I'm getting a bit worn down from anti anxiety medication withdrawal and general anxiety disorder and depression.
I've been withdrawing from a benzodiazapine ( clonazepam) for 4 months now, veeeeery slowly as I was on it for 25 years. My 4 year depression was finally improving but I can tell it's back.
No energy, no interest in things I enjoy and just want to watch tv and zone out. I likely have at least 2-3 more months withdrawal if I want to minimize any chance of post withdrawal syndrome.
I'm generally one who tries to keep up a gratitude list and make myself be social sometimes. I'm not typically a loner. Not lately. I can't force myself to even go for brunch with a friend, something I love doing.
Here is my MAIN PROBLEM: GUILT! Just with everything. My dog looks sad and I feel guilt. I cancel anything social then feel guilt, and really beat myself up.
I make a short list of simple household chores and don't do them until it's way beyond time to.
I can't decide if it's extreme laziness, procrastination or symptoms of withdrawal combined with a lot of major changes over the last 2 years.
I'm not typically a lazy person though I've never been a clean freak. Also, though I was only ever moderately social, now when I have to go out anywhere except to get my grandsons from school I'm filled with anxiety.
That's my main reason for me to get dressed as well as feeding my pets and making sure my dog is walked, not always by me, but walked.
I'm wondering if I should stay where I am for a month or so with my med withdrawal.
Why is it rhat some of us neglect ourselves at the very time we need self care?!
Well, my clothes are usually clean and I have food in the cupboards and I shower when I have the energy.
Any suggestions, encouragement or anything? Thanks friends.