Feel Deflated

[MauveReader]

Hello, I work, am learning skills for a better job, and have been taking care of a relative. I also live with other relatives. My work hours were reduced and 1 of my relatives, who got themselves into financial trouble, told me I wasn't doing enough ( not the 1st time). They also told me what I'm learning is meaningless, insulted my intelligence, and made it sound like I was directionless. Even though I know they were lying, I feel deflated. They have a way of getting to me. Because I have given so much of my time and money to my family and I am taking care of 1 of my relatives, I can't just leave. I don't know what to do and feel even more depressed, than I did before.

[LifeIsThePitts]

That critical relative is projecting their insecurities onto you... PERIOD. Don't let them dictate how you feel about yourself! You're working hard to improve your career path. Family oftentimes gets a Free Pass to treat us like crap. We would never let a stranger treat us like that... WHY should we let "loved" ones get away with that kind of badgering?

Boundaries...set them for yourself, not for them. If they're not satisfied with your work ethic...tell them to get a job. It's not your responsibility to parent the family members you cohabitate with. You're being made to feel inadequate...ask yourself WHY is this happening? How do I stop internalizing THEIR pain and emotional suffering? It's not yours to carry. Focus on yourself and determine what you need to thrive.

My husband is completely estranged from his toxic abusive family since Feb '17. Best decision ever 😄 our circumstances included multiple felonies and federal imprisonment and interaction with Homeland Security and the district attorney in Indiana where his family member was prosecuted. So I completely understand the toxic family dynamic. Been with my hubby for 28 years. I don't miss my in-laws at all. Plus our families all live 5 states away from us. We left everything behind in 1997 and moved from Minnesota to Vegas. Second Best decision ever😄🤭

[MauveReader in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Thank you so much, for your response! I appreciate reading your story. I have to reach a point where I can cut them out of my life.

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to MauveReader]

Put yourself FIRST 🥇 everything else will fall in line after. You should always be your #1 priority 😉☺️

[designguy in reply to LifeIsThePitts]

Yay, good answer MissPitts.

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to designguy]

Awwww..you called me Miss 🥲 you're my favorite person today, Sir.