Anxiety help

[Debbs73]

For the last few year's I've suffered with anxiety issues. It's stupid things that triggers my anxiety now, that is stupid It's madness as it happens now when I'm going place and seeing people I've been going to for year's. They include me going to see my hairdresser, my tattooist . I've no reason to be anxious about going to see these people as I class them more as friends. Does anybody else suffer badly with this anxiety?

[Nafpaktos]

Yes. This is normal anxiety, and it could be caused by any number of things (e.g., agoraphobia, stress.)

[Debbs73 in reply to Nafpaktos]

I am struggling with a fair bit of stress at the moment. Just before Xmas I was told that I have a few clots on my right lung. Which I think has added to my anxiety ten fold. However this has just fueled my anxiety.

[Nafpaktos in reply to Debbs73]

I'm sorry to hear that, and it makes sense that you'd feel so stressed. Two questions for you. First, do you have support for the medical issue? And second, can you think of a connection between that stress of the diagnosis and the anxiety around seeing your friends?

[Debbs73 in reply to Nafpaktos]

Hi there. Firstly thank you for taking the time to reply to me. Yes I do have medical support. The hospital that originally found the blood clots were spot on. I was admitted straight away had all sorts of tests done and started on my medication straight away. I've since been bk to see my consultant after I had an ultrasound done that showed up that my body isn't breaking them down. My lack of my lung workage is causing the right side of my heart to work faster which they say is not good. They've now transferred me to a different hospital which deal with my condition. That appointment is next week. All in scared of is dying which is constantly playing on my mind, I'm really scared.

In regards to your second question I really don't know, I really can't understand why my mind is doing this. It's not so much the stress anxiety of seeing my friend, it's other people and places, like going to the hairdressers, getting my nails done, going shopping. All of which I've been going to for years, that's why I don't understand my anxiety of going to these places

[Agora1]

I'm so sorry Debbs73 that this has been happening to you. It is however a part

of anticipation anxiety which has nothing to do with the people you will see.

It has to do with Anxiety having control over you by lying that you are incapable

in going to these places. As long as you feel the fear, your mind will accept that there

is danger of some sort.

You see, our thoughts both good and bad are controlled by us believing in them.

Right now your subconscious mind is telling you it's not safe to go out to these

familiar places. Which is ridiculous since you have been going there for years.

But...as long as you believe these lies (good or bad) you will be scared to make a

move. Remember our thoughts are nothing but that...thoughts. It's not a reality.

Practice over throwing those negativities coming from those thoughts. Your life,

your choices under your control. You've got this Debbs. xx

[Craigliving4Jane in reply to Agora1]

Any special ways to accomplish the over throwing.

A thing besides the standard techniques??

[Agora1 in reply to Craigliving4Jane]

Hi Craig, whatever works for you is the special way.

For myself, Meditation of all sorts is my key to success.

Affirmations are powerful in allowing our mind to take back control.

Sometimes it's about imagery taking us down a peaceful calm path.

And always, it's about Breathing that allows my body and mind to go

forward without a doubt, without a fear, because I control my life. xx

P.S. You know Craig, I have a bagful of methods and tools that I can choose

from when needed. YouTube has always been my go to in learning.

[Craigliving4Jane in reply to Agora1]

Excellent stuff again. When finally properly diagnosed ,I and my family were told that my brain works 100 miles faster than theirs.

It’s been both a blessing and a curse. I’ve used it for good. , but It overpowered me a lot when so very sick . Meditation was difficult to remain in and I practiced a few.

Now that I’m feeling good again it’s much easier to , let’s say “control”

Enjoy the day

Much love

[Agora1 in reply to Craigliving4Jane]

What you say is very true Craig. I may be writing a Post regarding Breathing

and Meditation soon. I will give you a head's up and that is learning and practicing

is a must when feeling better. We can't wait until doom and gloom is around us.

It just doesn't work w/o practice during the good times. (did I say good times?) lol

You know what I mean. Make it a great day my friend. Life is really good xx

[Craigliving4Jane in reply to Agora1]

THAT IT IS- good or bad days

[Debbs73 in reply to Agora1]

Hi. Agora1. Thank you for replying to my message. Sorry for the delay in getting back to you but been ill over the weekend with pains in my right side and painful to breathe. I've never heard of anticipation anxiety. Ìm unsure of what you actually mean. Do you mean it should be mind over matter? The don't understand why my mind is doing this as I've been going to these places for years, with some of these places and more the people have become friends. This is what I don't get.. could you explain that last bit to me as I don't quite understand what you mean. 🙂

[Agora1 in reply to Debbs73]

Hi Debbs73, I would be more than happy in trying to explain what Anticipatory Anxiety

is. It's a fear of something that doesn't exist yet, that hasn't happened. It falls in the

same category as the "What if's". What if this happens (purely a projection of our

mind into the future, which isn't possible>

Just as the past can't be brought back, the future is yet to happen. We need to stay

in the moment, the present time which is our reality. The minute our mind walks

out of that moment, it tends to go in all different directions with absurd and

possibilities that are not real.

Maybe not real but Anticipation has the power to project the same symptoms

as it really happening.

Most of the time our anticipation of something is no where near what it may

really be like. And with that said, we wear ourselves out and put ourselves into

a non real state of fear.

I hope this better explains what you are feeling most of the time.... xx

[Kinlay]

Since Covid, YES, simply getting ready to leave, leaving, seeing people, etc. all can trigger my anxiety. And it is all textbook for true anxiety disorders (I have GAD with a dash of OCD). First of all, cut yourself some slack. Secondly, talk to someone. It can be a professional (I'm not sure if you are diagnosed or being treated), or it can be family or a friend. Sharing this with someone you know can be SO helpful! I finally started telling people to explain my many cancellations and the need to leave early, and they were so supportive - which made it all easier. And finally, I am working through it by making myself make and keep plans. Starting small at first: meet for a wine tasting, then go home; make an appointment, go to my appointment, and then go home; make a grocery list, go to ONE store, and then go home. I have worked up to longer times out and with people, but once my anxiety kicks in after a while, I smile, make a polite excuse, and leave. Knowing I can leave early and letting some of my close friends and family know what is going on has really taken a lot of the pressure off me, so I am getting out more and more. Good luck - and hang in there! You are not alone.