A dark place : So it's 10 at night, and I... - Anxiety Support

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A dark place


So it's 10 at night, and I just had an anxiety attack. I think the hardest thing in the midst of anxiety is that it makes me feel alone, like for the 15 minutes I spent pacing in the living room with failed attempts at breathing, there comes a few moments where I forget the real reason I even had the attack and I feel like everyone is so out of reach and everything is out of touch, I feel like there's so much space between me and the rest of the world yet at the same time I feel suffocated and choked. I get dizzy and pass out for a second. When I'm not having an anxiety attack, I feel out of touch with my emotions, I feel angry often, I wake up with anxiety, and I go to bed with anxiety. It barely ever stops. I am hurting my family because of it and it's getting harder and harder to manage. I don't know what to do or who to trust.

5 Replies


I am sorry no one was about to reply when you were having your anxiety attack and I hope you are feeling a little better now :-)

I understand the breathing thing when you are having a panic attack , the techniques seem to go straight threw the window and sometimes I think when we are in the mist of an attack trying to do the breathing can make us more anxious because we just can't so it and it is like our heads will scream " Come on we need to do the breathing " and the more we try the more we can't do it so this can even make us panic more !

I think it is a good idea to practice the breathing when we are calmer and not actually having an attack so we can get more used to them , sense more how it feels when calm to regulate our breathing and then when we are having an attack it can become easier to put it into practice

The old fashioned way is to breath in and out in a paper bag and this takes no concentration or effort and can actually work

Always remember if you can that when you are having a panic attack imagine I steep hill and when that panic reaches the top of that hill the only place it has to go is back down again , so as bad as it feels that is what happens when you are having a panic attack , it reaches it's peak which feels dreadful but once it does it has to come back down

I can understand you feel your family maybe fed up , but it more will be a case of they feel frustrated because they do not know how to help you as anxiety is something we cannot see only feel and unless you have suffered with it you do not know how it feels so it can be hard for loved one's and frustrating but maybe if you explain that you understand they may not understand and you accept that but if they could just be there for you how much this would help you

I would go to your Doctors and ask for some support you need it and if you have been already then go back again , explain what you have said in your post , they have heard it all before and I am sure between you that you will find what will be best to help

You can trust people on here anxiety again makes us feel we cannot trust anyone but here you are among people that have or do feel just like you are so it is somewhere you can come & open up and we may not always have all the answers but we are very good at listening and we do know how this feels

Take Care x

Agora1 in reply to Hidden

Hi Bounce, I totally agree with trying breathing slowly in the paper bag. It does work, I have used it myself. Actually carry one in my glove compartment just in case. What stood out the most is what you said about

when having a panic attack, it reaches it's peak but once it does it has to come back down. I've never heard anyone explain it that way. Something for all of us to remember.

Hidden in reply to Agora1

Hello :-)

Yes I had it explained that way to me by a psychologist once and when she was explaining it , it made so much sense when I sat and thought about it and it is a good thing if you can remember because as we know panic attacks are awful and when you are in the depth of one you panic more thinking it is never going to end but if you can hang on to the thought that when it reaches it's peak it is going to have to come down again I have found it does help :-)

The old fashioned methods can sometimes be the best and I also think the paper bag trick can be the easiest technique that does not need any thought or effort ....thing is paper bags can be hard to get hood of now a days but when I do get one I always save it :-)

Hope you are keeping well :-) x

Agora1 in reply to Hidden

Hi, I use the large brown lunch bags. Perfect size.

Take care

Hi dear, I understand how anxiety barely ever stops. It's like a constant companion just waiting to spike if something unexpected happens besides. I definitely endorse "pacing" when you are in the midst of an attack as well as having trouble taking that breath. It will help release the tightness in the diaphragm which is causing you to not be able to inhale completely. You are not alone, we all support you.

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