Christmas

I can't believe we are nearing the holiday season. Christmas season used to be one of my most favorite times of the year. I'm not a religious person but, Christmas was always the best time of the year. It was such a feel-good season. Since I have lost my family, Christmas and the holiday means nothing to me anymore.. I have not decorated my apartment nor put up a Christmas tree in almost 3 years. Even though I am not a religious person, I can't understand how life has taken that Joy from me....... I want so much to feel that holiday Spirit again. There is just so much dreary in my home these days

[Adamj]

maybe this is the year you atleast try and put up a tree or something little I’m not saying it will bring back the feelings but maybe it might bring a little light for you to enjoy. I’m dreading this holiday season solely because of everything I’m going through. This was my favorite time of year and now dealing with crippling whatever I got going on it sucks.

[Hidden in reply to Adamj]

For many years I would go crazy and deck my apartment with all types of Christmas decorations, My wife (at the time) would always aske me why I would go nuts decorating the home If I wasn't a religious person. My only response to her would be...... "I don't believe in religion but this this the best time of the year"..... "I don't have to believe in God to enjoy the happiness that Christmas infuses into your heart." She always gave me a "you're an asshole look"..... But you know what,,,, I've always felt the spirit of the Holidays even though it wasn't religious for me. It was always about people and how they transform during that special time of year....... so, fuk her for making me feel like I was less "than" for enjoying a feel good time of year. Unfortunately I haven't felt that Spirit in a few years......... but I would pay handsomely just to feel that Holiday Spirit for just a second more

[Midori in reply to Hidden]

Even Pagans would Make merry and decorate at Winter Solstice.

Cheers, Midori

[Dolphin14]

Hi

I agree with Adam. Something small may add some joy back for you.

We have to start our own new traditions so we can enjoy something as we continue to battle our issues.

🐬

[Hidden]

Well, you can create a different family. How about inviting a couple of friends over for Christmas Eve or Christmas Day??? You don’t need to exchange gifts, just get together for a nice dinner. And you don’t have to go all out for Christmas. I’ve lived in a bunch of small apartments and I really don’t like to put up a tree in the apartment that takes up space. Plus I was involved with someone for a long time who was raised Jewish. What I like to do is put up some lights around the window and light a couple of candles on Christmas Eve and listen to some Christmas music I like. Even my ex who was Jewish liked to listen to Christmas music around Christmas. He thought it was very peaceful. I just like to hear it around Christmas. I think Christmas has become way too much about receiving presents. People can become greedy. And I prefer not to hear any Christmas music until after Thanksgiving. Some stores and malls want to play it right after Halloween!!!! Thanksgiving is a holiday that should be honored too. I hope in some way that you have a better Christmas this year. You could always volunteer at a homeless shelter or a woman’s shelter or help out at a senior living center. You would be much appreciated. 💖

[Dreamer27]

I feel the same as you. Not religious but something about the Christmas that brings happiness easily on a rough day. I will say that the feeling of celebration and high spirits about the holiday decreases every year. Something that used to be so exciting as a child is now something dreadful to come. Something that helps me out sometimes is doing small things, like watching an old Christmas movie I used to enjoy or listen to Christmas songs softly in the background that makes me feel lighter. Or drinking hot chocolate in fuzzy socks. Small actions.

[Midori]

Ah, I understand, bereavement is terrible and knocks your faith in humanity and everything else. Plus, we have had Covid to deal with, and we have all lost family and friends to that monstrosity!

I too have lost interest in the Christmas season, having moved just as Covid struck, so was stuck in a new place, not knowing the area, in lockdown, just myself and my son. As I am considered vulnerable, due partly to age and also to other conditions, my son and I have not celebrated for 3 years. To us, it is a lesser bereavement than a family loss like yours, but it can still rock any faith you might have, but Christmas was important to my kids and I, at least until they found the truth of Santa!

I feel you may still be suffering the after effects of your bereavement, and there is no set time for mourning (Queen Victoria mourned Prince Albert till the day she died, still having his clothes laid out every day and hot water brought to his room for washing.) Don't be ashamed of it, it is natural, everyone grieves differently, some recover fast, others slowly.

I found a little joy in life last Halloween, when the kids came knocking again and I had my front windows dressed with the big skeletons, a witch, a scarecrow and the Grim Reaper. and a black christmas tree in the smaller window with a skeleton rat as the topper and dressed with bones and lights. I had the Pumpkins outside, but it was very windy , as it usually is in Wales, so I couldn't put out my whole display. I hope it will be less windy this year!

Cheers, Midori

[Hidden in reply to Midori]

Hello, you made a great point about Halloween. This will be the first year the kids will be out in full force since last year we didn't see many people out. Sounds like your decorations were lots of fun even though you had to deal with the wind. Hope you and your son have a great time this year

[Midori in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, we usually do.

I hope you rediscover your joy in Christmas, too.

Cheers, Midori