How has a physical injury 🤕 affected your Depression and Anxiety...&how to help a loved one in the same boat?

[LifeIsThePitts]

My sister in Minnesota went to a trampoline park with her 8 yr old son in April and ruptured her Achilles tendon. She THOUGHT she could rehab it on her own and did not get medical attention....😳🥺😲☹️

2 months later....

10 days ago she had major surgery on the ankle to reattach her Achilles tendon. It's the OPPOSITE ankle she broke in half in winter '18, and is now waiting to get the bandages off next Thurs. Her main concern is how it will look, as she's averse to scars and her other ankle has a pretty noticable one. I'm concerned she won't get the full range of motion back after 2 months of the tendon retracting while she waited for medical care.

I don't have a very close relationship with my sister but we've spoken recently so I could offer her some emotional support as I know how daunting relying on everyone around you for assistance can be when you're incapacitated. She won't be able to drive for min 10 weeks...and she's already going insane.

6 days before surgery, due to the stress of the situation, she developed shingles, the adult chicken pox resurgence of the virus in her body. She's still on antiviral meds for that.

I can tell she's overwhelmed and stressed out. I know that tone of her voice when she says "it's fine, it's fine, ITS FINE" It's NOT fine and I don't know how to reach her because she doesn't "believe" in depression. I know she's anxiety riddled and that's contributing to the decline of her mental state. I HEAR it in her verbiage and tone...we all know what it sounds like, we've all been there.

What would you do in my situation to help her...I'm kinda at a loss...how do you address mental health with someone that doesn't believe it's an issue?

[Elizabeth830]

As a high school teacher, kids sometimes come to me with their problems and I feel horrible for them. Some problems are minor and I can just be a person to listen when they say “life sucks at home” or “lots of yelling last night”. I have this one female student who sometimes comes up behind my desk just to stand next to me. It’s like she is trying to catch some calmness from me. Sometimes we make funny faces at each other. 😱 Sometimes we talk and other times she’s just quiet and I’m quiet too. One day she confided in me that she cuts herself which I already knew because I could see the scars similar to mine (our social worker and school psychologist already knew). It’s now summer vacation and there is nothing I can do to be the person she can quietly stand next to. It’s not appropriate for me to visit her and I’m not trained for what I might discover if I did.

What I am trying to say is that if your sister doesn’t believe in or want to accept mental health help, just being on the other end of the phone occasionally is probably helpful, even if you don’t even talk about the injury or mental health. Maybe send her some Uber gift cards so she could go for car rides without relying on family or friends?

Just a disclaimer about my story above, there have been times that child protective has been called and there are times when I tell our social worker that she needs to check in with the student. Again, I’m not trained to adequately address her issues but I can be there for her to stand next to, just like you can be there “standing” on the other end of the phone. Maybe eventually she will come around and realize that she could benefit from some additional outside help or her doctor might recognize it. 🤞❤️

[LifeIsThePitts in reply to Elizabeth830]

THANK you, my friend ☺️ your students story is so touching and heart wrenching. I can't imagine the pain you have to witness in these youngsters in today's society. I don't think I could handle it. Id be compelled to cross the line at some point and jeopardize my career over the neglect or abuse of a kid. I don't have children ON PURPOSE... this is definitely one of the reasons why. Plus, I'm an emotional rollercoaster 🎢 most days and wildly overprotective of those that cannot fend for themselves in every definition of the word, due to my own childhood abuse. But I can't help her if she denies there's a problem.

So I'll just Be. I needed to hear this from you. Thank you for sharing and for your ongoing support 💞 appreciate you 🙏