" I have one friend who thinks it has helped her a bit. You have to do it regularly but is so simple. I guess I'm at the point in life that I'd try anything if there was a chance it would help me.

[Thet1028 in reply to kama24]

Tapping?? No im not familiar, i listen to the 'sermon on the mount' and it said if u worry u die, if u dont worry u die, so why worry.. Worries never add a single hour in ur life. its very good right i loved and listen to it most of the time... U try browse it youtube it helps me a little even not a lot atleast it help..

[kama24 in reply to Thet1028]

There is also a well known book where the author states we should "wait to worry"....why worry about something until it has actually happened....makes sense, but difficult to do for many of us. While we worry and fret we are wasting good time which we could be enjoying. How true, but how difficult for people like us! There are many different videos on You Tube about tapping....some better than others. I have a friend in England who is currently doing it daily. Here is one link if you want to look at it youtube.com/watch?v=sQ03e9D...(Not working as expected?) I do understand how you feel and wish I too could get a grip on my fear. I do not consider what I feel to be "anxiety" I call it FEAR. At times it feels like someone has taken a bucket of cold water and poured it over my head! Anxiety to me is when you worry about what I (and this is just me) consider minor things in life...like making a speech, passing a test, money issue, a minor feeling of worry. Panic and FEAR are to me far more powerful for example if you are out walking and all of a sudden a pit bull dog appears and you know it is going to attack. That is FEAR! or if you were in an air plane and you knew it was going down....that is FEAR. One thing they did suggest at CBT classes to attempt to take your mind off your situation when bad was to: name 5 things you can see right now, name 5 things you can touch, name 5 things you can hear, name 5 things you can smell etc. Lots of little "tricks", if they help great, if they don't...well we have to keep trying.

[Thet1028]

Hi goldie thankz for ur reply im 30yrs old, and currently struggling searching, googling and fighting for all this negative thoughts, as of now i dont know if the gp here will recommend me in physchiatrist as i always went to the hospital and they just told me stopped googling and u will be fine...

[Indigojoe]

Get distracted. A walk , a movie, etc.

[Thet1028]

I wasnt able to slee right now, hot flashes and fear... And guys thankyou for reply reading those message really help....

[CaptainCrunch]

It is a horrible feeling. And thoughts can flood like crazy and it feels impossible to get better, but at the for front the best thing to do is find things you really, really enjoy and try to distract your self with these topics, if you can, just to give your brain a rest. You will eventually have to learn better coping skills but this will take time so be easy on yourself. I could take months or years that get really good coping skills.

[Thet1028]

Hi captain... Thankyou for replying here, howd u do that, hope u can give me advice and cope this kind of struggle in my life... Sometimes i feel tired having this kind of life....

[CaptainCrunch]

Yes. I understand. This kind of life is hard and even to the point of debilitating at times.

Well, what worked for me might not work for you and it by no means happened quickly. But I started out making very small goals and keeping track of them. I wanted to be dead, so the fact I was still breathing was my first success. Getting dressed was another. Brushing my teeth, going to work and just keeping a job. I had to give myself the license to believe that if this is all I feel up to doing for today... then this was enough.

I started small walks. I made myself get out and just sit somewhere around people. A mall, the library, the grocery store. These to were big success and I had to tell myself, I am getting out, it is not great but I am here.

My major distractions for free time we're putting funny sitcoms on and playing a game called Creativerse, where you build things. I still put on sitcoms today and I think that just hearing the laugh track is what I like.

I also take meds. Xanax was the big helper because it does help slow down the thinking. I still take them from time to time but not as I did in the beginning. Generally now I can feel the anxiety stirring and depends on what I am doing I may or may not take one.

But today I am feeling much better. I have much more peace and joy. I am more cognitive of my body, emotions and triggers and am able to manage it better. I am still on meds and still doing therapy so I still hope to get even better.

Please keep posting.

[Thet1028]

Hi captain, wow u seems a strong person, i hope i can manage mine the way u manage yours, and i feel comfortable here knowing im not the only one feel this horrible feelings, i pray that u will continue like that and u will be perfectly fine as time goes by, yesss watching sitcom helped its distracted the way u think negative.. Keep it up...

[Madrilean77]

Hi,

I'm sorry you are going through this. I suffer from really bad health anxiety and think I will stop breathing if I don't do it consciously. Hypnotherapy has helped a lot and so has CBT. If you are UK based, you can check the NHS self-referral site for Mental Health to get online therapy. I promise it is really useful in teaching you how to change the negative thoughts.

