Im grateful to reach this site

[Xack]

I dont know what to say but ive always wanted to talk to someone freely. I cant express my true feeling without being shy or feel ashamed of my words and thoughts.Im a male. I cant handle the pressure. I dont want to work, and i hate being unemployed.

My parents are really great. They provide money and emotional support all the time. But each time i have money from them i hate myself more. I also don't want to marry so that i wont be responsible of somebody and ofcource parents are ready to finance my wedding. And even help after marraige.

They think they do great but whatever i find a job i have that thinking that working not important for me as i recieve help. But also feeling of staying next to my parents without building my career kills me.

I hate my major and i didnt want to choose it. It was my parents also who forced me to join it. I write now anonymously but i feel ashamed telling you all that im 26 years old.

And i have no plan for my future.

[CLB1125]

You are young yet and you have plenty of time to think about marriage later. If you don’t like your major and it isn’t in a the field of a career you want for yourself then you should talk to a school counselor for guidance. Maybe they could help you talk with your parents. You said you don’t want to work but you do. At some point in your life you will need to rely on yourself for your financial needs. Have you tried getting a job for just a few hours a week ? Why don’t you want to work? I know it’s hard when you’re shy so maybe find something that you don’t have to work with people. Stock person in a store or a dog walker? Just a couple ideas. Or maybe try volunteering somewhere to work on your shyness. An animal shelter Or a place they feed the homeless. What is your major? I’m not trying to tell you what to do. I’m making suggestions that you might not have thought of. You can speak freely here. Nobody judges anyone. Welcome

[Xack in reply to CLB1125]

Thanks for reply. I don't know what is the right word but i ment by major my career.. I have already graduated. Im a civil engineer but i have always wanted to be a programmer, web developer, anything associated with computer. They just forced me.it happend when i was 18.. I guess you are from Europe or US.. But in middle east.. Some parents decide for their sons and daughters even when they are 20+.. They forced me to choose this major.. And now i have no passion and i feel depressed after spending many years studying this major and then switch to another one.Although if someone who doesn't know my backstory.. He finds my gpa 3.3 and thinks i love civil.

[CLB1125]

I’m in the us. I understand why you went into that profession then. Can you study computer web development and still work at engineering? Then after you could change to that profession? It would be time consuming but worth it if that’s what you really want to do. There is a saying, if you love what you do, it’s not work. I know we are from different cultures so I don’t know how things work there. But if you really hate what you do you will always be unhappy and depressed.

[Thankfulforhelp22]

I'm also glad i found this spot. Been here a while. Welcome.

Shame is a powerful enemy but also a phony. I'm not going to lie - I still struggle with it. You have no reason to feel shame. You are 26, still young. Others and society may assign a time frame for what we should do and when, but none of it applies as we are all different. You decide what is right for yourself. The way life is makes it more like an adventure with twists and turns and surprises. It is not a rigid predetermined road from point A to point B.

Rooting for you to find your way and enjoy the process.