Envy, Loneliness, and sadness

[MultifandomOtaku]

I have such a issue with envy. My friend that I've tried to rekindle with is moving in with one of her other friends (which kinda hurts cause I thought we had plans to move out together but I guess the moment we stopped talking for a bit that got trashed).

Anyways I'm insanely jealous that she gets to move in with another friend and spend everyday with them and be closer to her love interest. Many of my other old friends have gotten a new friend and whatnot (makes me feel very replaceable because after every instance they've stopped communicating with me).

I just want to have that. I'm constantly at home with my thoughts and a dysfunctional relationship with my mother.

I want to spend everyday with a friend and have a live interest to cuddle.

I feel like every time people lose me they get something better. And I'm so tired of watching other people get these good things but I'm still stuck in this sad lonely environment with no friends.

Just the typical 'when is it my turn' feeling among loneliness and feeling replaceable and like there will always be a better option over me.

[Hidden]

Time to move on?

Do these friends give you much of their time?

[MultifandomOtaku in reply to Hidden]

No. The one that's moving was my last maybe friend but I don't think I can rekindle or start that friendship over. It just hurts to move on. Its a big loss for me. Just alot of painful memories that were happy now

[Hidden in reply to MultifandomOtaku]

So do you think you should keep trying with them?

Moving on hurts but it won't hurt forever. As we get older some of us lose contact with friends, it's happened to me before. I get on and made life better for myself, decided not to depend on others so much.