Panic and chaos

[gunnersun]

I cannot begin to believe how fast my level of anxiety has increased in the last few months. I went from a very fast paced career where I was in a constant state of panic to nothing. I had no clue that I was in that state until I had a panic attack after I left the job. That made me realize just how much I had been operating in that state of mind all the time. Since that first attack, I've had more that have increased in intensity and frequency. I am freaking out right now because I have too much going on around me and I can't control anything. My kids don't listen unless I completely go off the deep end, which I despise doing. My brain is not working right. I was on antidepressants and antianxiety meds for almost 2 years, went off them a few weeks ago because I felt so numb. I feel like my only choices are numb and on meds, or panic and off them. I have no emotional release valve. I don't even want advice...I just want to vent to relieve some of this pressure. My kids don't get why I'm freaking out when I do, my wife is on her own meds and isn't extremely helpful. I'm just struggling to get thru every day to where I can lay down, close my eyes and sleep for a couple hours. I love my life, my wife and my kids, but I am struggling to remain engaged with any of them.

[Agora1]

Welcome gunnersun to an understanding and caring site.

It's okay to just vent for now. When the time is right for you,

know that someone is always here 24/7 to listen or provide

support. It's going to be okay. You are not alone anymore. xx