Hope you feel better soon!

[Thet1028 in reply to Madrilean77]

Hi madrilean,, thankyou for ur reply.. Im here in gcc country, i dont think they have like that, i hope i can cope up like you.. Reading all ur replies make me feel comfortable i do really appreciate this kind of message...

[Bigphillipsuk]

Hello mate,

I get how you feel, like you are stuck in a box. I've felt like that many times. Goggle can be a nightmare though it's always the worst case scenario. I tend to just focus on the positives like the doctor has said I'm fine, to calm myself down. When it's just you it gets lonely and you're head starts to run away with itself. I tend to talk myself down and get out for a walk or something. Hope you feel better soon.

[Thet1028 in reply to Bigphillipsuk]

Hi big,, how are u? Do u still struggling on googling all symptoms that u feel.. I cant even walk coz i feelni faint, i cant even talk to people too long coz i felt my heary skipping, everyday, allday, i feel like this i feel im sick i feel i die thats why i dont have life and stuck on my room searching for everything weird... Huhuhhhh i hope i get better....

[Bigphillipsuk in reply to Thet1028]

Hi, I'm good thanks. Yeah I still Google everything to be honest. But decided it makes no difference what Google tells me. I get the same thing talking to people I start off ok then I feel the anxiety and struggle to breath. I have to calm myself down at this point. Maybe you should look into a club of some sort to get you out.

[Hidden]

I feel like that @ost of the time. I cant breath not nice is it

[Thet1028 in reply to Hidden]

Hi danny... Really u also do??? How can u deal with it? How u control and any advice from you?

[Hidden in reply to Thet1028]

Not very well at the min. The tablets I am on dont seem to be workin. If you find any that work let me know

[Thet1028 in reply to Hidden]

Im sorry,, i dont used medicine,, there are times that my anxiety kills me.. I just pray and massage my forehead with a eucalyptus oil its very calming and cooling effect and found myself sleeping and when i woke up suddenly the anxiety gone... Pls... Be strong u can make it... What are u thinking right now...

[asianspirit]

Hi Thet,

I'm Pinoy and I feel you. I have had those episodes as well. But I'm feeling a bit better now. Care to chat? Just pm me.

[Thet1028 in reply to asianspirit]

Hi asian... How u cope it up?? And is it expensive having phycho check in the philippines right? Yes, u can pm me glad to hear from you..

[asianspirit in reply to Thet1028]

I pm'd you dear. Please check.

Yes, psycho checks here in PH is approx Php5k per visit.

[Hondera_PR]

First thing I want to tell you is that you are a warrior. Having to deal with a hell of a mind and still going thru a normal life not letting any body know is almost impossible and you and all of us that rely on awesome websites like this one is just a bless to have. You are not alone. I want to tell you a list to do and make sure to talk to your Dr. Excercise, walking, reading, meditating, good food if possible(healty diet) and I read on a precious post that taking magnesium. I search about this last one and got the "aha" moment. (Read WellnessMama) We might be low in magnesium and all of this crappy feelings are beating us because of that. I am waiting on an order of Magnesium Oil and I'm gonna start soon. I hope this help you in some way. I am very positive. 🙏🏽

[Thet1028 in reply to Hondera_PR]

Hi hondera.. Wo. I really idolized people whos thought is very positive hope u will stay that way... By the way are u struggling on anxiety right now, how u cope with it, i will try magnisium also thankz for this advice, reading ur message makes me comfortable hope i will continously fine and positive in life...

[Hondera_PR in reply to Thet1028]

I do suffer with anxiety and just 6 months ago it has gotten horrible worst. I have 3 kids and a husband and I don't talk this to no body. I have been in the shadows with this until I found this site like a week ago. I am so relief because I understood that I am not alone. I have learn the hard way that we are creators. All of us are creators and what we think of is what we become. That's why I try my best to cancel all bad feelings, all bad emotions of sickness and ask the universe(God) to take away all this harsh energy and transmute it into loving energy that heals my heart and mind because I don't want it to come true. This I do on a daily basis. That's praying and trying on the busy schedule to meditate. Just quiet my mind of all harsh thinking. At night I look on Youtube Healing meditation Music and I sleep with that. Last week I found this web site and I read a lady saying about magnesium and I search about it. I think it have a lot of sense our bodies need nutrients and minerals and we not having a good diet our bodies run low on those. That why they say we are what we eat.

