Suffering from anxiety and depression

[CharlieChew]

I'm new to this site. I have been dealing with depression and anxiety for most of my life. I'm in treatment but it's not working. I'm in a severe relapse right now. I'm about to be fired from my job and I'm afraid I'm going to lose my apartment. I'm just so overwhelmed and feel so alone.

[MariaLove123]

CharlieChew thanks for sharing. Welcome! This site is really great. A lot of support and advice. I’m sorry about your depression and anxiety. I understand completely. Being overwhelmed too is not good. Maybe you can talk to your boss and be open about what’s going on. You should look for other jobs but don’t go crazy. Apply to a few a day. And share as much as you want with us. Hugs 🤗

[CharlieChew in reply to MariaLove123]

I tried to reply to your post but it was flagged for being inappropriate. I'm not sure what I wrote that was inappropriate. But thanks for your kind words.

[MariaLove123 in reply to CharlieChew]

That is so strange. You can message me what you said. That might work.

[CharlieChew in reply to MariaLove123]

I think I used a word they thought was inappropriate but really isn't. Anyways, I work for a big company and have been there for less than a year. So I'm not protected under FMLA. I'm on a unpaid medical leave. My therapist isn't being very supportive I'm trying to find a new one. She completed the ppwk for two weeks but I wasn't ready to go back. She will not complete the ppwk for the extension. Because she thinks I just need to go back to work or just give up. So if she doesn't approve the extension I'm going to be fired. And she says she won't. So I'm going to start looking for a new job because I can't lose my apartment. It's all I have besides my cat. If it wasn't for my cat, I wouldn't have made it this far.

[MariaLove123 in reply to CharlieChew]

Hey there! Sorry for the late response. I had my TMS Treatment today. Maybe you should see a new doctor? Is the one you’re seeing a psychiatrist? They have more power to get you paid leave. Even if you take a breather for a week and dedicate that time for yourself might be good. YOU come first. I hope it works out for you. You can message me anytime!

[Rjkookoo]

Not sure of your whole situation, but if your going to lose your job because you’ve missed work because of a medical diagnosis (anxiety / depression or whatever) you can get your doctor to fill out an FMLA form which may protect you legally. Well, that’s if your in the U.S. You have to have been employed there for at least 1 year. Google FMLA if you think it may apply to you. Hang in there.

[CharlieChew in reply to Rjkookoo]

Unfortunately, I haven't been at my recent job for more than an year. And I can't get the state protection (FMLA) that would protect my job. My counselor right not is not helping and just tells me if I don't go back to work I'll lose everything. Like I don't know that. I'm on an unpaid medical leave. But without my counselors support it won't be approved and I'll get fired. I'm looking for a new counselor right now. I'm just scared if losing everything.

[Rjkookoo in reply to CharlieChew]

What type of counselor? Is it a psychiatrist or psychologist? Do you know when you may be able to return to work? I’m not sure why your on medical leave, but it may impress upon your employer your desire to get back to work if you can maybe work a couple of hours a day.

[CharlieChew in reply to Rjkookoo]

It's a big company and they have their rules. I actually hate my job but it paid the bills. The medical leave was because of my depression and anxiety. My counselor won't complete anymore paperwork because she thinks I should just go back to work. I'm looking for a new dr now.

[Rjkookoo in reply to CharlieChew]

I don’t know if you’ve already had this conversation with your counselor, but what if you discuss a firm date to return to work. Suggest 4 weeks. Also discuss what would happen in the event that it’s too stressful after you return. It might give you some wiggle room until you find a new counselor. I know how depression affects people, but I can’t speak too much from personal experience on anxiety. Is there something specific that’s difficult for you to return to work?

[CharlieChew in reply to Rjkookoo]

It's a hard job and the hours are horrible. I work 2nd shift and only have Tuesdays and Sundays off. You can't have a life with that schedule. I'm alone already at 41. Never been married and no children. I live in a small community so it's hard to meet new people. And the friends I have are busy with their families. I do have a cat who I love. He's the only thing that has gotten me this far.

[Rjkookoo in reply to CharlieChew]

Are there any volunteer activities you could get involved with? Maybe something like a youth group, cub scouts or helping out at a homeless shelter. It may help you to meet new people and lift your spirits. When I worked 2nd shift I ran a lot, went to the gym, and became really focused on nutrition.

