Is it noticable?

[EricJones]

How do I try and blend in when I'm hyper focused on people and hyper vigilant...are all these things really in my head and aren't noticeable to others?

[cashew78]

You're describing a Catch 22;People won't notice unless you're super fixated on them, then *maybe* they may notice. You're most likely unnoticeable, but if you super fixate on people constantly and try to blend in constantly then the stress of that *may* be noticable.

It looks like a vicious cycle.

I don't know the particulars of your situation personally, so I can't (nobody can) give you the definitive answers you seek. The only reasonable thing that occurs to me is that, in this situation, one would need to not care so intensely about what would be considered a 'normal' type of baseline and just try to sit in stillness without thinking about it. It's not about never blending in, but more about not letting it get to you so intensely. Best of luck.

[April2024 in reply to cashew78]

Great advice, but hard to do. Trying to fit in when you feel like you stick out so much is so hard. I try not to stare but then I look around too much. It's like I don't know how to look. I feel your struggle

[PersephoneGreen]

I have similar thoughts from time to time, often wondering are people really this unaware. So then I tell myself if they are this oblivious then they probably aren’t noticing the things I am worried about. Do you pick up on cues that they are aware of your hypervigilance? More information would be helpful.

[Downinil]

Hi Eric, I think Cashew78 said it best. I agree with them. You are the only one who cares if anyone notices.

[The_Butterfly]

why are you hyper vigilant? I have been hypervigilent my whole life. Very sensitive to signs of rejection. Over the last few days, I’ve been thinking, people are dumb as hell and maybe friends are overrated. Yeah. That’s right. Maybe the problem is that the people you are talking to are boring as hell. Maybe we as humans are evolving past the beer commercial idea of friendships and get-together. Are you functioning? Is it sustainable? If so, maybe think about getting ok with a life of solitude and a life of keeping interactions with others to a minimum. Back in the day, we called them monks and hermits and it was fine because they had a respectable title. Nowadays, we have no respectable titles for solitary people. Well, maybe we should come up with a name.

[Agora1]

Hi Eric, if I've noticed anything, I have noticed you haven't been on for

a week. Everything okay?? xx

[EricJones in reply to Agora1]

yeah i just been cutting down on the amount of hours i've been on here for, because it takes up a lot of my day to be responding to many people

[Agora1 in reply to EricJones]

Got you. I totally understand. xx