I Listen to Doreen Virtue and turn off the tv! I try to start reading about Reiki, Taoism, Tai Chi and all this ancient way of living withing the grace of the universe. We are all so attached to this daily living that we forget that we are energy and energy never get destroy it just change matter. This energy is the energy of the universe is the Great Spirit, God, The Isness. This I try to remind my self on a daily basis

Most of this anxiety is of the unknown. We fear the unknown. But I'm in the process of knowing and this is the journey of all of us. So I pray for all of us to get better and free our minds.

[Thet1028 in reply to Hondera_PR]

U are happily married women u need to be strong as what ur doing right now.. Having god beside you while battling in this kind of fear is a very big help, they say no god know fear, know god no fear, but sometimes in my case my fear and worries take 1st place, so i always pray wherever i am, when i feel that panicking will start for me i pray, u are right having many activities u will get distracted to think of feae because u are busy... Hondera i hope u will feel normal and strong always trust to god and think of ur family....

[Hidden]

Welcome Thet2038 ... lots of support and compassion on here 💕 ... I'm fear death too !

[Thet1028 in reply to Hidden]

Hey heidi.Really,, what did u feel when ur afraid and how u cope up???

[Hidden in reply to Thet1028]

... I always was frightened off death. I was a child when I woke up one night and hid ! In the wardrobe lol ... dad come and I wouldn't tell him I had woke up frightened of mum and him Dying ! I just said I had a dream .... from then on I feared every Birthday ... I asked someone also as a child what it was like in heaven, they told me it was full of sweets lol .... I was very very young but I remember, I wonder if I'd heard a conversation or something to raise my fears of death at a very young age.

I'm not so frightened now since I lost my mum. Remember when you pass, you don't know it ... only the people you leave behind that love you suffer ! However hard and challenging life is it's still a gift yeh know ! Natures beautiful .... as Iv got older I'm starting to realise this ... so I tent not to plan way ahead in front ! I try and live in the moment .... one day at a time, no pressure ... enjoy that particular day. Please buy a book/journal and write in it everyday how you feel, what you have seen, what you have heard , experienced, happy, sad, frustrations, fear, quietness ( don't be scared of quietness and peace), don't feel you have to be part of the fast track rat race to succeed ! Just find your inner peace. Oh and don't watch the sky news. Lol good luck 🍀

[Thet1028 in reply to Hidden]

Heidi.. Thankyou so much... I really appreciate ur reply,, i learned a lot and i will try my best to apply that in my everyday life... Ive heard this line in one of the pastor in sermon on the mount it goes like this ' if u worry u die, if u dont worry u die so why worry' this phrase really helps me a lot everyday i listened to this 100 times or more try in google and listen to it...

[Hidden in reply to Thet1028]

Hi Thet1028 .., I will have a listen to that ... what a great quote .... it is possible to reduce worry ! ... prioritising worries I'm practicing at the moment ... then hopefully I will reduce eventually to not getting into the habit of worrying all the time ... which instills anxiety ... good luck always here for you to chat with and support. 🍀 x

[Thet1028 in reply to Hidden]

Yes.. Try to listen to that, and if i have little help i can share i will post here.. Hope for ur well living everyday, im always here one chat away... Takecare always... If were living in one place i probably invite u to grab a coffee with me lol... Enjoy being positive...

[Hidden in reply to Thet1028]

Haha yes ... absolutely love my Starbucks lol .. thank you .. you take care too ! Only a message away c

[Tttt66]

Wow I totally feel you I get really bad!! rrealllllyyyy baddddd left arm pain and instantly think I have heart problems!!!!!! Omg so scary

[Thet1028 in reply to Tttt66]

And sometimes u feel fainting and dizziness and all u have to do is laying down alone in the bed.... Right??? Huhuhhhh i feel u also...

[Tttt66 in reply to Thet1028]

Yess!! But the worse but has to be the heart. Especially when it beats fast suddenly even when I'm calm I get so scared and bam back to panic mode

[Thet1028 in reply to Tttt66]

Im like that before but i coped up my palpitation with proper diet.. 1st go to ur go and have some test if it comes normal start giving your heart a healthy food like what im giving now olive oil, avocado, almonds omega 3 like that...