Therapy Part Deux

[DorkiousPrime]

I signed up for therapy, first session is December. That is fine, I sort of still feel like maybe I'm a fraud at times.I'm trying some app which was suggested by NHS Talking Therapy, not really into it atm. WYSA Health?

I find that sudden 'waves' can come over me without warning or clear reason. Just a sudden morose feeling or dark pressure. It isn't fun and I try to not let on to family in the presence but it's very discombobulating.

How I feel, if I feel, doesn't always seem to align at all with how the moment should be feeling. The fatigue by afternoon is back and so is poor sleep.

I can not work out what's mental health, what possibly be neurodivergency but I feel like shutting up shop or escaping a lot.

Is this all par for the course?

[Aimingfor106]

Hi! I see no one has responded yet, let me see if I can help. But why do you feel like a fraud? By going to therapy??

Those WAVES...I totally know what you're talking about and I've been getting them daily. They're uncomfortable, unexpected, and unwelcome! But I breathe through them and remember that it IS a wave and it'll pass. My emotions often don't align with my environment. Everything can be perfect and calm and peachy, and all of a sudden I feel darkness and dread, and I don't want to do anything. Depression hits in the weirdest ways. It can sometimes be in waves, or it can come as a swell and hang out a long while...

Wanting to shut up shop or escape a lot sounds like you've been through some childhood trauma(s)...? If I'm right, it might be worth digging into those. Getting to the root of depression is the only way out of it. In the mean time, I lean on medication as a tool while I do my healing.