Anxiety and therapy

[Taylormidnights]

I'm always afraid to talk and get deep with my therapist it's hard. Anxiety has been off the roof I'm scared o talk about difficult stuff and get into it. Idk why anyone maybe feel the same way? Ig I'm scared to open and relive my traumas ugh panic

[Hidden]

I've used writing before to communicate to my therapist feelings that are difficult, hard-to-express, and/or are too painful to talk about. I have had success doing it that way. Could you maybe try something like that?

[marsbarr in reply to Hidden]

Good idea

[hypercat54]

Of course you are scared and you wouldn't be human if you weren't terrified to face your demons. We all are. But your therapist is an expert on these things so will ensure it is done slowly and will be able to guide you through it.

It's pain now to avoid much more pain in the future and the chance to have a life to enjoy. It is so well worth it in the end though.

[marsbarr in reply to hypercat54]

Yes I agree, facing one's own demons is very hard

[Artistfriend]

I was going to suggest writing also, even write it to yourself at first. You can also practice to yourself what you would like to say. Trauma is universal, women, men weve all been through it, its difficult to talk about at first but will get easier. Its ok to let your therapist know what you need and what would be helpful to you

[Rox20]

Thank you so much for posting this. I just scheduled my first therapist appointment and I'm terrified about opening up. I happy to see I'm not the only person that feels that way.

[Taylormidnights in reply to Rox20]

Yup

[IlMinded]

Sorry that you are going through this, but you are not alone. Therapists are like having a romantic relationship, you want to be with someone who makes you comfortable. Bring it up to your therapist your feelings. See if they have other ways to help you open up. If not, our therapist might not be your fit. You may need a specific type of person to help you.

My personal example is I went to a therapist for 2 years. Middle age man, I could never open up to him. I also went in-person for my sessions. Fast forward to now, 3 years now with same therapist, middle aged female but more in common with me than last therapist. She made it easier to talk to. I also meet via phone call as it works best with my work/personal schedule. I am finally getting better due to my ability to open to one person versus another.

As others have recommended with writing, see if your therapist will do a meeting over the phone to see if you are in a more comfortable environment if it will help you open up.

[Civicsforever]

Ngl like I went through the same thing like this rs. Like all the therapists I went to before the one I see now I never felt comfortable opening up to. But after seeing my current therapist for a minute, I initiated bringing up on my own trauma. It was emotionally draining for a couple days but I was able to slowly work through it with the help of the therapist. But like this was only after building up a good relationship with the therapist. If you anything like me ik that finally unloading them feelings will help bring you peace in the end.

[marsbarr in reply to Civicsforever]

I hope to get there

[marsbarr]

Hi. I'm there with you. I started counseling. I am comfortable to a certain extent but then I cut off. It's like I can't say that. But in reality I know it's me. I can say that. It's what someone else told you I don't want to face my demons less long hear it coming from my mouth. I chose phone calls rather than in person or Zoom. I don't think I would have come this far if I didn't. It's been 3months . I get help yes but I know I would maybe solve my thoughts if I opened all the way up and put it on the table. Who am I gonna hurt,? My counselor.? I don't think so. Am I gonna hurt me by speaking my truth? It's not gonna hurt. It may help. I just got to let go of the fear of what someone would think and what I may hear. So you see I'm in the same place as you, but together we will get there. We will eventually become chatterboxes; lol I hope. It's time for us to let it go. I will try if you try. We are bigger than our problem. Have a spectacular day. Send me a message and let me know how it went if you like. ... I'm cheering for you.

[NeuroSeeker]

Therapy is freaking hard - don't feel bad about that. I often end a session in tears and utterly heartsick. BUT, over time, things are falling into place - and by that I mean we are starting to get to know my therapist and am getting more comfortable about talking about the things that are.buried deep inside. I think it'll be good for me.

If this is a new therapist, maybe let them know of your fear (you get to call those shots!). If they get weird or belligerent, then maybe a new therapist is on order.

Or maybe they will understand, and move slower so you can find your footing.

It's not bad if it's hard or hurts or makes you cry - if, eventually, but by bit, it let's you heal.

My heart is with you!

[yhsbirny]

If this is the case you may need a different therapist. If you cannot "open up" it's possible you just don't feel comfortable with them same as you just "click" with some people and others u don't. Staying with a therapist you are keeping at arm's length will not be productive. I am 75 and have been thru many therapists; I know how hard it can be to walk away from one even if you know deep down the person is not right for u, but many times you have to.

[TryingSoHard66]

Need to warn everyone here, do not give your email to this person. Out of the blue, for no reason whatsoever after a month of pleasant chitchat, she emailed me this:

On Fri, Feb 17, 2023 at 11:12 lina reese wrote:Omg damn ew really gross stay away. U r mentally ill ew u r so disgusting. And ugly 

[TryingSoHard66 in reply to TryingSoHard66]

The person I am referencing is TaylorMidnights.

She or he is an abusive troll.