[Hidden]

I’m sorry, I’ve been in severe anxiety and depression and lost my job. I still struggle very much although am rebuilding my confidence and life again. Can you go on medical disability? In California and some other states this is an option.

[CharlieChew in reply to Hidden]

Unfortunately, I haven't been at my recent job for more than an year. And I can't get the state protection (FMLA) that would protect my job. My counselor right not is not helping and just tells me if I don't go back to work I'll lose everything. Like I don't know that. I'm on an unpaid medical leave. But without my counselors support it won't be approved and I'll get fired. I'm looking for a new counselor right now. I'm just scared if losing everything.

[Hidden in reply to CharlieChew]

My family doctor filled out my disability paperwork. A doctor or psychologist or psychiatrist can do this. Have you seen a doctor to get on medication?

[CharlieChew in reply to Hidden]

Yes, I have a counselor. But she doesn't believe I should have been out of work for so long. So she won't fill out anymore paperwork. I'm on medication and I told her I think I need a new medication. But she just thinks I'll get over it if I'm strong. I'm trying to find a new doctor now.

[Hidden]

I have been where you are. I had an awful long-term depression with severe anxiety and I couldnt work for a year. It was so bad I got put on disability. The doctors tried almost all ssri antidepressants. Finally a psychiatrist tried a really old medication on me called tofranil and it worked. Oh, there was also electromagnetic and electroconvulsive therapies they tried, to no avail. I understand your suffering. I get it. The main thing I want to tell you is that there is hope. You WILL come out of this. I don't know if you believe in God, but He is the One who led me to the right doctor and medication. I will pray that He helps you soon.

[CharlieChew in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your prayers. I'm not super religious. But my sister's godmother reached out to me about attending church with her. I'm going to try it. It can't hurt.

[matgrg in reply to Hidden]

Loved your encouragement.I've been waiting 4 months for a med to work for me. I have almost given up. Also having sleeping problems. Xanax works, but doc is going to stop it soon. Am now feeling panic that I won't be able to sleep!Any suggestions?

[Sprinkle1]

I am in the same boat as you, only I cannot work, I cannot even drive it is so bad, I do have a good therapist who got me in with a great psychiatrist. I am on medication, Gabapentin for anxiety - it is non addictive, also on two anti depressants. You need help, NOW. Do your best to find a decent therapist, look for a local "Support Group" they are usually free, and you will meet caring people who are usually willing to help each other. Just as we are here.Go online and look for services in your area, therapist who work on sliding scale fee. Look in the front of your phone book, a lot of services are listed there. Be as good to yourself as you can be. Hope these words are of help. I feel for you as I am suffering greatly. I send love and healing. A big Hug also....Sprinkle 1.....

[Bluebaja in reply to Sprinkle1]

What has your experience been with Gabapentin? What dosage. I am on it also but does not seem to be helping. I take 600 mg/ day. Thanks

[Sprinkle1 in reply to Bluebaja]

Hello, I have been on Gaba. for 3 months, I cannot tell much difference, but then I was severely poisoned by an inept practitioner and my brain is in a constant battle with itself. I was on 300 mg 4 times a day, but my sleep was very poor, my Dr. upped it to 600 mg at bed time, and I get more sleep. I am now on 1500 mg a day, my pharmacist (who I trust) tells me we have to find the right dose and watch out for side affects. It is a non-addictive drug, and is supposed to feed the brain and balance it out, I am seeing a good psychiatrist. I would talk to your Dr. or who ever prescribes your med's.

Hope this is of help to you. Sending Love. Sprinkle 1...... xx

[Bluebaja in reply to Sprinkle1]

Hi Sprinkle and thank you for the thoughtful reply. Yes, I see my Psych today. I trust him and I will see what he thinks; because my symptoms are not better. Tough times getting through each day as of now but this is pretty much a recent development. I was good for the prior 3+ years.

Hugs to you friend, Don

[Sprinkle1 in reply to Bluebaja]

Hello, thank you for your lovely reply, I hope your Dr. has been of help. I am really suffering and see my psych. Dr. on Tue (seems like an eternity away). I too have a very hard time getting thru each day, and can only wait for bed time, the only time I get any relief is when I sleep, and that is not for enough hours. I have lost all ability to watch TV, drive my car, read my books, and other things, I crave Good company, no idiots with gossip or small talk, but they seem few and far between, one reason I like to read, I love to learn. What do you do with yourself?

Think I am going to rest I get so tired, but cannot nap?!!!

