How many others out there?…

[Strugglin]

How many others of you out there besides myself never had kids? Used to cause me a lot, and I DO mean A WHOLE LOT, of DEEP DEPRESSION. Took me a while, many years in fact, to finally shake it off. I’m over it now. I’ll be 48 in July so, I’ve ended up chalking it up to a blessing, believe it or not. Fascinating to me how curses become blessings and vice versa.

[NelZA]

Hi There. Can so relate to this post . I am close to 40, F and recently got married for the first time. My husband already in his 40's, also first marriage.We don't have and don't want kids. Between the two of us we have 7 nieces and 2 nephews below the age of 14. So we have kids in our lives. Both of us have Major depression . I have C-PTSD as well. We do not have to explain our choices to anybody anymore, because of our age. I can not imagine having to raise kids in this cruel world suffering from depression. We can barely emotionally take care of each other. Maintaining high functionality and having debilitating depression is a full time job on it's own. Your post meant alot to us. We might live on a different continent than you, but it is great to know there are like minded people around the world .

[GreenUser]

I have a six year old son. I love him. He brings me much happiness of course. However, there is no doubt in my mind children do not make people happier overall. Parents constantly worry about their children. Parents sacrifice their lives, friends and hobbies for their children. Mother Nature and society are designed to make us think kids are a blessing - this is not the case. Kids are justlike drugs they control you, suck your money, make you tired, make you boring and you obsess about the ‘drug’ and your next ‘hit’. Once you are a ‘drug/kid’ addict you start trying to persuade your friends to try the ‘drug’. So I agree!

[b1b1b1 in reply to GreenUser]

I think everyone is entitled to make their own choice whether to have children or not. I do, however feel that my son has been and continues to be a great blessing in my life, as well as a source of lots of enjoyment. What is appropriate for one person or couple may not be good for a different couple.

[Strugglin in reply to b1b1b1]

b1b1bu, Can you put yourself in the shoes of someone who’s in their late 40s with no children? Can you understand the stigma that’s attached to that by society? Can you understand how our culture marginalizes and ostracizes people who are child free or childless? Can you maybe root for someone who’s been able to overcome and transcend that? instead of accusing them of pushing their beliefs on someone? I explained in my original post that not having kids was a source of great depression for me. I’m happy for you and your kids, and I’m happy for people who have been able to find their own kind of happiness without kids.

[Strugglin in reply to Strugglin]

It’s funny to me that everyone talks about saving the planet yet nobody wants to stop reproducing themselves in order to do it. And since I connect 99% of the worlds problems to bad parenting, I have a little sympathy, if any. I personally think an IQ test and a personality test should be required before conception is even allowed by law. Too many malignant narcissists as parents these days. My dad is certainly one, my sister too, 3 kids. Makes me think only child households are the most healthy for the child. Yeah we need a narcissism test, prerequisite for parents. I would say you probably qualify based on my honest observations, as a narcissist. All about the blessing in your life, what about your kids life? Are you a blessing in their life?