Missed psychotherapy this morning... :/

Nobody woke me up and my appointment was at 11am! I told my mum as soon as the appointment came through, but she didn't bother to arrange transport or even say a word about it. She claimed she 'forgot'! I hate being late to appointments, even worse missing them, I doubt they will add me to the list if I keep missing the appointments. If I don't get on the list then i'll have nothing when I come out of CAMHS! If it was my younger sister who had the appointment mum would go to the end of the earth to get her there, but as I don't complain, I always come second. I feel really confused, brain dead and anxious for no reason! Seems to be a regular occurrence now, I'm clearly going to need medication, this is not going to go away on its own, I'm cracking up.:(

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3 Replies

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  • First of all: YOU'RE BACK! :D I am sure the others will be really happy to see. :)

    Now for the main bit- this, is...awful. I'm sorry your mum didn't listen to you or help you, I'm wondering if maybe she is struggling herself because I remember you saying before she did have depression. Please don't take it personally. She probably finds it difficult empathesis with anyone else's situation or to see past the moment, she should seek help herself so that she feels she can cope and is strong enough to help you and your sister. It's awful though, that you feel so unsupported when this what you need at the moment. You are not and cannot be responsible for her, is there anyone else in the family you can contact to explain that you're worried - outside the current house hold? Just be honest, you can't be blamed for being honest.

    Now I know it's a difficult thing to do, but to make the best of the situation, have you tried ringing the people up and explaining to them what happened? I'm sure they'll understand completely, and they won't give in on you especially as they know you're having a really difficult time, and then perhaps as you're there you can tell them you really feel you need medication, especially as you felt you made minimal progress during your treatment sessions at CAHMS. I know you get anxious talking to people on the phone, so if you're not able maybe you email them?

    I was having a browse on NHS choices about depression (I did so because I was worried about myself), I read there that, in it's most severe cases, depression can and is known to, have symptoms of psychosis - which could explain some of the unpleasent experiences you were having a few months back - reading further the symptoms match the ones you describe almost completely, which is interesring. But it means, as you say, and as we have known for ages, you definitely needed medication, and you probably still do. Please let someone know if you can love, because, and even though they should have done anyway, they might take you more seriously.

    When I was browsing, I found this really cool site where you can express your feelings without the need for writing. Just let me find it. bigwhitewall.com/my-account...

    Basically, you use graphic art, pics etc. rather than text, to express your emotions. You remember the bebo? With the bricks you could draw on? I think it's something like that. :) It's up to you but it might be worth a look. At first I thought it was part of NHS choices but it's an indepedent site and you have to sign up. Still looks great though, and it was plugged into NHS.

    Sorry for the length of the reply. If you can, drop us an email to let us know how you're doing, slowly dealing with the stress better.

    Biiig (((((HUGS!))))) xxxx

    Fay :)

  • Dammit! It costs money to join! >:|

    Never mind, was worth a try. Sorry MC. Oh I wish there was something I could do to help. xx

  • Or maybe it doesn't it depends on your area I think. :)

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