I send you love and more Hugs. Sprinkle 1....xxx

[Bluebaja in reply to Sprinkle1]

What do I do with myself? Hmm.., well, I have trouble concentrating enough to read. I love to bike and walk but on my bad days that is just too much. So I sit and think; letting my negative thoughts bounce around inside my noggin. I do play word games which seem to help getting me out of my head. Sunshine helps unless I am at my lowest - at those times nothing helps. I love wine and live near a great wine region so I will go wine tasting when up to it.

My Doctor made some adjustment on my meds. I can so relate to the pain of waiting to see the Doc when feeling bad. I always joke with him that I will just wait in his waiting room until next weeks appointment...

[Sprinkle1 in reply to Bluebaja]

Hi Bluebaja, this is Sprinkle 1. I think I understand how you feel, my anxiety has me paralyzed a lot of the time. I have an exercise bike and attempt to ride is 7 miles when I get on it. Where I live it is too hot and humid to go out and walk, I pray for cooler weather. Have you tried adult coloring books, they are nice. I have a difficult time watching TV, reading my books, driving my lovely car, cooking, it sucks. I have no family here, and no close friends, so I feel like a prisoner in my own home. I come on line looking for answers and hoping to help others that are suffering. Do you live in an area where there may be support groups? They are wonderful, they are a safe place to talk and one gets love and support from others in pain. Does your Dr. have you on a med to help? I take 3 med's but I think I need a higher dose, I am still suffering very much.

I used to live in Calif. I love wine and drank my share of it, now as I am ill, I do not touch it, but I do miss it, hope to get well and indulge again in the future.

Do you have any pets? I have 2 cats and I love them so much, they put some light in my life.

Cannot think of anything else to write, so I will go and get some dinner.

I send you love and hugs, write to me and to us we will help if we can. Sprinkle 1 ...... xx

[CharlieChew in reply to Sprinkle1]

Thank you for sharing your story. And your kind words. I'm not very religious but I have a woman who wants to take me to her church. It can't hurt😀

[matgrg in reply to Sprinkle1]

Me too. I am comforted by knowing that I am not alone in this.

[Hidden]

Welcome to this site. I'm sorry to read about your struggles. Is there someone who can help you out? A family member or friend? Maybe talking to your boss about your situation could reduce your chances of getting fired. Or, maybe you can find another job quickly. I hope you get the help you need. Stay strong.

[CharlieChew]

Thank you. I really think it's to late for this job. I just have to find the strength to get another one. I don't have much of a support system. The few people who have helped have there own problems and can only do so much. Hopefully I find a job before I lose everything. But I can't think that way. One day at a time.

[matgrg in reply to CharlieChew]

Yes. One day at a time, or we will overwhelm ourselves.

[purposelife]

I'm so sorry you are going through all this. Everyone has given really good advice. I highly agree with attending a local church. God has comfort and brought me through so many difficult situations. Will be praying for you. Many blessings, take care

[PapaDocs]

Hi CharlieChew,

If you don’t have much of a support system, would you consider going to a local church and get help? You are open to going to church with your sister’s godmother anyway, why not try to go to a nearby church in the meantime. There are traditionally stiff collar churches and there are vibrant churched filled with young people and there are in between, mixed, that is. But there are many accommodating churches today, you just have to check them out.

There are a few churches in my town that have volunteers who really go out of their way to people and even have professional therapists who offer their time to help someone in need. People in church are just the same people outside, except their faith urges them to help, and I don’t mean to imply that people who don’t go to church do not help. But here they are like in a beehive waiting to serve others. I was actually helped when I had a car accident and they brought us food among other things such as give me a ride to doctors later after my accident. You can find friends there who sincerely will support you and maybe even help you in some way if ever you lose your job, though I hope that they keep you at work.

[DRERUSKEY]

wow i never new that there was a web site like this im sorry to hear about all the bad stuff going on in your lyfe but i really feel you 110% im going to the same thing and the hardest thing about it is everybody around me it just seem to me that they dont care or they dont want to help me i am so happy that i took the time to search about this sickness its really not play with well i wish you all the luck in the world just remember you are better then this depression and you can over come it i know it sound easy but its not it will take some time but just stay focus and keep your head up and im here if you need someone to talk to for real even if i can just tell you something positive everyday that will help a little bit

by the way my name is andre have a good day

[Alexapal]

I understand your pain