New to the site

[Need2relax]

I found this site yesterday, have added a few replies to posts.

Everyone seems nice and welcoming, thanks for that.

So here is my story ..... At 17 my parents went thru a nasty divorce I was diagnosed with a nervous stomach. I fainted or felt faint, no appetite list like 25 pounds, no drive, no ambition, did not want to leave the house. After about a year and a half I seem to be ok. Flash forward 30 years my mother sick and passes and I fall apart. Feel dizzy, panic attacks and off balance, no appetite, lost like 25 pounds, major tension in neck and shoulders, feel like throat closing, shaking all over, can't catch my breath.......go to doctors get melds, see a councillor, reach out to friends and family for support. Then my father passes 8 months ago. I have refused the meds (hate taking pills). Have not had a panic attack in over a year......still suffer from dizzy spells and nervous stomach, aches and pains, shaking all over and major tension in my neck and shoulders.

I hate living like this....I have good days and get so upset when I have a bad day because I remember the good day and don't know what's different.....so I'm still very much a work in progress. But I'm well on my way!

Tomorrow go for blood work - afraid of doctors - so that is a very big step!

So tonight will be a long night but once the waiting is over I will be one step closer to being myself again. Fingers crossed!

Glad I found this site hope to learn some things, share information, offer support and be supported.

Thanks

[Hidden]

Hi need x welcome to the site x not many around at this hour granted but I'm sure more will say hi at some point x wow u certainly have been through the mill x sometimes I think when we lose those we love it's like we lose the safety net and it's hard to find our feet again x but it will get better and things will become more easily managed x the fact u have not had a p attack in over a year is brilliant x well done. I don't take the pills either not a fan, but sometimes we have to as it's what gives that last bit of edge to the battle we face x try to not get so upset at the bad days, we won't get to where we need to be if we only travel on the sunny days x take the bad and make them good x good luck with your bloods x keep chatting xx donver x

[hamble99b]

hi need 2, sorry to hear you're not so good.

my gp said "If I told you your body wasn't making enough of something and you were diabetic, would you take insulin?"

when I said yes, he continued

"well, you're not diabetic, but your body is not making enough of something, will you take the supplement?"

I nodded.

"you are depressed. if we can get the med's right, this will improve."

put like that it made great sense to me.

that and the cbt do help.

please reconsider anti-depressants, they might help you too.

have you had grief counselling?

regards,

hamble.

[Unsure2]

Hi, welcome to the site.

It's really good here everyone's really nice and supportive so you've got a good network of people when you need it.

I just wanted to say i am so very sorry for your loss, truly.

Everyone has there own recovery and grief period and it comes in different ones you have to complete your own path to fully heal. I always think having anxiety has to make it that little bit worse (typical) as it touches us on a different level and affects how we feel and heightens all our anxiety levels.

Maybe if the steps you took, doctors, counselling, meds worked for you before try doing it again, but maybe even if you're feeling better initially keep going with the counselling and seeking support until you feel you are completely exhaustive of all knowledge of panic attacks and how to overcome them. I know people (including myself in the past) have the tendency to stop counselling, reading all material, seeking support from others when you're feeling better and not having the symptoms of an attack or feeling anxious. And then when you start to feel it all coming back on again sort of have to start from the beginning again. Persevering with it is best.

I hope your bloods go ok. Xx

[Hidden]

Hi and welcome.Like you I don't take pills for anxiety try to get through by other means,just started counselling.Its great you've not had a panic attack in so long,especially after losing your dad.Keep thinking about the good days,knowing the bad passes eventually.Goo luck at the docs xxxx

[Evey37]

Hi need yes all pretty much friendly here ...good on you for handling your anxiety through tough times...good luck with the blood tests and hopefully you will be back to normal soon

[Need2relax]

Thanks everyone.

So back from docs.....I was trying to give urine sample and there I am locked up in this tiny bathroom and I'm getting hotter by the second sat for what felt like forever (probably) 10 mins......I'm like I have to get out of here. So told nurse I would do it at home. Sitting here with cup of tea, trying to calm down. It's the results that I'm stressing about. Since my mom has passed and the panick has come back I seem to have developed so many fears and phobias.......like I have to have a window open at all times need air. Afraid of heights and closed in tight small spaces, big stores and big crowds of people seem to really bother me at times. Driving the car sometimes. Seem very unsteady at times like my balance is off - that happens if I'm out somewhere with people. Thinking everyone is looking at me think they can see what's happening to me. I think everyone is mad or upset with me.

I'm so glad I found this site......it really does help to know people care and understand!

Trying to get myself together I have to go to work.

[Need2relax]

So I have gone back to doctors and blood pressure is thru the roof. So I have meds now to take. I'm freeking out about taking them and about any possible side effects there could be. I really fear taking meds for some reason? My blood work results not in yet so the nurse says to me that is odd, I will call and see what's happening with them. Then says we will call if there is anything abnormal. So I have been in a panic about that all day. I feel like crap. Everyone is saying oh you need to relax! No crap! If only it were that easy!! My husband and I bought a trailer last summer, looking so forward to the start which is this weekend. Now I feel sick and dizzy, stomach tossing.....Don't want to go and be trapped in the rain at the trailer if I'm panicking.