Feeling of "release" prior to almost fainting - what is this? Now I'm afraid to perform anymore.

[Mariesoprano]

I've been singing in choirs since I was a kid (40 years +) and a few years ago, I almost fainted during a performance. It's happened 3 times in 3 years and now I'm afraid of performing anymore. Understanding that it's coming from anxiety has helped and I forced myself to make it through my last performance by constantly moving while singing but I almost lost it at the end of the concert. As the panic starts to build - knowing that I'm stuck in place - and the heart starts to beat faster, I experienced what I can only explain as a sudden feeling of my body "releasing" or "sinking" from my head down to my toes. The last time this happened I continued to force myself to stay on stage and although I made it, it scared the heck out of me. The first 2 times I experienced this, I left the stage immediately after the song in occured in.

I have a really hard time understanding this anxiety as I've been doing this all of my life and I really enjoy performing. My fear now simply comes from the fear of these past experiences. Having a stool or a railing next to me for support helps a lot but that's not always possible.

What is this "releasing" feeling and has anyone else experienced these performance issues?

Thanks

[Hidden]

The first, I think, and most important thing, to do is to not believe that you "almost fainted". You either do, or you do not faint. It's like when people believe they were "almost killed" when they haven't even got a bruise.

The belief that you "almost" faint / collapse / die / etc can fuel a system of behaviour that can effectively hide the true nature of an episode. The fear is starting to fear the fear!

Could it just be nerves of the performance? Maybe, maybe not.

Having said that suffering this three times in three years really is not anything particularly sinister, in itself, to be worried about.

It sounds a little bit like an anxiety driven issue that might be affecting your blood pressure with the sinking feeling as the blood pressure suddenly drops when your body takes over from your mind and the normal pressure is established.

Go and see your doctor and get it checked. Might be something worthy of checking, might not be.

[Sandy47 in reply to Hidden]

I also sing in public and I think you're like me and suffer from a rush of adrenaline! I now take a beta blocker before a performance and find that it works for me.