For those who feel like I want to be old myself!!

Hi Everyone,

This post I am writing about my experience of trying to be myself!!

We all have one feeling in common and that is we all miss our oldself!!

We all always think that I miss old myself and I want to be old me,

but let me tell you one thing clearly that you cannot be old yourself again because life and time they are like flowing river and they dont go back they always march forward!!

Even when i was in my initial four years I always imagine about being me but that is not the solution.

Please make sure you read this line again that is not the solution again, I am no doctor but that is not the solution that will give you peace and that is not the solution you are searching for!!

This problem makes you feel like your old self is there but you cant just access it,

It is like your old self is covered with layer of dust,

When you always think about be1ing old your self every time you think that before this problem i used to behave this way and I am not behaving that way, I should try to behave like old me but just give it some space to your new me and let the new life accept you and also accept the new you!!

By trying to be old you , you are still in past and that is what you should avoid!!

By doing this you are at peace with new you and in other scenario when you crave to be old self you feel somewhat hatred for present yourself, though you do not know this but you are doing this unknowingly!!

By accepting your new you , who is deep in anxiety and feels like worthless you will be feeling better and when you stop hating your current situation you will feel relaxed because you will be in fully present though that present will be painful but that pain will slowly decrease!!

By being in present you will be in acceptance and that is the first step to recovery!!

When you will be out of this problem you will be getting better than old you!!

This you will understand when you will be your way on recovery, though I am not on my clear way of recovery,But this problem changed my personality totally!!

I am more social now and more compassionate!!!

And so many changes in my life It is like I understand life better than before.

Before this problem I used to be geek and book worm and books were my only friends but because of this problem I am not able to read properly so I had to get out of my room and I had to meet so many people!!

I learnt my way around people , initially it was difficult but now it feels good!!

in my 12th before this problem I used to know only some limited guys only and I was so shy with girls also!!

But this all changed slowly when I tried to get mixed with people,

With this problem it was difficult but slowly I managed and now I am very good with girls , I have so many friends who are girls though I do not have girlfriend and I dont want one until I think I am feeling better,

but still I am trying to make my way with my good old friends books and as I wanted to go to IIT before this problem , I still have that goal and for that i am trying to read slowly!!

Hope this will give you glimpse of your future when you will be out of this hell!!

As always you come out of problem more powerful, patient and wise!!

Same will happen with this!!

Whatever I am writing is really hard to digest but it is really helpful!!

8 Replies

oldestnewest
  • Hello

    I hope you reach your goal I am sure you will reading your post :-) x

  • I did not get you!!!

    Do you want to say I m not going anywhere with this post??

  • No I said I hope you reach where you want to get and from your post you sound like you will ....do you get this ? x

  • In other words: as Ram Das said and his words became famous: Be Here NOW. :) I can totally relate to what you are saying, and yes, I, for one, am guilty of often thinking

    "I wish I could be my old self."

    I appreciate your words, and please know they fell on receptive ears!

    I get really irritated when some of my friends (we are mostly seniors) keep talking about the Good Ol'Days as if NOTHING had ever been wrong and I keep telling them ITS NOW.... but yet, mentally, I have been doing pretty much the same thing when it comes to be Pre-Anxiety, ibs Days...

    SO THANK YOU, cpmydream! Have a good day! Today. Yesterday has flown the coop. :)

  • When I think about the old me, it makes me anxious. I am not who I use to be and in the best ways. I have grown up. I just wish to feel good, have good health, I want to feel some kind of normal.

  • My old self is who I am now, I've had this problem all my life, That's why I'm an agoraphobic, its very hard for me to leave my home its my safe place, mainly because when I get nervous or have the panic attacks, I have probably all the things being mentioned, but They also effect my stomach, go straight to my stomach, I feel it tightening up then I get really panicky and have to run to the bathroom. so its even harder to work with, get my mind off of it, do something I enjoy, cause I can't go anywhere MOST of the time. I NEVER go to movies, out to eat, partys, sometimes I have a hard time making it to the grocery store :( I have panic attacks at home all the time, but leaving home I no will absolutely bring on an attack :( So I take extra meds when I have to go some where and hope that will do it. I love my home its old and country, seven acres, a lot of work, and needs repairs, my husband put in ponds so he could bring the deer and swans and all the critters and country beauty to ME, and we shared it together. But now he's in Heaven so its very hard to grow old alone and face all the problems. Theres good days and bad. Just like there is for all of us. And I have My son and two Beautiful grandkids to enjoy, I'll survive. We all will Won't we ? :) It sure is hard at times though :( When you get really panicky and scared to death, remember I'm here, I have done this all my life, and if you need some one to talk to, compare notes with, I will be glad to help and I'm sure in the process it would also help me :)

  • thanks for your reply!! judy!!

  • Judy you are your old self and that is good news but can you share us that what you felt when you felt that you are not yourself anymore and cant do anything you used to do when you were normal?

You may also like...